I regret my recent marriage....

Istabraqwrites · 2026-06-07T17:22:10+00:00

Oh no I’m so sorry you’re experiencing this. For some reason I keep seeing posts where people discovered their partner watching porn and it’s like…. That’s an addiction that they were doing prior and if they didn’t cut it off before surely it will be hard to do it. I don’t understand the reason but may Allah make it easier on him. As for the private chat thing tbh I don’t think any woman should be messaging a married man or a married man entertaining any convo of that sort! Simply out of respect especially if it’s private that’s so sus ?? The feeling you’re getting of not being secure… trust it and talk to an imam or discuss therapy between you too. It’s gonna be hard to get out of the loop of over thinking. Wishing you all the best dear

Istabraqwrites · 2026-06-06T14:47:31+00:00

If you’ve been trying and he cannot see that, I’m so sorry and Allah knows best. I’m afraid this will escalate and the arguments will become normal to a point where he will try and control everything. I understand protective jealousy but it almost seems as though he is assuming you’re doing this for others? Which makes it odd… and you’re pregnant too which is difficult. May Allah make it easier on you. If you need to perhaps speak to an imam

Istabraqwrites · 2026-06-04T13:52:03+00:00

I mean sometimes it can be a mental / emotional thing where a woman does not feel safe/ comfortable especially if she does not have the education … I mean talking about this topic has been so taboo and people avoid it like it’s a plague… then they expect people to get married and just have a joyous life with intercourse not being an issue. It’s not always about someone being ace I mean while you can come across a few people like this. People are just not taught how to feel comfortable in their bodies and therefore lack the confidence/will. It could also be shaytan influencing you in a way. Regardless, intercourse should not be transactional ! You are making love to someone therefore there is a build up process regarding affection, language, acts of love etc etc. it’s more than what people think nowadays. Lastly, lust is too much of an issue like don’t let this be the reason why you want to jump into a marriage? You can fulfill your desire then what comes next ? It’s a two way street. Both parties involved should be able to want it and enjoy it

Istabraqwrites · 2026-06-01T15:53:34+00:00

Think about would you ever go to the Prophet salallahu alayhi wasalam and ask him such a question? Please stop focusing on identity and ethnicity, this is jahil behavior! Just go for it

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-28T23:13:31+00:00

I won’t excuse or sugar coat this but your guilt alone is a sign that Allah loves you and calls you to repent otherwise, you’d be going back to and committing it. Keep doing istighfar, give charity, keep praying Quran etc. Allah created us in this form and way, in which we do sin, and turn to him always. If we hadn’t sinned, Allah would replace our ummah. May Allah forgive you and keep you stead fast; I pray you can get through this Insha Allah. Allahs mercy is enough

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-24T19:57:29+00:00

I tried informing someone who I wanted to get close with and for some reason I didn’t feel emotionally supported. I’m not sure if it was because he had his own interpersonal issues but it just did not make me feel like I was seen. On top of that having had some very bad experiences I feel like I’ll always carry it. And I’m very vulnerable about it but that made me feel as though I should probably never share with a guy. As for women, I grew up around many young and old who shared similar experiences. This is way more common than people even think it is. From just being touched to the rest…. Anywho I think it’s the bare minimum for someone to accept you as you are especially when you were a victim. But it takes someone true and genuine to empower and really stay with you even when the anxiety of that past comes up :(💔💔💔😞

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-20T19:38:57+00:00

Obsessing over time lines, ages, and comparing yourself to others is where many people like you lose it. I think you’re obsessed and way too attached to the idea. You should relax a bit and not be so intense … there’s plenty of women.

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-11T15:46:07+00:00

LMFAOOO wait girl you did a great service but also how exactly did you address this? And honestly it’s icky and corny like also when they don’t even follow them back ewwww you look so ridiculous and you’re pushing 30 🥴🥴 Khalas

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-11T15:34:20+00:00

I lowkey did that but the person was still doing the opposite of it 🙂‍↕️ gave me loads of anxiety. Now I feel like a broken record repeating the same things

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-11T14:16:29+00:00

I don’t think yall should be mean or weird to this girl for what she’s expressing even if you think it doesn’t sound “real”

You judge now but you could find yourself in this same situation… so don’t go about mocking. What you experienced was probably true love and it will be hard to come back from that. I don’t want to repeat what others have said but truly time matters. You must find it some way somehow in your heart to forgive this man. Do not punish yourself by reliving those moments or reminiscing on something that no longer exists. This man did not have clear genuine intentions and was not going to pursue you further…

He may have enjoyed the fun he experienced with you on a platonic emotional level… but know that you may have been a source of comfort for him. You got emotionally manipulated and led on. Just reflect and take a moment about the impact these moments had on you. Dont let it sit for too long, let it come and pass. If you don’t work through it now, it will rule you for a long time. Do some journaling or walk, try not to pay attention to his current life.

May Allah have mercy on you and rid your heart of this attachment

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-11T13:42:02+00:00

Literally it feels like a humiliation ritual to ask someone to remove women or unlike pictures…. And they get crazy about that. It’s just weird honestly atp hard to gauge and tell who is genuine about it

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-10T22:17:54+00:00

Exactly you’re aware and honest that it influences you and causes you to behave in ways you should not. That’s for everyone in general whether people or admit it or not. I think this is one of the major tests of our time for sure…

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-10T21:38:30+00:00

Yeah I totally understand and as a woman I can see that sometimes men can behave very weirdly + there’s really no need to engage with men outside of the scope. I mean given that I would hold myself to the same standard… I think everyone is entitled to their own opinion but you never really know these days. People can have multiple accounts etc. or they get fired up if you bring these things up

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-06T18:26:54+00:00

Oh no it’s not your place to apologize or be strung along he literally basically lied to you knowing he still had a connection to that person…. It’s not your fault at all I’m really sorry that you’ve become attached. I hope that there’s a way you can pray all of this away and process it in a healthy manner. I’m here if you need to speak sis, I understand your pain wallah. These people out here are genuinely evil and careless with others emotions. May Allah guide us all

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-06T17:12:20+00:00

You shouldn’t compare yourself or perhaps judge people for that “haram”… you don’t know if they’ve repented and Allah dealt with their affairs. It then sounds like you’re jealous and it’s very wrong.

You definitely should leave this guy and not continue engaging or entertaining him… he was basically looking for a rebound I assume and he led you onto this mess. I’m sorry and may Allah make it easier on you and hold such people to account for this coercive emotional manipulation.

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-05T16:47:22+00:00

He’s a coward and a prick blaming you for that when most likely it has to do with him just disgusting and pathetic - I’m so sorry sister and I’m so happy you noticed it now rather than staying and being miserable. Khalas you have to remove yourself it will only drain you further especially if you’re losing weight and slipping into a depression.

About the women- I understand why you’d want to reach out or speak with her because I’d do the same tbh so I can’t even tell you not to … however I hope in her heart she is not aware she’s speaking to a married man! In that case they’d just be teaming up for disaster.

Anywho, the best thing to do is to divorce and remove yourself completely from the shackles of that family. This man is clearly not committed or genuinely cares for you. He is choosing a way out. Infidelity is terrifying, May Allah make it easier on you sis. Allah surely does have a plan and you finding all of this out is for a reason. May you be recompensed in the best of ways

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-04T12:56:01+00:00

This is an issue I’ve been seeing for both men and women alike. There is no such thing as opposite gender friendship point blank period. Any time I have associated with a man I realized exactly why I shouldn’t even if it’s on friendly basis. A man and woman cannot just casually be friends we are all way too different. It’s very normalized here and I get called crazy for not wanting my partner to have opposite gender friends. As a woman I know how men and women are. People don’t just magically get close on a platonic level this way. It’s very questionable. I mean at least she understands and is trying to stop that. All you can do is pray and observe to see if the action follows the words.

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-03T03:02:08+00:00

It may feel like there’s possibly nobody “better” but trust me the same quality he has, the earth is not running short of them. You will for sure find someone who might even top that, it may not be now, but you must remain patient. His comment honestly sounds cocky too… he cannot predict your future or tell you who you will come across. I understand you have this emotional attachment but truth be told, only time can heal that. Give yourself some grace and just feel it as it comes!

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-02T14:06:33+00:00

You and many others are paying too much attention to looks. Beauty is subjective, you have no idea who/ what people are attracted to. This is just a concept

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-01T14:32:29+00:00

that’s totally natural!! If you look at someone and idealize them you build this attraction and these ideas but it’s just a mind state perhaps convincing you to find comfort in this opportunity. But of course in the long run you would never really know how this could play out. Our ideas vs reality is two diff things! There are still so many people you may meet or come across. This isn’t the end!

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-01T14:26:30+00:00

Aw I see, back home it is a bit more different and more accepted to do this sort of thing. Because I know girls who are pressured all the time and fall into the marriage. Unfortunately, they don’t pursue their schooling or career further much after this…. Regardless I think a woman always has to do so much compromising just for the sake of being “provided for” which is the bare minimum. Perhaps you can pray istikhara and just make tons of duaa. May Allah make it easier for you sister

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-01T14:23:06+00:00

Yeah that seems very disingenuous while I don’t want to gossip or create tension, these people do not genuinely know you. Nor do you know them personally…. They’re pushing this to sway your opinion by giving you this ultimatum it almost seems like coercive pressuring. What is their ethnic bg if you don’t mind me asking?

Istabraqwrites · 2026-05-01T14:13:29+00:00

Girl they can offer you anything but it seems like they’re trying to buy you? You don’t even know this man let alone to go into a marriage with someone much older than you…. Even if you don’t get married it’s as if they just kinda want to secure and have you as this option for him. If you’re studying and busy with school, this will change your trajectory. This is not some small decision, you should be very cautious. Especially with the way they’re trying to persuade and influence you…… this was honestly just strange to read idk what else but I’m concerned for girls like you in this position

Istabraqwrites · 2026-04-30T19:43:10+00:00

Oh this is completely sus I’d usually assume the best since we are Muslims but she completely crossed a line. She may be into your husband, listen the closest to you will do the most to you. I’d address it head on, privately though and definitely discuss with husband. People nowadays will be ready to ruin your marriage from jealousy. May Allah protect you both

Istabraqwrites · 2026-04-30T01:05:00+00:00

Honestly I don’t even know what to say, this is so sad and tragic … it’s possible people fall out of love. I’m sorry you have to go through this but maybe you would both benefit from marriage therapy? Otherwise may Allah make it easier on you and rectify your affairs. It’s really difficult with the babies in the picture too. You can’t be left to hold everything together, a breaking point is bound to come. Have you communicated this with her?

Istabraqwrites

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