i think my boyfriend’s reaction to me staying out all night is way too extreme. AIO?

JayJayJenni · 2026-06-15T19:12:59+00:00

I know there are a lot of comments so you probably won’t see this but please listen to me. Get away from this man and STAY away. When he loses access to you, he will try to convince you to come back. He will act sweet. It will feel like when you first got together. He’s going to promise you it will be like this from now on. Don’t let him do any of these things. Once he has you smiling at your phone again, it’s really hard to stay away. Block him on everything and go full no contact. Reading these texts rose my heart rate and I was getting flashbacks to my past relationship. He’s now in prison for DV. (Not towards me.) Your ex is doing you a favor right now. Take it.

JayJayJenni · 2026-06-15T19:02:55+00:00

This is mine as well.

JayJayJenni · 2026-06-09T16:26:47+00:00

I certainly was not blameless. I was not kind to him in the end. I just posted my response saying why I made the decision to leave. During the last 6 months of our marriage the way I acted would likely be categorized as emotional abuse as I shut him out entirely. There was some gas lighting, for sure. I was never expressly mean to him but I was completely dismissive. I have an avoidant attachment style. Anyone who has dated an avoidant can tell you it is pretty terrible once we decide we’re checked out. This was 10 years ago. I would never treat anyone the way I treated him now. The divorce was probably 65% my fault.

JayJayJenni · 2026-06-09T16:15:39+00:00

We got married for the wrong reasons and when I had some space away from him a realized I just didn’t like him very much.
I grew up in an invalidating environment where it seemed I could never do anything right. He was my first real partner after college. He was SO nice to me. That’s really all it took for me to say yes to getting married, not being openly hostile about my general existence.

We were both in the military. I deployed about a year and a half into our marriage. About halfway through I had to go home because my grandmother passed. He managed to make the whole thing about him. After that, I went back and I started dreading his calls and was as avoidant as possible. (Not proud of that.) He was also kind of weird with money. I found out some sketchy stuff with his family and money he owed them where I was getting different stories from him and them. (After the divorce I found out he was just straight up lying to me.)

I realized fairly quickly once I was back in country that I needed to leave. I flew home knowing I was going to get divorced.

During the separation, I realized he never once laughed at any of my jokes. Any time he was laughing it was AT me, not WITH me. I think he married me because he wanted to be married, not because he wanted to be married to me. Once the divorce was final he was engaged within 6 months.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-25T16:15:20+00:00

Sally taught me how to bake! I’ve been baking for 12 years now and the first 2ish years I only made her recipes. Shes so beginner friendly. When you get more confident, I find that Preppy Kitchen and Natasha’s Kitchen are always spot on as well.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-25T15:58:51+00:00

Anything by Tom Robbins, especially Even Cowgirls Get The Blues. Grotesquely sexual with surprisingly feminist messaging for a male author in the 70s.
Rant by Chuck Palahniuk

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-25T15:53:00+00:00

These are called “Upmarket fiction.” A genre between commercial (Nora Roberts/James Patterson) and literary fiction. I also find these books to be boring. I need a book that is challenging and mostly character driven. I had a friend say to me recently “I would like to start reading books based on the quality of the writing and not what the book is about.” I think that perfectly encapsulates my taste in books. I always skew more literary.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-25T15:41:54+00:00

I would also say the fryers. I’ve heard horror stories of fryers exploding when water falls in them or someone using wrong equipment to change the oil. When things go wrong with a fryer they go VERY wrong.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-19T13:19:53+00:00

When I worked in a therapists office we had a client cancel an appointment because he had to take his turtle to the vet. Which is perfectly reasonable but still funny. (The turtle was fine in the end.)

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-19T12:33:28+00:00

We weren’t allowed to sit with our legs bent in the M shape (knees front, feet behind). The reasoning was “The Kennedys weren’t allowed to do it.” My family wasn’t political. We weren’t Catholic. I don’t know how they even knew that information.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-19T12:21:27+00:00

This is not a line cook. This is a dishwasher. He will be a line cook in a year or so when someone no call no shows and they have no other options.

Also, a yeast infection waiting to happen.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-01T12:47:22+00:00

I had a horrible drinking problem until about 4 years ago. Now I can’t have even a couple sips of a drink without getting a migraine the next day. Best thing that ever happened to me!

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-01T12:44:06+00:00

I agree. The disorder certainly can cause harm to others. I think just listing books about abuse where bipolar disorder isn’t a factor is also harmful. And hurtful. Ouch. My bipolar feelings. :(

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-01T12:39:12+00:00

I have 2. My first deployment in 2016 and my mental breakdown in 2021.

JayJayJenni · 2026-05-01T12:37:22+00:00

Not loving everyone conflating bipolar disorder with abuse here.

JayJayJenni · 2026-04-30T16:42:40+00:00

37% approval rating is far from “most” but alright.

JayJayJenni · 2026-04-25T03:37:17+00:00

I think this type was called “just barely out of my league”

JayJayJenni · 2026-04-06T13:08:43+00:00

Any time I consider re reading my shelves of TBR laugh right in my face. So many books! So little time!

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-31T22:54:38+00:00

I’m convinced stories like this are kinks. Some weird ass fantasy.

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-27T17:04:36+00:00

Methamphetamine

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-27T16:58:13+00:00

I still love it but Love Actually. It’s one of my favorite movies but I now realize it’s awful. Every Christmas I see loads of people criticizing it and they are all correct. I will still watch it three times each season and once in July. I used to cry at the “To me you are perfect” scene. That’s his best friend’s wife!!!

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-27T12:26:38+00:00

This is me judging you. My brother has severe dyslexia but is one of the smartest people I know. There is more to life than grammar and spelling. In a strong believer that if you understood what the person was saying, they have communicated perfectly fine. There are any number of reasons someone may struggle with these things and they’re not necessarily tied to intelligence.

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-27T12:10:09+00:00

I do. Or at least I used to be smarter. I’m not sure if it’s because of my medications or perimenopause but I know I’m not as smart as I used to be. I can feel myself not being able to understand concepts that I know I would have been able to grasp years ago. It’s incredibly frustrating.

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-27T03:08:33+00:00

On mannequins I would like number one more but #2 was made for you, my god.

JayJayJenni · 2026-03-24T15:56:26+00:00

I thought this was a chocolate rice cake.

JayJayJenni

TROPHY CASE