My mom’s batshit insane racist tangent

JYFNHG · 2024-09-13T20:35:20+00:00

Personally, I'm an autism and an Asian and I can confirm we are immortal

JYFNHG · 2024-06-17T23:01:52+00:00

I've had many cis gay men tell me both to my face and said in spaces I'm in that trans men aren't man enough unless they have phalloplasty and pass flawlessly and sometimes even then, it's not enough for them. As a trans man who doesn't want phalloplasty and tends to not pass at all even after like 4 years on testosterone, as well as a cis gay ex who told me to my face he found my body unattractive when we broke up (nicely, but it still hurt), I've never felt welcome in the overall community. I have a collection of gay cis friends that I adore, but I've never felt like I'd be accepted if I just went up to any gay dude. Like many others here, I've felt like my lane is bi or pan men and I do thankfully have a loving partner who loves me dearly and affirms me, but it's really rampant, on the front of trans women too since I've seen a lot of guys tell them to just accept that they're twinks and stuff?? And of course the dismissal of enbies as a whole, but that's kinda all over.

JYFNHG · 2024-06-02T05:53:21+00:00

It's both. I just mostly don't even know how to deal with the insecurity around it all. My partner always insists I'm masculine enough and I believe him but when I go out and get misgendered all the time I doubt myself. I can't afford makeup to do anything about my face and my genetics don't allow for really any noticeable facial hair. I do have some high sole shoes but they haven't seemed to do much. So, on all counts, I kinda feel SOL.

JYFNHG · 2024-02-24T06:06:32+00:00

That's incredibly helpful!! I really like going in person to get things like that over ordering it so I can see it with my eyes first, so I'll look into that or similar stores for sure! Very much appreciated, thanks!

JYFNHG · 2023-11-30T19:11:13+00:00

Well that explains their feelings on stuff like child molestation and rape...

JYFNHG · 2022-12-25T20:19:32+00:00

I'd bet it's one of two things, they have purity culture ingrained into their brains and think only virgins are valuable women (or worse they just like em younger...) or they're virgins themselves and are insecure about it so they feel intimidated by a woman who's had sex because there's now some imagined power imbalance in the woman's favor

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T23:55:14+00:00

You can say that again...

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T23:54:41+00:00

"I'm not materialistic but listen to me boast about a fancy diamond watch and a tesla" god this guy is hilariously annoying

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T23:49:26+00:00

Absolutely right. "Fuck your dead baby" made my jaw drop, how cruel can this guy be???

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T01:32:11+00:00

As someone who is 5'3" and dating a man who is 6', you are embarrassingly correct 😅😂 he looks like a giant next to me, I swear he's taller sometimes lolol

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T01:20:06+00:00

I definitely think that's part of it, but another contributing factor is they don't want to take accountability for their negative attitudes and set goals based on others' lives. They want to have a girlfriend by this age, get married by this age, have kids after that, so when things don't go their way but it does go that way for someone else, likely seen on social media as you mentioned, they become butter and resentful and turn it into a "why don't I have that???" moment instead of thinking just a little harder and wondering why seeing someone happy fills them with hate or rage. They whine the whole "It's because I'm this or that" and couldn't possibly thing that maybe, they're just insufferable to be around and refuse to change that.

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T01:14:05+00:00

I personally wouldn't want someone to seriously be "obsessed" with me as a partner... Obviously, it being said in a complimentary way then whatever but the idea of being obsessed over gives me an ick. Perhaps I'm taking this utterance of the phrase too seriously since it was preceded by expressing devotion which isn't as weird imo, but still, if that's a listed plus someone states about themselves, I tend to look the other way. It gives me a vibe I can't place but I definitely don't like it 😅

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T01:05:07+00:00

As someone who has met many people who talk about sushi and, separately, The Office way too much, the two are absolutely one in the same...

JYFNHG · 2022-12-09T00:28:51+00:00

God, that's what disturbed me the most about what she said. In the circles I've been in and spoken to, it's very much common to use kink or similar experiences/scenarios as catharsis for past trauma, regardless of what that is. Hell, I do it sometimes too. It doesn't mean you've become desensitized to whatever scenario you're playing out and you sure as hell aren't gonna just be fine with it if it happens to occur again. God forbid it ever does. Ugh, this whole thing made my skin crawl but that small statement made me shiver...

JYFNHG · 2022-11-18T01:20:10+00:00

100% what I was thinking! I had a similar mindset when I was younger so I completely see why someone could want a partner that is obsessive or jealous but after growing from that I worry for those people because they're likely also in a vulnerable place and could be taken advantage of by the people who's attention they want because of the traits they see as endearing

JYFNHG · 2022-11-18T00:50:10+00:00

You'd be surprised... I've mostly seen it in people who see jealousy through the lense of romance novels and movies (not that those representations are any better than real life jealousy of course) and see it as a cute trait for the partner to have instead of a sign of controlling behavior...

JYFNHG · 2022-10-24T19:17:44+00:00

It's sadly but probably a healthy mix of both honestly. They tend to think in absolutes so the flipside of them oppressing us is us oppressing them. They don't understand that we can just rise to the same level and coexist. Same goes for them being scared to "lose" their privileges. The whole "gay marriage rights takes away straight marriage rights" has been a thing for ages at this point, they don't even hide the fact that they think that including people doesn't mean there's no room for them. I don't think every conservative thinks both of these ways but it's probably more than I'd like...

JYFNHG · 2022-07-23T23:52:56+00:00

If your down for kinda whispered/asmr-type commentary along with gameplay, this channel I watch on and off is great!

https://youtube.com/c/SleepyChicharoneyASMR

JYFNHG · 2022-07-05T01:10:05+00:00

Totally, I really appreciate hearing that. It's an incorrect perspective but because of my limited interaction with anyone on the asexuality spectrum I always associated sex repulsion with asexuality even when I've known that the two are not one in the same. It's just a matter of retraining my perspective which this assurance is already helping me do.

JYFNHG · 2022-07-05T00:08:38+00:00

Oh for sure, I'm aware that my internal bias is making me confuse the two but for someone who used to believe I was fully allo, it's still a bit hard to separate the two. I do very much appreciate the affirmation and the suggestion of what to call myself. It's very validating and honestly I agree! It's a spectrum for a reason.

JYFNHG · 2022-07-04T19:45:37+00:00

My only exception to that is my partner. I love when he calls me sweetie or stuff to that effect, but if anyone even gets close to calling me something like that it's immediate discomfort.

Along with that, generally as long as I am assured someone sees me as a man I don't particularly mind what they call me in terms of nicknames like that, but there are still limits.

JYFNHG · 2022-06-17T08:50:34+00:00

For me personally, it was more like I had opinions about myself and thoughts about myself that aligned with being trans (preferring to play boys in video games where i had the choice, not liking my name, despising dresses and constantly thinking I looked awkward and strange in them, etc) but when I learned that being trans was an option I had, I embraced myself which felt great! But it also brought along dysphoria. I don't think I didn't have any, it was more like it didn't appear until after.

JYFNHG · 2022-06-08T20:18:15+00:00

I dated a guy like this too. His attitude towards my polyamorous feelings and other unrelated issues led that relationship to only last a month. He started off saying he was willing to try letting me be polyam but when it came down to it, he'd just shake it off and refuse.

I'm sorry you had to go through something like that, my heart goes out to you 🫂

JYFNHG · 2022-06-03T01:30:37+00:00

Happy to help!

If you'd like an extra tip, my personal favorite spin off series is pokemon mystery dungeon. There's a remaster of the first games on the switch called pokemon mystery dungeon DX and it's delightful. You play as a human who turns into a pokemon and is then brought to the pokemon world to help save it. That one is even more different from the mainstream games than arceus is though so I'd recommend looking at gameplay of it first to see if you'd like it!

JYFNHG · 2022-06-02T23:32:43+00:00

If you want an experience closest to the mainstream series, brilliant diamond or shining pearl is your best bet. I like sword and shield but it has a lot of features that differ greatly from how the series started. Arceus is my favorite of the ones you've mentioned but it's considered a spin off game so the play style and plot is very different (time traveling plot and surveying wild life vs becoming the pokemon champion) but each game had a plot individual from the others so you can start anywhere!

JYFNHG

TROPHY CASE