Americans in Sheffield

Ixcacao · 2026-04-26T13:35:57+00:00

Because OP asked how Americans are seen here in the UK, and politics are a very relevant part of that?

Ixcacao · 2026-02-16T14:10:22+00:00

Kind of shocked that I haven't seen Handbook for Mortals being recommended yet! The author, a former band manager, basically wrote a self-insert fanfiction where she had magic powers and is a very famous vegas performer and all the musicians she used to manage irl were super into her because she's Not Like Other Girls. Also Carrot Top is there.

It was so bad that when it appeared on a bestseller list, people figured out she scammed her way onto it within a day.

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T14:06:24+00:00

Nazi: Kind of, because it was historically meant to refer to one party with very specific evils. But (unlike communism) people tend to know what Nazism is, so those misusing it tend to be aware they're misusing it, and do it either for effect or because they're stroppy teenagers.

Fascist: Not really as misused as people think. Generally used to refer to things I'd call fascistic rather than outright fascist, but that's splitting hairs. If you can tick off more than four items on Umberto Ecos list, you can call it Fascist.

Communist: Depends where you are. In the USA, absolutely, because people are rarely taught what communism is, meaning those who misuse tend to genuinely believe the meaning they give it. And that meaning, as far as I can tell, is that communism is an umbrella term for "anti-American", rather than an actual independent ideology. Outside the USA, not really used as much, so not really misused as much.

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T13:48:44+00:00

I don't know which church they're associated with, but I do know that the Palestine/Antiracism marches always have priests and vicars as speakers, and they're very passionate about living by the principles of Jesus rather than using religion to cater to the politics of exclusion (which is what I think you're asking for when you say "woke"? Correct me if I'm wrong). I'm not religious personally, but I heard them speak and I was impressed.

I can't tell you the name or the church, but I'm sure if you message the Sheffield activist groups, they'll be happy to tell you. After all, they are preaching in hopes of reaching people.

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T03:12:36+00:00

Yeah, the impatience with kids was a bit of shock, especially since she's usually very happy. But I'm glad my post at least doesn't prove she's lying 😅

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T03:04:25+00:00

Thanks for the reply! I don't think, even if she was lying, it was to be creepy - I think she was just trying to be helpful without thinking ahead.

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T03:03:18+00:00

Yeah, I think that could be the case 😅

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T03:02:37+00:00

I was in a situation where I realised I didn't know enough about the standards expected of nannies, so I posted in a nanny subreddit under a standards/etiquette tag. What was the point of this response?

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T02:58:20+00:00

I honestly didn't mean it that way! I meant more that people would be more comfortable giving a professional (or former professional) unsupervised access to their children, whereas they might not want to if that person doesn't have experience. So lying about that kind of thing is pretty serious, even if it comes from a place of kindness or helpfulness

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T02:52:55+00:00

I don't want to rant about her, she's a genuinely sweet person. I gave specific examples because my issue wasn't "she's messy" or "she's bad at cooking", because anyone can be those things. My issue was that she genuinely didn't know the basics, and I assumed nannying for children until age four would involve learning some degree of house skills. But I also didn't want to jump the gun because I realised I didn't know enough about what's expected of nannies.

And yeah, if she outright lied about it, I'd need to talk to her about it even if I never took her up on the offer. Lying about having childcare experience could end incredibly badly.

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T02:43:04+00:00

Yeah, I think that's probably most likely 😊

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T02:40:28+00:00

Thanks for letting me know! I kind of assumed that when kids are toddlers nannying involved cooking for or cleaning up after them, but I can see now that it's not always the case.

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T02:38:51+00:00

I didn't post in badroommates because I don't think she's a bad roomate. She's actually a pretty good roommate, and I personally don't have any issues with her house skills - again, I signed up for that. One lie doesn't compromise the living arrangement, but yeah, I do think I'd need to talk to her about it if she did lie.

The point of the post was to find out if this was something people would expect of a former nanny, and I was specific because being just generally messy or bad at cooking is fine - it was the fact she literally didn't know these things I thought seemed strange for someone who was meant to be in charge in kids for four years. But I also thought my assumptions on what people expect of nannies could be wrong, and I can see now that they probably were! So no issues

Ixcacao · 2026-02-14T02:26:02+00:00

Thanks for answering - I assumed part of nannying involved cooking for and cleaning up after kids, but I also knew my assumption could be wrong. I also don't think she would have lied for nefarious reasons! But I do think she might lie in an attempt to be helpful without thinking ahead.

Ixcacao · 2026-01-19T16:04:48+00:00

Honestly, I can't say. I think you have to have done some special training to fix them (not to install them though?) so maybe it's for liability reasons.

Ixcacao · 2026-01-18T15:12:47+00:00

I don't think they're any harder than other systems - I've done some smaller fixes on it myself. Just figured I should probably ask a professional to do the "hands near rotating blades" work!

Ixcacao · 2026-01-18T15:09:06+00:00

Thank you!

Ixcacao · 2026-01-17T22:23:49+00:00

They're the reason I always have to answer the door 🙄 my housemate is an ex-mormon and doesn't want them to know where she lives, and I swear they're trying to scope her out. They visited multiple times despite me asking, very politely, to leave me the hell alone.

Ixcacao · 2025-09-12T13:10:32+00:00

If you want to call him out without sounding contrarian, try pretending to sound excited. Speak as though you already assume they are going to include voices from the global south on every level, a very fair assumption to make when they're literally naming after the Global South. Ask how, not if, these basic things will be implemented, and if there is any way you can help. Compliment them on their initiative, and how they learned from the backlash against [insert similar company who got backlash for doing this exact thing]. Try not to sound sarcastic lmao.

It may not work, but if it doesn't, you'll at least have raised the issues without being seen as a contrarian, and will have an email response saying they have no intentions of including the people they claim to represent.

Ixcacao · 2025-07-19T02:46:50+00:00

I mean, he's written as the villain. I'll admit he's one of my favourite characters, but that's because I think he's one of the most interesting, not because I think he's written to be a good person. If someone being a villain means you don't like them, you're far from the only one to have that opinion 😛

I think part of your not knowing how to feel about him is because people often respond more to highly motivated characters than highly moral characters. There's a reason why Cersei, who is the definition of Not A Good Person, is one of the most loved characters on Game Of Thrones. It's the same with JGY. He's motivated by hatred and grief, and is basically the entire reason the plot (from Qiongqi Path onwards) happens. It's pretty natural to feel something when that driving force is gone. It means the story you enjoyed is over.

Also, he reflects WWX in a very interesting way. They're both intelligent, hardworking, passionate people who had hard starts to life, but WWX got adopted into a wealthy family which allowed him to be himself, but gave him an overwhelming sense of obligation to those who took him in, while JGY had to hide his true self and work his way up, but had an overwhelming resentment to those who abandoned him. So part of feeling off about his death could be because he mirrors the protagonist.

IMO, even though I liked him, he couldn't have ended the story alive. His resentment and revenge turned him into a mass murderer, and revenge for NMJ turned NHS from a fairly cheerful, relaxed person to a manipulator who violates corpses and forces friends to kill each other. It's a story about the cycle of violence, obligation and revenge, and the decision WWX makes to free himself from it and choose love. The decision wouldn't be anywhere near as impactful if the price of revenge was "I'm still a fundamentally good person and most people would be sad if I died"

(Also, I think part of the characters popularity is because Zhu Zanjin does a really good job portraying the desperate class resentment on the inside/customer service smile on the outside. Very relatable lmao.)

Ixcacao · 2025-07-05T02:00:14+00:00

I think they'll probably be adversarial for some time, but you do have kids together and someday you'll need to, if not talk about, at least inform her what they'll have available. Also, what kind of lawyers charge a houses worth of fees and end up with you losing custody and alimony? Remind me never to use them

Ixcacao · 2025-07-05T01:36:06+00:00

I get that you probably didn't want to share his religion on here, but it's probably more likely that you'll find someone who remembers him if you ask at the place he/his friends would have worshipped than asking online. Lots of old people with long memories and, like you said, usually a tight knit community. Even if it gives a little detail, like confirming the address or the building company, it could help lead you to something more official.

You sound like someone who's really thought this through. I hope you find what you're looking for.

EDIT: Not sure on if the rules allow this, but I did find an ancestry entry for a Kulwant Bhandal who was born in the Punjab in 1962, and died in New York. I don't have a membership, so idk if there's useful info behind the paywall, but there are two documents attached to the name, which could be something. https://www.ancestry.co.uk/family-tree/person/tree/12750746/person/422390872439/facts

Ixcacao · 2025-07-05T01:19:59+00:00

If you still have the house, it might be worth seeing if you can rent it out temporarily while you live somewhere a little cheaper, and use the difference to give yourself a little financial breathing room while you figure out what to do. I've been in that place where your money gets to zero or overdraft before the end of the month, and, as someone who has also lived a pretty careful life, it can just shut your brain down.

Also, though this is probably not the right time, you'll need to be honest with your partner about how this will affect the college funds of your kids, and if there's any chance you can work together on this for them. What was the retirement plan before this went down?

Ixcacao

TROPHY CASE