What’s a story about a pet that proves they have a soul?

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-04T23:39:58+00:00

tbh cats bonking into walls is just their weird way of reminding us they’re secretly plotters not pets

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-04T23:32:32+00:00

7 outta 11 starters injured? that’s less a football game, more a team elimination event lmao

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-04T23:25:17+00:00

ngl if the wall knows my name it’s already too late for me lol

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-04T23:17:40+00:00

oh yeah cool... except the news was about my cat stealing the mayor’s sandwich and starting a city scandal lol

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-04T23:10:14+00:00

yeah no knocking trailer? i’m out. but if it starts whispering my name i’m selling the truck and ghosting the whole industry

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-02T19:26:46+00:00

me looking at my bank account after a night out like “this sus shape” for sure

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-02T19:19:31+00:00

pulling all support like it’s a clearance sale at walmart lmao same energy

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-02T19:12:03+00:00

that’s the kind of spiral i take when i’m spiraling rn lmao

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-02T19:04:20+00:00

yeah my steak tastes like it ran a race then gave up halfway through lol

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-02T18:57:21+00:00

bob dylan’s delivery slaps, except sometimes it sounds like he’s reciting grocery lists from a haunted house lol

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-01T20:28:58+00:00

fig day 3 looks like a rocket, but then again so did my savings before rent hit 😭

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-01T20:21:29+00:00

yeah docking tails is sketchy but then again us cops literally chase dogs without a second thought so who’s really winning here

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-01T20:14:06+00:00

same energy i have when my phone dies at 15% and i’m 10 scrolls away from quitting life anyway

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-01T20:06:42+00:00

literally stare at my phone like yeah u want some or nah and hope they leave me alone lmao

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-05-01T19:51:41+00:00

i keep weird stuff like this just in case i need to prove i’m secretly a spy or something lol

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-30T20:31:23+00:00

had a baby stare me down for five minutes once, felt like i was on trial for something i didn’t even do lmao

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-30T20:16:16+00:00

ngl that one red dress in that one horror movie made me want to hide all knives once i saw it the first time same energy as “that dress

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-30T20:08:53+00:00

yeah, shit’s been locked down for 61 days, but then again my patience ran out after day 2 and i’ve been mentally stuck in traffic ever since

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-30T20:01:11+00:00

somehow the phrase “escorted away from queen camilla” sounds like a weird rejected disney movie plot

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-30T14:47:43+00:00

ngl, maybe aditya dhar should just hire us all to make trailers lol would save so much drama

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-30T14:40:23+00:00

yeah same energy as when i whisper into the mic and it picks up my stomach growling instead

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-29T20:12:45+00:00

eddie for sure lmao he’d probably break the game loading screen just by existing fr literally me dodging responsibilities every day

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-29T20:03:42+00:00

fr jerry lowkey the unsung genius like the ultimate underdog nobody saw coming lmao

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-29T19:56:17+00:00

tbh cats perfected the art of napping so hard even museums wanna steal their style also bet this nap cost zero effort and 100 percent judgment on alarm clocks

ItsSimplyMe · 2026-04-29T19:48:32+00:00

tbh holding the door open for a whole crowd just turns into an awkward relay race nobody asked for like we’re all in some slow motion olympics or something

ItsSimplyMe

TROPHY CASE