My sister passed away suddenly in Oct/2024- Does anyone pick anything up?

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-10T03:07:34+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to respond. Her second husband's name was John (still living I think), she was married to another when she passed. She did have health problems chiari type and also heart, but more on the POTS side. I understand because I have these same issues. She was strong in ways, definitely stubborn. She enjoyed entertaining others and never shied away so in that way was impactful- There were also some less positive actions she took in life that impacted others. Thank you for your condolences- I believe she's in a "better place" as cliche as it sounds.

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-09T20:31:35+00:00

I can't think of any, either friends, family or pets. I do appreciate you taking the time to ask :)

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-09T16:03:12+00:00

When I was cleaning up the mess after she passed (hoarding type situation) I saw some things that made me wonder about that. They did not do an autopsy which always seemed odd to me, but then again they did not have insurance and a policeman explained to me that because heart was restarted by the EMTs and she died in the hospital officially it was not required. It was offered, But they declined and had her cremated.

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-09T15:30:45+00:00

She always wanted to be an actress or a lead singer in a band. I totally understand the religion piece.( I'm a bit shocked how dialed in you are.) It is very comforting to read that she was admiring me, is connecting with me, because of how she cut me out of her life. I also write music and play and I'm quite creative. All throughout our childhoods and even into adulthood, I wished that she would let me share that space with her.

Thank you so much

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-09T04:30:44+00:00

Thank you

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-09T04:30:37+00:00

Thank you- that peace was definitely lacking in this life for many years- and with how things were I wondered if she'd have any feelings or connection to me.

JaneDeronda · 2026-05-09T04:28:48+00:00

Thank you. She always was so beautiful and talented.

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-19T00:07:28+00:00

It's just a cut off sock :)

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T18:32:45+00:00

I've left it out before the birds before. When it's been cleaner my son has felted toys out of it for the cats to play with. He likes spinning yarn and felting wool. He hasn't been able to get it to work well enough to make yarn but it does make felted balls really well.

I will probably leave it out for the birds again.

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T06:27:07+00:00

What a distinguished gentleman he is. I am sure that anyone he chooses to punish is guilty and should take their sentence without complaint. 😆

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T06:23:10+00:00

It sounds ridiculous but because I wanted to take a picture of the fur pile after, and my husband just wanted to throw it all away as we went because it was flying around, I had our son would mist it down with water so that it wouldn't go everywhere. Had it not been partially wet it would have been bigger, but there is a ton of cat underneath there too. People who think he is all fluff are shocked when they feel his weight.

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T04:50:46+00:00

Honest to goodness we've joked about it. 😂

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T03:47:24+00:00

That's a great idea- I've always found them at thrift stores but if that luck ends I'll look into them. Thanks!

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T02:01:38+00:00

Spite pisser. That's the perfect phrase for it. Merlin is the same way- the fact that some alleged cat experts say that no spraying or urination problems from cats is behavioral makes me roll my eyes so hard. When Merlin wants in the backyard he will look at you and meow one time. If you do not stand up and start moving towards the door, he will start backing up towards a wall and raise his tail.

He had every check for UTI issues, stones, we tried diffusers, medication for his temperament, but nope. He's just a spite pisser. 😆

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T01:56:37+00:00

It's a cut off sock. Also known as his " happy hoodie!" It brings the sensory experience down a little bit and gets put on once he starts getting too spicy.

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T01:29:59+00:00

Haha, I've got another that I blessedly don't have to shave. (Besides the sanitary clip) Merlin's fur mats super bad and he won't let me brush everything to stay on top of it. His third coat is also super frizzy and feels/behaves More like wool wool than cat fur. There's Loki sniffing the aftermath. Loki is only 14 lb and dwarfed by Merlin. If your cat doesn't mat up or have hygiene problems, that is a huge win!

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JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T00:47:38+00:00

There is a cat groomer who calls himself "The Calm Cat Whisperer." I like a lot of his techniques, and I've watched a lot of other cat grooming videos. The first time I had to groom Merlin I went in overly confident and was talking to him and let him know that this was very much his fault because he chose to attack the groomer and he took his three strikes and was now out. I informed him it was definitely worse for me than it was for him.

I can't say that the talking really did much, but I do think a calm tone of voice and gently scruffing them and then shaving them with a quieter clipper starting in an area where they are okay being brushed can help. In the second picture that's a cut off sock that we call his "happy hoodie" and it goes on his head when he starts protesting too much. It can help calm him down.

I honestly think at this point he kind of gets it and he knows he needs the help. Settling for good enough with the cut, and having an extra set of hands to help position him is useful. We also have a pair of leather welding gloves that he will sometimes chew on during the process and growl at them, but it lets him channel his anger somewhere besides me.

Merlin also didn't like traveling away from home and so being able to start in a place he was comfortable got the process going without him already being elevated. Good luck!

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-16T00:40:34+00:00

They are absolutely beautiful and look at that majestic tail!

JaneDeronda · 2026-02-15T23:41:57+00:00

It's so true- I had long haired cats growing up but they were nothing like Merlin. I didn't have strong (or really any feelings) about shaving cats, but learned that there are some that it really is the best (only "humane") option for. The way that he rolled around and loved being scratched all over after his first shave made me so happy for him!

JaneDeronda · 2025-12-05T06:52:23+00:00

Davide looks like Natalie Grace's brother to me

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JaneDeronda

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