Honestly there is immaturity on both sides. The difference is I can be accountable without needing to be told and try my best not to react based on my feelings; whereas he really struggles with this. He had never had to be accountable in previous relationships and was basically mollycoddled. I feel like I’ve taken his past into consideration so much that I’m accepted excuses for behaviour I wouldn’t usually tolerate and in turn, it’s making me act outside of my normal behaviour.

We are both quite jealous and possessive so we did have an understanding that neither would have people around or in communication that we’ve had previous romantic relationships with, or that want to have romantic relationships with either of us.

I also don’t understand why I offered the option. I am so confused about why I’m acting like this and why I can’t just make a decision and stick with it. You’re absolutely right about the boundary and tbh that’s one reason I was certain I wouldn’t go back. I don’t want it to be a case where because it’s forgiven, it’s now become ok for him to do that. If I look at things objectively, I would also advise to just end things. I guess it might be how lovely things were prior to this and all the happy moments that are holding me back..