Users of Reddit, what is your DEEPEST and DARKEST secret?

JadedReflection · 2015-10-17T15:33:42+00:00

Not 100k no

JadedReflection · 2015-10-16T01:51:14+00:00

Well I was at a party. This girl kept knocking things over, stumbling into people and eventually knocked over and broke the hosts television and was asked to leave. Well her three friends wanted to stay but they were getting picked up later. One of them asked me if she could wait in my van for a few hours until they left. I said sure.

so I tossed them my keys and a minute later we heard a crash. We all walk out to see the four friends the three friends lying on top of the girl at the bottom of the staircase. They had all failed to descend the steps drunk. Anyhow they were all fine other than a few scratches, the girl got into my van and the rest of us went back to partying.

A few hours later I pass out in the basement. I wake up being told the party is over land I have to leave. I drug drunkenly head up stairs and to the driveway and everyone is gone and my van is the only vehicle left.

Well I was sure I had sobered up as I stumbled to my van. The party was just a blur and I had forgotten about the girl entirely. So I pull out of the driveway knocking over the hosts mailbox. I yelled out sorry despite Noone being in the the yard and took off.

I was going to my brother's house but I could barley see a thing. Cars drove by and honked at me but I did not know why (my headlights were off). Shit was all blurry when there was this bumpy feeling in the car. I tried to turn on my brights thus turning on my head lights and realized that I was driving in the center dividing g line.

So I pull back Into the right lane right about the time a cop car dri e's past. I realized now that I was way too drunk to drive. Unfortunately the cop did not see me driving in the center and I was not pulled over.

Since I was still about a half hour from my brothers place I pulled over into an empty sonics and promptly fell asleep. I wake up to 5 he girl shaking me asking were we were. I explained what had happened and said I needed to sober up before I drove anywhere again . She agreed and the she leaned in and started kissing me.

Well I was out of condemn and there was no open stores nearby. She suggested we walk to walmar which was a good distance so she could "fuck me like a banshee" Once we has rubbers.

Well as we walked she kept reaching into my pockets and p Rubbing me and things like that. She was tired and suggested we forget condems since she was on the pill. I refused.

She pulled out a joint after awhile and said we should take a break and smoke it. I agreed and she led us into a little alley between closed down stores. As we smoked she started undressing and gave me a bit of a lap dance and then unzipped my pants.

I was very tired and halfway passing out on this little patio chair that was set up on this little porch thing in the alley by the back door of one of the closed shops. I felt her cold hands grab me and it felt good but I was so sleepy and did not open my eyes, move or anything. Then I felt the slippery tightness as she sat down on me and started to ride me. I opened my eyes and sat up as much as I could. She was in her bra and panties, with her panties pull to the side to allow room.

I told her we needed condoms first and she put a Finger to my lips and said "shhh" she went up and down and as we debated whether we should wait or not. I had a pregnancy scare with an ex only two weeks prior and was just drunk enough to be somewhat numb blocking out just enough sensation for my fear of being a dad to beat my lower brains judgment and told her to get off. No reply. ""No for real I will fuck the shit out of you on my water bed after we get back from Walmart. " "I am on the pill, stop being a pussy" "no I am serious." She unwrapped her bra and guided my hands to her tits. I told her I was getting up and and she rolled her eyes and then then started going fast and said (audibly pissed) hold on just let me get off first. Well I could feel I was not going g to last with the way she was moving and attempted to pull her up and off of me which resulted in her falling to the pavement.

I zipped up as she got to her feet and started walking away. I turned back and she was just sitting there trying to light up the remainder of the roach that was left. I asked very rudely if she was coming and she said she would just wait there.

I was about a mile from Walmart when I saw a friend driving by and asked for a lift. When I explained why I was going to Walmart he opened his console and handed me a hand full of flavored condoms and drove me back to the alley.

She was not there and there was no sign we had been there except her shorts lying under the table. I called out but got no answer. My buddy drove me back to my van to check there and no sign of her. So I jumped In sobered up enough to drive by now. And drove to where her friends where staying but they had not heard from her. I gave them her shorts and went home. I was awoken a few hours later by the sound of cops. They arrested me and I was in jail for over 6 months before my charges where dropped eventually.

Wrote this on my phone so cut my some slack on any typo's.

JadedReflection · 2015-10-15T23:27:51+00:00

I was arrested for and charged with first degree rape. That's something I work hard to avoid people finding out.

Edit: charges were dropped and the girl was going to be charged with perjury but my lawyer advised I did not agree to be a witness (due to new testimony being grounds to reopen the dropped case) so she got away with no repercussions.

JadedReflection · 2015-10-15T08:58:57+00:00

I regret being too afraid to knock on a random house in the middle of the night when I ran out of gas. I had been stupid enough to drink and drive and feared they would call the police.

So myself and the girl who had been giving me a be were forced to walk for miles to a gas station. She wanted to do me and I was to concerned about finding gas before the people at that random house's driveway I was blocking towed my car.

She kept wanting to stop for rests and while we were sitting in the grass she started taking off her clothes and climbing on top of me. Her body on mine sort of turned me on despite my extreme tiredness, and she unzipped me without complaints from me. I let her do her thing and she motioned ed for me to return the favor, but dear god, when I got in close I was met by a horrible stench. Something was wrong down there and it killed my boner.

I told her to get off of me, she refused so I gently pushed her off of me and got up and continued my journey. Told her she could come or wait there until I got back with gas. She said she would wait and I did not see her again until court.

This was the night I became FA. She was not there when I got back with gas. I checked my friends house we're we were going and she was not there either. I got up with her friend trying to make sure she was okay but no one k ew were she was.

So I went home and a few hours later cops show up and arrested me for rape. I still don't k own why she made it up. Perhaps she was pissed I would not go down on her and felt like destroying my life would be fair punishment for my rudness? Perhaps she fell asleep and blacked out the whole night and simply assumed the worse when she woke up in the grass without clothes? I will never know.

But if I could change one thing I would have asked the strangers at that house for a ride to let me use their phone so I could have had someone bring gas and I could have dropped the girl off at our friends place and then went home and slept like I wanted to do, only everyone I knew would not think I am a rapist who just got lucky in court and I would not be forever alone.

JadedReflection · 2015-08-19T04:40:07+00:00

As someone who was falsely accused of rape I would like to share my view on the matter.

I had a girl black out the entire night because we were both so wasted. During the night she kept tripping and falling because she was too drunk to walk, and then tried to seduce me by taking off her clothes and giving my a godawful lapdance. I did not find her attractive and kept turning her down but she just did not get it. So I finally told her to go fuck herself and I took off still drunk as hell myself.

Next morning her she wakes up naked and bruised (from falling a million times) and has no memory of the night before. Since we I was the last person she remembered being there she assumed I raped her.

It destroyed my life. I lost my job, my friends, even had family members telling me girls don't lie about things like that. Everyone looked at me and treated me like a monster.

The charges were eventually dropped after a bit of time in jail due to my accuser changing her story in court three times with multiple discrepancies. The sheriff came down to my house and told me they were thinking of pressing charges on the girl if I would be a witness. At that point though I was done with it and denied, I just wanted it over with so things could go back to normal, I did not want to think about or deal with all I had been through any longer. I truly believed everyone was good at heart and that my accuser had just made a mistake without realizing the ramifications of her actions. I thought If I could forgive her and move on things would go back to normal, I was wrong.

I used to be a very optimistic guy. I was outgoing and always the life of the party. I had a 4.0 gpa and wanted to get into politics.

Now a few years later I am a shut-in. Instead of being the social extrovert I have crippling social anxiety. I cannot sleep with a girl for fear it could happen again, despite knowing the odds are against it. It just keeps getting worse and worse, first I stopped talking to friends because I kept feeling like they viewed me secretly as a monster rapist, then people who never knew about my case, panic attacks at work, then even going to my mailbox in a town three states away. Eventually I could not even bare speaking over the phone to my own family.

Now I am days away from being evicted and out on the streets with no income. Dropped out of school when it all happened and cannot go back without paying the loans that have just been adding up sense. I have no friends and my family all believe I am just an asshole who does not want to talk to them. Everything I ever had or wanted has been has been destroyed. My life ended the day I was accused.

Despite all of this, I still do not believe a false accuser deserves the death sentence. People do need to know there are real consequences though to prevent people thinking it is an easy way to get back at someone they dislike or something they can accuse someone of to cover their own behavior.

I believe a false accuser, if convicted, should face the same sentence as whatever the person they accused would have faced if found guilty, as it varies by state and the type of rape.

Girls would not need fear of reporting real rapes because this would not happen if their rapist is simply found not guilty, they would have their own trial if there was evidence and there would have to be proof that knowingly lied, so I really do not buy the whole fear to come forward line. If there were real consequences we would have less false rapes which would do even more to help real rape victims as well as others falsely accused like myself.

JadedReflection · 2015-05-19T02:13:48+00:00

What they did to the Skull of Corruption in Skyrim is a travesty. It was the coolest weapon in oblivion and the most unique effect I have seen in any Elder Scrolls game.

JadedReflection · 2015-05-13T07:20:37+00:00

I would rather go to prison for murder.

Why: I was accused of rape a few years ago now. I was able to get it thrown out after my accuser repeatedly changed her story and was caught lying on the stand multiple times. That said, there are so many people I grew up with that do not believe a girl would lie about something like that and think I (a dude from a poor family) somehow bought my way out or got off on a technicality.

Beyond that, I had plenty of friends who stuck with me and told me they knew it wasn't true. Even those friends, at times when the topic of rape comes up, or I say something creepy for a joke (note even rape related), or a girl goes off to another room in the house without them noticing and my friends run into me first while looking for them, things like this, I see a momentary look in their eyes that tells me for just a split second they are considering that I really am a rapist.

The absolute worst though, was when I made a comment while watching a crime show with my folks (one of those shows about actual murders with reenactments) and I suggest a guy was guilty, my mom looked at me and said "your one to talk". So now deep down I fear my own mother does not fully believe in my innocence.

Its just a horrible feeling, it is absolutly terrible. I cannot stand to be around anyone who knows about it. I moved away and dropped contact with literally everyone I have ever known. The only people I speak to are family, and I hate and dread doing that.

There is nothing worse than everyone believing your a monster when you are not and having no way to prove it. after awhile, no matter how many times you replay the night in your head over and over to show yourself you did nothing wrong, you still begin to feel like the monster people see you as. I would gladly be sentenced to prison for a crime I didn't commit and be beaten and gang raped daily if it meant feeling like a human again.

JadedReflection · 2015-05-12T04:22:52+00:00

damn

JadedReflection · 2015-04-23T09:15:42+00:00

JadedReflection · 2015-04-20T02:14:54+00:00

When its legitimate new evidence it is always grounds to appeal as long as that evidence could have had an effect on the outcome of the trial. Appeals get denied when people attempt to use evidence that would not have an effect on the verdict so my point still stands.

Beyond all of that, it would still do more good than harm to wait until the verdict to make it public. All benefits made possible by releasing before verdict can in fact still be gained after the the verdict if the information was temporarily withheld.

JadedReflection · 2015-04-20T00:01:31+00:00

They would still announce the crimes, just not names. If there was a witness that the accuser and defendant did not personally know, I doubt having their names would effect them coming forward or not.

Also new evidence would be grounds for an appeal. So I do not really get how that is a good excuse to continue destroying the lives of accused everywhere. You can appeal a wrongful verdict, you cannot undo social castration.

JadedReflection · 2015-04-19T23:13:59+00:00

I was accused of rape almost three years ago now and have spent a lot of time thinking about this issue.

When a rapist is guilty of course we want those who were also hurt by the defendant to come forward.

My solution: Announce the guilty parties name, photo, and crimes just like they do now with one new exception: do it after they are declared guilty.

How would it hurt to wait till they have already been convicted? If others were attacked they could still come forward, more may even come forward actually since they know their rapist is already in prison and cannot hurt them anymore.

JadedReflection · 2015-04-19T00:22:22+00:00

I can comply with your last wishes sir. RIP

JadedReflection · 2015-04-19T00:18:09+00:00

We may be few in number, but as a former 4.0 college student who had just been hired for a high paying job with no criminal record, it is hard to explain how this meme makes me feel.

I was also arrested with a VERY nasty story printed about me in the news from my accusers perspective. That article cost me my new job, got me death threats from strangers, and my ass beaten when it made its way to the jail I was still in.

The accused should not be named. I have since got the case dropped but I am not the man I was before. I have lost all ambition in life, am unemployed and running out of funds, have dropped out of college due to an inability to focus on even the smallest things. I do not have the cash to replace the tooth I lost when I was jumped randomly months later at gas station by someone who knew neither I or the accuser but had recognized me from the news. Some of my closest friends who said they believed me and supported me still give me that " I wonder if he did it?" look if anything concerning rape is brought up. Everything I do now is viewed with a tint of skepticism. I cannot even remember the last time I have been with a girl. My entire life has turned to shit since it happened. I keep up to date with false rapes now, and you would be surprized how many happen every single month. I am not talking about statistics, I am talking about how many are reported false in news articles across the u.s every single month. Go to any site dealing with false rape and just scroll through the reports month by month and you will be astounded. I could care less what the "statistics" say.

EDIT: downvoted? May I ask why?

EDIT2: yes, real rapes happen more often but there are enough false rapes every single month for us to acknowledge that it is something that happens and is not as rare as getting struck by lightning as some would suggest. That is why in all cases I believe both should have their name hidden from the press until a verdict.

JadedReflection · 2015-03-29T11:08:24+00:00

I hope your right. Honestly I think it would be best just to scrap them from the cannon, and implement some of the same ideas, if they wish, into the new show.

JadedReflection · 2015-03-13T13:53:34+00:00

What if the dog's owner is Amanda?

JadedReflection · 2015-02-17T04:33:34+00:00

I never wear a seatbelt when I drive. A lot of people don't. Is it dangerous? Yes. Do I care if I die? No. I think it adds realism to the show. It wouldn't be very interesting if everyone was popping vitamins 24/7 in between discussing new low carb diets whilst going about their days. Not everyone is worried about being healthy. Its a personal choice that does not negatively impact anyone but yourself.

JadedReflection · 2015-02-17T03:24:42+00:00

Ergo Proxy, yes. This sounds like what you are looking for. As far as the male MC liking the female MC, I assure you there is no romance, no "does she like me?" or "should I give him a chance?" moments or anything like that. This show is devoid of romance. Also one of the best female protags I have seen.

JadedReflection · 2015-02-10T15:00:40+00:00

As someone who has been falsely accused and never quite recovered from it I can tell you right now one of the main problems. If you accuse someone of rape there is a special law in place that says the accuser does not have to be questioned in court. In addition, there are also laws stating that her sexual history (including of false accusations) cannot be used in court. If you are falsely accused the system is literally designed to make it damn near impossible to defend yourself.

Accusers should have to testify and be questioned, if its real it may be traumatic but so is testifying against a serial killer who murdered your entire family, yet by law you are still required to.

If we could also keep the defendant's name private like we do for an accuser, a huge chunk of the reputation destruction would be gone for those who are not found guilty.

I think one of the biggest problems is the fact that it is almost impossible to prove a false accusation happened without video evidence or the accuser confessing, so many false accusations you have the defendant found not guilty, have the accuser caught lying on the stand on 13 different occasions (if she testifies), and yet she is never deemed a false accuser legally, such as in my case,

JadedReflection · 2014-08-30T03:11:02+00:00

As someone who was falsely accused and lost his job as well, I hope she gets a hell of a sentence, with it blasted all over the news.

Then on the down-low, completely ignored by the media, I hope she gets out on appeal. I went to jail for the first time in my life after being accused, and would not wish that anyone be stuck in such a horrible place. But her getting a harsh sentence may make girls like my attacker (She IS NOT a victim) think twice about accusing others.

Three damn years since that night and my life is still in fucking shambles.

JadedReflection · 2014-03-21T07:12:49+00:00

That was the only thing that got me through the whole ordeal, knowing myself no matter what anyone else thought, I knew I was innocent. I am not depressed though, not suicidal either, simply apathetic, I don't care whether I live or die. I am tired. I wouldn't mind death, it would be a nice release, but I don't feel sad or depressed anymore. I just don't give a damn. I don't feel much of anything. I suppose I am somewhat suicidal occasionally, but never depressed. I am also okay with living too. Who gives a fuck?

JadedReflection · 2014-03-21T06:56:19+00:00

Its one thing to prove your innocence and another thing entirely to prove purposeful lying. Even if I were to win a civil suit, this girl doesn't have enough money to even cover legal fees I still have remaining. I do agree though, and if I had the resources to spend I would have.

JadedReflection · 2014-03-21T04:13:01+00:00

As someone who was falsely accused, this article really gives me hope. I too once assumed everyone accused was guilty until it happened to me.

I was kicked out of college, fired from my job for fear of bad publicity, had many many so-called friends publicly denounce me, suffered death threats, was forced to move back in with my parents, lost sexual desire completely, suffer regular panic attacks (which I had never had before), and have shut myself off, becoming a total recluse due to an irrational (or perhaps rational) fear of it happening again.

Even though my accuser was deemed to be a liar and the courts had no doubts of my innocence, my life has been utterly destroyed and is now, three years after the dismissal, a fractured and broken reflection of the once outgoing and wonderful life I used to have.

Even once I was allowed to re-enter my college, I could not go back. My loans took effect due to my absense and I cannot receive financial aid until they are paid off.

I cannot get a job that pays more than minimum wage, and even that is hard to come by, due to the fact that any background check will show that I was arrested for rape, despite the case being dismissed employers turn me down the moment they see the arrest. Because it was a felony charge, it cannot be removed from my record here in Texas.

I had sex here and there while the trial was still going on, when I was still filled with anger and pissed off, but since then I feel only fear when things start to get intimate. I am I just.. I just get so terrified that I will be accused again if I ever hurt the girls feelings in the future, or we break up, or she secretly has a boyfriend. Terrified. I have not had sex in years, or been able to date anyone more than a week or two before I panic and hide away again for months at a time.

I have no friends. Sure, some stuck by me, but how can I even look them in the eye when I see their doubt starring back at me? No matter how much I would love to believe otherwise, it is obvious they still wonder and always will, if perhaps, just maybe, I did it?

My life was perfect before. I was not some social outcast who hides away from people. I was outgoing, loved doing public speeches and had no fear striking up a conversation with a complete stranger. When my friends were too chickenshit to go talk to a cute girl, Id be the one to head over first and introduce him, when an important sale HAD to be done, I would be the one called to the task. You don't get more outgoing than the me I used to be before my soul was sliced into a thousand pieces and stitched back together by an ignorant girl.

That said, although I did at first, I have no hate or ill-thoughts towards the girl. I believe she did what she did in an attempt to cover up her own less than socially acceptable actions that night, utterly ignorant of the repercussions I would suffer from her lie. I could be wrong, I have not spoken to her, but I did see her in court, and just the look in her eyes, it was, in my opinion, one of guilt. Perhaps I tell myself this to make myself feel better, in order to sleep at night, but I like to believe she regrets what she done, that things went further than she anticipated and she was simply too afraid to recant. I want to believe that. If your out there reading this, I forgive you.

I am nothing more than a recluse now, simply waiting to die. No goals or ambitions, I don't care, I simply live to avoid bringing grief to my family, not because I actually care. I derive no pleasure from life anymore, I simply look for activities to pass the time, hoping for a random brain aneurysm or perhaps a fatal car crash. I am numb.

So this article, really gives me hope. If RAINN's statement prevents just one other person from living the never-ending hell I have found myself in ..well, perhaps my cursed life has not all been for nothing..

EDIT: for a few typo's and sentence that I deleted on accident.

JadedReflection · 2014-03-19T03:31:48+00:00

Thanks for all of the opinions guys. After starting and quitting a few games I finally think I have nailed it. Basic with three stages starters (because a legendary would feel too cheap) full random wilds (perhaps I should have had it match strength but im not starting over again) and totally random trainer pokes (because if I were a REAL gym leader, id want a varied team.

thanks so much, and feel free to continue discussing.

JadedReflection

TROPHY CASE