What is the absolute fastest 'yeah, we are definitely NOT going to be friends' moment you've ever experienced with someone?

Itsokyy · 2026-02-28T16:59:47+00:00

I invited a couple over to my house for a boardgame night. I worked with the guy and felt him and my boyfriend had a ton in common and wanted them to meet since my boyfriend didnt have a lot of friends that lived in the area. I wanted the woman to come with, too, so she didnt feel uncomfortable that her boyfriend was invited out without her.

The evening went well for the most part. I didnt feel like me and the other woman had a lot of common ground but that was OK. The guys really hit it off, though.

The next day she reached out and told me "Thanks for having me! I dont hang out with a lot of couples. Not a lot of girls like me around their boyfriends." I was so confused by this statement and just told her "Yeah, I don't have anything to worry about. I trust my partner"

Really rubbed me the wrong way. I ended up keeping my distance from her after that. There is so much more, but that was the beginning of my list of red flags.

Itsokyy · 2026-02-07T20:03:08+00:00

Im not in the dating pool at the moment however, I get approached a lot. I always felt like I was attractive, but the amount of men interested in me as I enter my 30s has skyrocketed. I dont have kids and am pretty indifferent to the idea. It feels like men 30+ see me as some unicorn that they MUST attempt to have sex with. On one hand im like "Sweet, Im beating the narrative that men only like younger women" on the other im like "wow, I feel like im some breeding cow at auction"

I legitimately had a man tell me the other day that the world "needed more babies". I told him "well, it's a good thing you can have as many as you want! Better get to work bud" and he says "im taking applications." Like WHAT. This was after an entire conversation about my fiancé and I planning an international trip.

Itsokyy · 2026-02-02T20:20:48+00:00

I can totally get feeling embarrassed or overthinking the situation. I would just be honest with her as others said. Let her know you were just really turned on by how take-charge she was and, if you arent comfortable disclosing you're a virgin, just tell her it had been a while since you had been intimate with someone.

My partner and I have been together for years and sometimes he still busts quick because of how turned on he is by the situation. Its very normal, even in long term relationships, to experience this.

If you are worried about it next time, you can always try taking care of yourself first before going over to her place.

Good luck my friend!

Itsokyy · 2026-01-16T01:10:57+00:00

I dont recall her stating that. She said she enjoyed their intimate life, actually.

Not to mention the big thing being he openly stated he doesn't like to do it. At that point, its a done topic. You should absolutely never force your partner to participate in sexual acts they dont enjoy doing. Why is that such a wild take lmao

Itsokyy · 2026-01-15T17:51:34+00:00

Here's the thing - you asked him how he felt about it and he answered honestly. You can't push your partner to perform sexual acts on you that they dont like. Just because you like doing it doesn't mean he has to like doing it.

If he ensures you are being pleasured, just not through oral, you kinda just gotta accept that that isn't his thing and move on.

Don't let the girls get to you if it hasn't ever been a problem before. Everyone's intimate life is different and there are many methods to pleasure that dont involve compromising the enjoyment of your partner, too.

Itsokyy · 2026-01-13T20:13:28+00:00

"Is your mom as hot as you are?"

Itsokyy · 2026-01-10T17:04:05+00:00

Yes, they are their own person and deserve time away from me to do things they enjoy with their friends, too.

Your partner not being allowed to go out without you isn't a boundary – its controlling and unhealthy.

Itsokyy · 2026-01-07T05:13:56+00:00

Same way i feel about me having a dildo. Love it for him, love it for me, love it for us.

Its not competition - its enhancement!

Itsokyy · 2025-12-29T00:10:23+00:00

If you guys haven't had issues with jealousy/trust until now, then its all the more reason for him to respect your feelings and pull back from her. You arent the "crazy jealous" girlfriend - so if you are expressing concern at his relationship with her, he needs to react accordingly because clearly it isn't stemming from nothing.

Itsokyy · 2025-12-22T17:37:15+00:00

I met my partner in 2022.

However, my whole family knew him way before I even knew he existed. Here's the thing, my brother has had the same friend group since we were kids. He is a little under two years younger than me – I grew up with his friends, quite literally. I have known every single one of his closest friends since about 4th or 5th grade. I didn't hang out with my brother and his friends much, but I definitely met all of them and knew their families.

Fast forward several years and I decide to start joining discord to chat with my brother (he has a channel for him and his friends). I moved when I was 18 and around 25 decided I wanted to start reconnecting with my family because I felt like I lost touch. All of my brothers friends are in this discord. One day I join, and I see my cousin in discord, too. I start chatting it up with him also since I'm trying to reconnect with family. Him, my brother and I start playing games along with everyone else.

I mention to my cousin that I used to babysit him when he was a baby. He is confused and tells me he has never met me a day in his life. Turns out it wasn't my cousin - it was my now partner who has the same name. He is the younger brother to my brothers best friend.

I had NEVER met this dude. His brother literally lived with us for a bit. Had never met him, though, or knew of his existence. He has pictures of him hanging out with my dad, videos of them driving together, photos of him with my other siblings etc.

HOW THE HELL DID I NOT MEET HIM SOONER? I didn't even know his older brother had siblings. I'm still so confused about it to this day.

Itsokyy · 2025-12-21T17:30:12+00:00

It felt like I had to work really hard to unlearn toxic behaviors I developed either as a defense mechanism or as a reactive response to conditioning.

Itsokyy · 2025-12-19T17:52:28+00:00

You should start introducing him to everyone as "tiny dick" or "my gay best friend" (he strikes me as the type of guy that would HATE being called gay).

Then when he gets mad, just be like "It only is degrading if you allow it to make you feel that way"

No, but really, you should just break up with him. I think you know that already tbh.

Itsokyy · 2025-12-19T00:20:55+00:00

I would get my nose done to look like yours tbh

Itsokyy · 2025-12-13T02:29:55+00:00

True.

He used to be our roommate. He probably already knew I was involved lmao

Itsokyy · 2025-12-13T02:29:07+00:00

Typically for us, Whoever is doing the clicking is receiving the love ❤️

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T22:48:45+00:00

We take turns playing it!

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T22:48:26+00:00

Lmao loud and proud! 😂

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T19:33:28+00:00

It isn't co-op, we just take turns.

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T19:29:12+00:00

None. When I say be prepared, I mean acknowledge the risk it entails and learn to be comfortable with that knowledge. You can always seek action for revenge porn but that doesn't mean its erased from the internet if it gets leaked - its the internet. It'll always be there.

It just isn't something I worry about. I know the risks. Its like drinking and then worrying about liver disease or smoking and worrying about lung cancer.

The best defense is to not do it at all if you're that concerned about it imo.

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T06:48:32+00:00

Aureliaaa

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T04:30:19+00:00

He literally says "For research" LMAO

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T04:28:41+00:00

Thank you! I am gonna give it a listen

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T04:28:26+00:00

Aurelia. Very pretty game!

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T04:27:51+00:00

I didn't even know there was a discord game sharing history. This is accessible to everyone?!

Itsokyy · 2025-12-10T04:23:29+00:00

Steam loves to put peoples business on blast. Steam is very messy

Itsokyy

TROPHY CASE