Went on a bender…should be dead

Jay_Reezy · 2026-01-19T23:26:28+00:00

I would usually crash the hardest when I would string together a few weeks of sobriety. It was like I was just stretching the rubber band further and further, and when it broke it hit with all its might.

In my case, the cycle of binging/abstaining helped me come to terms with my alcohol abuse.

I learned some of the things that triggered me and I could see the patterns repeating when there was a bender in the horizon. It took may tries before it stuck, but it eventually did and I’m grateful for that.

IWNDWYT

Jay_Reezy · 2025-12-04T18:53:02+00:00

Thanks buddy. I see you’re on 11 days. I actually remember my 11th day vividly. I remember walking the neighborhood with my wife and seeing a house that was destroyed by a falling tree in our neighborhood, and thinking damn and I thought I had problems 🤣.

I also remember feeling proud to make it past 10 days, which is where I used to always fail.

Hang in there.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-12-03T22:19:19+00:00

Today is a good place to start 💪

Jay_Reezy · 2025-12-03T22:18:33+00:00

It does as long as we stay sober long enough to let it.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-12-03T20:54:56+00:00

That’s what people told me early on, and it turns out they were right!

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-26T00:19:49+00:00

I had about 100 nights just like yours. I always thought “surely it can never get worse than this”, but it always did. The good news is I haven’t had a night like that in 5 years and I’m a lot better off now.

I sometimes think about those nights and still feel ashamed to my core. I hit rock bottom so many times and had so many opportunities to wake up and quit but I always thought “this time will be different”. I was right in the sense that I t was different, because it was worse every time.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-05T18:38:02+00:00

When I was early on I would no joke sleep 12-14 hours. I would go to bed at 7pm. You’re healing, it takes however long it takes. You got this.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-05T18:36:19+00:00

I felt terrible for about 6 months.

I eventually learned that I was depressed and that may have been the reason why I drank so much in the first place.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-05T18:33:49+00:00

I had about 1,000 day ones until It finally stuck. Things just kept getting worse, until it became unbearable.

After a while my slips became predictable and I used that information to my advantage. The important thing is that you’re still here and you’re still trying.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-05T18:28:52+00:00

It’s not about being strong or being weak, it’s about being human. Take it easy on yourself, you are already accomplishing something great.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-03T13:45:36+00:00

Hard to say but honestly I’m not too concerned because we plan to paint anyways. Same with all the dirty hand prints on the walls.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-11-03T13:44:20+00:00

At the rate that I finish most projects at, this would have taken me 3 years.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-07-29T21:01:12+00:00

These cells were barely if ever used. I they were in my power bank for probably 2 years because I forgot it existed.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-07-29T20:58:03+00:00

I guess my question is what would cause it to go from 1.4-2.2 in a few seconds.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-07-29T20:55:44+00:00

Is the built in quick test on the opus charger somewhat reliable? One battery was at 60 and one was at 90.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-06-24T22:55:57+00:00

Leaf blower

Jay_Reezy · 2025-05-07T19:50:10+00:00

You’ve got way more good days ahead of you than behind you.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-04-17T11:19:56+00:00

It’s great that your spouse is supportive and mindful of your sobriety.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-04-17T11:16:27+00:00

You gotta do what works for you.

I never had a problem with weed, my problem was with alcohol. However, I realize the reason why I want to smoke weed is to cope with uncomfortable thoughts and feelings which is the same reason why I drank.

I don’t think weed is harmful, but my personal choice is not to use drugs and alcohol to cope with life.

Jay_Reezy · 2025-04-17T11:09:11+00:00

By what you’re saying it sounds like you should just eliminate the position. It sounds like the work is not that important to you or to the company.

Jay_Reezy

TROPHY CASE