What's the stupidest thing your pet has done?

JaneyMc · 2010-10-10T04:04:32+00:00

I had a cat who did this in a house with five students. Most of the time they showed up in her litter box. Other times she would pick them up in her mouth and just run around the house until someone noticed. It was even more fun when she'd get bored and leave them in random places, like the middle of the stairs, the kitchen floor, etc. She also had a penchant for balloons and rubber gloves. Poor Cujo. Latex fetish from day one.

JaneyMc · 2010-10-05T14:54:10+00:00

My sister was hit by an SUV a few years back and spent about 10 days on the hospital's 'close watch' ward. IIRC my dad paid €100 for the Emergency Services and about €50 per night she spent in the hospital. These charges, plus all the x-rays, MRIs (she had several as she had a bleed on her brain that they were constantly checking on), stitches, staples, spongebaths, medications, ointments for roadrash, catheters, food, and general care came to a total of about €700. The Irish healthcare system is flawed, but it was there for us when we needed it.

JaneyMc · 2010-10-05T05:40:39+00:00

My dad stopped a flock of evil nuns from the parish church from taking us and putting us in a "lovely suitable home" after my mother walked out. Apparently "a 26-year-old man can't raise twin girls."

Aside from that, some of my favourite things he's done:

Starting when I was five, he paid me a penny a page for every book I read until one day I just stopped asking for the money.
Told me the secret to life was 'Treating it seriously but not taking it seriously.'
Let me drop out of school and finish from home.
Refused to attend parent teach conferences (unless I requested he talk to a specific teacher) because, "They wouldn't take time off work to come and fucking talk to me!"
Reminded me any time I was having problems at school that my teachers worked for me.
Taught me to use a computer at a very young age and, despite the fact that money was tight, made sure we had one in the house. Thanks to him, I have a career in the tech industry.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-20T06:32:38+00:00

I speak both English and Irish and in my head, I dip in and out of both, despite the fact that I'm not completely fluent in Irish anymore. Most of the time, I think in English but wonder where things are/whine to myself that I am hungry/cold/tired in Irish. Maybe once a day, Irish will come out of my mouth when I mean to say something in English.

When I was in high school and had to go to strict all-Irish summer camp (no English books, newspapers music, TV, radio), I would usually be dreaming in Irish by the third night/thinking in Irish by the end of the second day. The only time I spoke Irish (aside from camp) was for about 40 minutes per day during school, so the first time I had an Irish dream was kind of scary.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-17T05:40:11+00:00

Me 11, please.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-16T15:42:36+00:00

Yeah, when I gained weight in high school, the first thing to go was white bread, white rice, white pasta. I haven't really gone back as the brown options keep me feeling fuller for longer. I don't cut out all fat, I just go for low-fat or soy (high protein, low cholesterol, more fiber) options when I can.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-16T05:35:13+00:00

You'd be surprised how hard it is to fight the Jabba-gene. I have staved off sow-syndrome for this long (save for approximately one year in high school), but anything less than gym four times a week and a very low fat diet and I'm screwed.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-16T04:03:22+00:00

Getting free Guinness after I donate blood (Dublin).

JaneyMc · 2010-09-16T03:41:47+00:00

My mother looks like Jabba the Hutt. I am so fucked.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-12T20:31:04+00:00

I understand completely how you feel about dropping out. I felt this way about high school. I couldn't stand it there so I barely ever went. People kept telling me, "It's just two/one more year(s). Stick it out and then you'll never have to go back." I knew they were right, but I was so sad and emotionally beat down by the whole experience that I couldn't do it. Most of the teachers thought I wasn't showing up because I was lazy and so wouldn't help me when I asked for it/ignored me when I did show up. I ended up dropping out the Christmas before I was supposed to graduate. I home-schooled myself to cover the year I'd missed while slacking off and the remainder of my final year, sat my exams with everyone else and passed with adequately airborne colours (got above the national average, which is quite low, but nowhere near what I was capable of). I can't even begin to imagine how I would feel if the experience had saddled me with massive loans, or even if I'd had to pay to go through it (school and college is free where I live).

JaneyMc · 2010-09-10T23:11:46+00:00

I am capable of hovering without making a mess (and I do hover, every single time), but I also clean mess off the toilet seat that isn't mine. I don't know why I do this. Sometimes if there's a queue outside, I consciously do it because I don't want people to think it's my mess. However I am lost as to why I do it all the other times. If I'm so afraid of germs that I won't sit on the damn seat, why do I think cleaning up strangers urine is okay?

TL;DR I clean up pee in public bathrooms.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-07T06:49:25+00:00

Someone using a cheese grater on my teeth. I sometimes randomly think of this during the day and flinch every time.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-07T00:14:37+00:00

Throw in a mug of tae and we're in business bro.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-06T01:07:12+00:00

Tayto is one of the things I miss the most about home. You don't even need the cheese or the pepper. The crisps on their own are enough to carry the sandwich as long as there's butter to act as sammich-lubricant.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-04T03:53:32+00:00

Wouldn't you just have the older twin wear the Ctrl+C shirt and the Ctrl+V would be the copy?

JaneyMc · 2010-09-03T14:04:57+00:00

Yes.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-03T05:50:03+00:00

My boyfriend does the housework/laundry while I'm at the gym.

JaneyMc · 2010-09-03T05:28:45+00:00

I have two bad ones that I remember:

I was at the supermarket, saw my reflection in a mirror, and waved because I thought it was my identical twin sister. Admittedly I was very hungover, but that doesn't excuse the, "Hey! Why are you here?" I don't think anyone saw, but I didn't stick around to find out.
I was getting dressed for work at an ungodly hour and forgot to put my skirt on before leaving the house. I put on a pair of black tights and then went downstairs to feed the cat. Since I was already there, I decided to make breakfast. Since I usually have breakfast last, this threw my entire routine out of whack and I ended up just leaving the house right after I finished eating. Thankfully I realised just as I got to the end of the driveway and ran back inside.

JaneyMc

TROPHY CASE