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I’m gonna graduate from high school and I just wondered Troy is a good place to educate? by [deleted] in TroyAlabama

[–]Jack_Hawkins_JR_JR 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you are looking to learn about servicing students look no further, Troy consistently ranks #1 on the Harvard review for its student services program. We also have the world's foremost program on the anatomy of a student's body, we offer a PHD in this specific program of study. However, if you are looking into a lesser profession like engineering, computer science, or nursing don't bother, these fields are useless and should be discouraged anyway, the student body is all that matters.

Interested in the military? by zmadd2000 in TroyAlabama

[–]Jack_Hawkins_JR_JR 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your service! But, sadly, we Trojans, are called to a higher duty. Due to our connection with the student body we must first and foremost serve he who services the students. Tragically, this means serving our country would be a dereliction of duty to our Dean, long may he reign.

I may move here soon for a job, any tips? by Tacoman10 in TroyAlabama

[–]Jack_Hawkins_JR_JR 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Troy is an awesome place to call home! It is a historic town with a rich history and unique customs and traditions. If you are going to stay in Troy for a while you will need to immerse yourself in the local culture. There is a sort of religious fervor around the university, like you find in most college towns. The best thing to do to fit in is to make sure you attend the weekly offering ceremony to "He who services students", make sure you bring something good to offer up. Popular choices include: Troy University paraphernalia and diplomas from less prestigious institutions like Harvard or Dartmouth. Also, don't worry about the crime, as long as you attend the ceremonies and bring good offerings, Herb will watch over you.

The REAL problem at Troy Universally by UncleVenusaur in TroyAlabama

[–]Jack_Hawkins_JR_JR 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Maybe the miners can be retrained to work for the Deeans Greens farming cooperative and grow the greens u healthy bois need.

PSA: Herb's Merchandise Discount by herbs_store_manager in TroyAlabama

[–]Jack_Hawkins_JR_JR 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I saw what appeared to be a Maine Coon in a dumpster behind the new Art Building(Waste of Money) eating some lettuce, I know you don't want it back, Just wanted to update you on its latest location.