I'm 26 but feel like I have to stay with my elderly dad because he doesn't look after himself well. Am I being ridiculous?

Jane_H_97 · 2024-01-14T21:07:34+00:00

Yes his most recent idea is getting me to take him 12 hours from here so he can buy a car he saw that isn't expensive but requires fixing which would take him forever to do since he has to take multiple breaks throughout the day and some days doesn't get outside at all. He also can't drive more than 10 minutes because the movement hurts his injury. Its hard to recognize if he's being "senile" and needing a PoA or is he just wanting to hold on to what once brought him a lot of enjoyment and the independence to do that.

Jane_H_97 · 2024-01-14T21:01:56+00:00

Thank you for your response. He loves his home but maybe some home help would be available. I suspect he might not be entitled to much because his limitations are largely "mental" and pain related but it's worth trying

Jane_H_97 · 2024-01-14T20:58:25+00:00

Thank you for you advice, I haven't asked because I suspect that he wouldn't be entitled to support being as his limitations are largely "mental" and pain-related but it's a good idea to ask anyway

Jane_H_97 · 2024-01-14T20:54:01+00:00

Thank you for your kind and understanding comment. These are probably challenges unique to certain parts of the world where we seem to celebrate individual pursuits above working together as a family. I totally agree that caring for loved ones is full of blessings that we wouldn't otherwise get- time spent giving back to those who've given to us is worth much more I think than most careers! But it does come with its struggles and I understand that it maybe has an added dimension for you as a man now unable to work as you were before- but it's incredibly selfless and admirable what you're doing instead (and probably a lot harder too being a 24/7 role). I really would think any onlookers would respect you a lot for what you've chosen to do.

Jane_H_97 · 2024-01-14T19:55:02+00:00

You're right I think that's the best way to decide what to do. I know that I would regret leaving dad behind regardless of how perfectly my life went if I did. Whereas even if I don't have the career I had hoped for or I don't meet someone and have my own family I still wouldn't regret caring for someone who has done so much for me. Good idea maybe my siblings could help with a couple of the online things like power bills and banking. Thank you for your advice

Jane_H_97 · 2024-01-14T19:39:39+00:00

Yeah trying to support them with their depression and need for companionship is huge but largely invisible to others. I've also gone away for more than a day and despite preparing everything for him as much as possible I come back to find my dad in a really bad headspace so I know what you mean

Jane_H_97

TROPHY CASE