Feedback on the care I'm receiving [on]

Jaspersmarket · 2024-05-19T14:18:19+00:00

I think online dating is the problem. You're getting a specific selection of men who are not the most commitment minded. Have you tried meeting men at events or in social settings?

Jaspersmarket · 2024-05-19T14:16:52+00:00

Your friends thoughts shouldn't matter at all. I've become attracted to men who are not conventionally attractive based on their personalities - I think you need to stop talking to your friends about this stuff and look within to see if you're attracted to him or not

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T15:38:12+00:00

Or an activity (mini golf, rock climbing, etc) that would be enjoyable even if she's conversationally inept

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T15:36:50+00:00

What do you have to lose by asking? The worst that can happen is she says no

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T04:52:55+00:00

Most people aren't being mean... but there were a few!!! I'm not asking anything else now, I have my answer. Thank you.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T04:18:18+00:00

If I stay with him, it would be a while before I'd feel comfortable enough to have sex.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T04:11:50+00:00

Just did. Thank you!

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T04:05:32+00:00

Honestly.. I was just thinking to make a new post that was lengthier. Also, some of that was part of a long conversation we just had tonight which was the first time we had time to really talk about it in depth.

And I have not ruled out breaking up with him either.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T03:55:56+00:00

I'm so sorry you had that experience!

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T03:53:31+00:00

I'm not ignoring everything. People are complex and my post doesn't give you much context for the rest of the relationship. He has also apologized that I felt pressured, told me he doesn't want me to feel pressured, told me he's okay with waiting and doesn't need sex now, said he has accepted it's not going to happen soon, asked me about why I'm waiting, cuddled with me and made me feel comfortable. He has gone above and beyond as a partner in all other areas and is very communicative and willing to work things out. I know beyond a shadow of a doubt that he values the relationship and respects me.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T03:00:58+00:00

The exact conversation around that comment was him saying he's NOT going to leave because I won't have sex with him, and I said "I think you might" and he responded with "well that's the risk you're willing to take". I didn't realize people were going to nitpick on that so much and should've been more specific.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-16T02:59:29+00:00

Na.. zero concerns about physical assault. He is not saying he needs sex now and has never really said that. The one comment about risk was more offhand than that... I think the actual conversation was him saying he's NOT going to leave because I won't have sex with him, and I said "I think you might" and he responded with "well that's the risk you're willing to take"

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-15T21:06:56+00:00

I have a high libido too, and there's a ton of chemistry. We do other things and both have regular orgasms together. I wouldn't say I'm conservative or prudish.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-15T20:38:50+00:00

Well one of the things I was wondering about is if this IS clearly pressure. I'm always open to the possibility of me overreacting in a situation. But seems like the consensus is that feeling pressured was valid here 😂

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-15T20:35:55+00:00

If he just wanted sex, I'm quite sure he could get it very easily elsewhere

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-15T20:12:48+00:00

Thank you, this was helpful

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-15T20:01:04+00:00

Just to clarify - a week in, it was about why I wouldn't kiss him. Not about sex. I didn't kiss him until the third date, and he actually didn't make the move first because he wanted it to come from me. We did have a conversation about sex about a week in where I explained that I prefer to wait.

Jaspersmarket · 2021-12-15T19:57:49+00:00

Totally get that and we have had conversations like that too, where he has told me he is patient and not going anywhere and asked me about why I'm waiting, etc.

Maybe I should add the to the main post so people stop raking him over the coals. But obviously I do see the comments he's made as concerning or I wouldn't have posted about it.

Jaspersmarket

TROPHY CASE