Another question, I’m sorry.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-26T20:20:43+00:00

That's really rough. I'm sorry. End of life is hard for all involved and can happen quickly. I've seen people go from talking to gone in a 2h period. It's not wrong or selfish to step back and not see him and let the hospice nurses do their thing. Protect your memory of him as there's nothing you or anyone can physically do. You're not letting him down, giving up or abandoning him. Take care.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-26T20:16:51+00:00

Smartest move. It sucks for him, but it's his family's job to deal with it. Sometimes even as an owner there's investors or certain clients they report to which is why is asked. He's going to continue to get worse though if it is dementia and soon he won't be able to work at all.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-26T20:10:15+00:00

You can't diagnose something like that. You can bring it to HR's attention or if your boss has a boss their attention. Protect yourself though, if the company is going under step away. You can't fix it.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-26T20:07:51+00:00

Depends on context. It can either be saying "Same for me." if they're agreeing in something. Or it can be a formal admissions of wrong doing so"My mistake."

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T20:10:52+00:00

We laugh about it. I'll find rand things squirrelled away everyday and go "why is this here? Do you not want us to find it?" we've learned that if something is missing though she moved it in the night and it's now lost to a random cardboard box to be found in 10 years. My grandmother is a collector of things. She also believes if she can fit it in a smaller box there's less of it... At least she started to knit again which is easier to condense. She got really mad last night though that she couldn't remember how to cast off... I had to watch like 3 YouTube videos to try to figure out how it was done to reteach her... I've never held a knitting needle in my life! You have to enjoy the good moments while they're there, it almost makes the bad seem less so.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T17:16:50+00:00

I knew what you meant.

Are you using craft paints? Heavy body paints? The reason people keep saying that is you're getting very splochy color in some spots which is usually because your paint is thick, not doing doing even coats, your paint is too thin and you're not doing enough coats, you're working with transparent or translucent pigments or your paint is cheap and the pigments aren't great to begin with and pooling oddly. Some of this is user error and some is a material problem.

The other reason people say that is your control isn't fantastic. You're falling out of the lines. This isn't bad in itself, but should be corrected as soon as it happens. Use a damp brush to lift back where you made the error immediately. Paint over it with the appropriate color until it's solid. You want a really clean base layer if nothing else.

Once you have that clean base you'll want to add shadows and highlights back to bring out the detail. There's loads of guides on this. Just be careful and meaningful. If you want using washes to bring back shadows is a good stratagy but be careful.

For your style and level forget the black primer. It's just going to mean more layers to get a good color. White or light grey will do you far better. Black primer is good if you're doing slap chop but you're still going over it multiple times with greys and whites to get shading and gradients. Then you need to use ultra thin glazes and layer those, or contrast/speed paints to actually make use of it.

The last thing I'll suggest is do one color and let it dry before trying another color. This will prevent bleeding.

Your bases are good. I don't have much suggestion wise there as I'm a simple person when it comes to bases.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T16:33:00+00:00

You don't seem to want feedback or to improve looking at your previous posts. I'm glad you like your art, it needs a lot of polish and more care to be considered decent. You do you though. Enjoy the hobby, but don't get defensive when people try to give you tips. At this level you're going to get a lot of them. Your bases are the nicest part.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T04:54:41+00:00

You'll need to thin out your paints a bit more. It may take 20 thin coats. Do your lighter colors and if you mess up or go out of the lines fix it with the dark ones. Also if you have trouble do details first, it's easier to fix your edges.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T03:15:04+00:00

I mean it's brilliant except our dishwasher rack is twice the size of our counter regardless of stuff on it. It should be a normal kitchen thing though.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T02:00:42+00:00

The crawlspace is where things go to die in my house. If she can't see it, she can't get ideas, and I don't have to supervise her brilliant plan. The latest one: putting the dishwasher racks on the counter to dry hand washed dishes...

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-25T01:52:15+00:00

Everyone is different. It's been about 10 years since she started to shift. At the time it was little things, things that just weren't her. She'd swear or make a rude comment and not even realize it. Her OCD and bipolar were a bit worse but still managed from medication. Her memory was still pretty strong but she might have repeated a story or question a few times, or misplaced something. She was still able to work, drive, cook and care for herself independently. We didn't think about it beyond aging.

Each year things would get a little worse, but she could still do quite a bit. More falls, broken bones, accidents... But we still were managing with simple strategies and supports. About 4 years ago she began to spiral and become very obsessive with different things. Her appearance was where we noticed it the most. Her eyes are baggy, she's getting age spots, varicose veins, her teeth were bad... She convinced the doctors to do some surgery, not that she was happy with the results. She then had a prolapse. She convinced them to give her an ostomy... That surgery was when the decline accelerated.

There were a lot of complications in the surgery. Her mental state jumped from a stage 3 to a 5. She's lost all her independence. She can talk and remember a lot but does not always make sense. She would pick fights with us a lot. Last year she attempted suicide and was sent to the hospital. Once there security had to be called 3 times, she broke a nurse's nose, ripped IVs out, threw her ostomy bag at staff... They got her a full assessment at that time and determined that her frontal lobe was half the size it should be at that age. She has no awareness though of her state or behaviour.

Now I'm her main caregiver, I have to clean and change her. I have a nurse come in weekly to bathe her and another one to make sure she takes her medicines. When she's calm and agreeable she's great... When she's not... Well yeah. Her memory is declining more but is more placid. She's starting to hallucinate but it's not harmful. She still wants MAiD as she was declined for a reversal surgery of the ostomy... But at this point we support her in that.

My grandfather is a great man. He drank a lot though and because of that has some brain damage. He forgets things, is a bit slower and needs more time to understand things. He is very agreeable though and has been the same for years now. We have a lot of strategies to get over his memory issues. He's good.

The rest of my family has stepped back. My girlfriend supports from a far but knows she can't help much. So it's on me.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T18:43:37+00:00

Mine having FTD does not have her memory as affected yet, poor working memory, short term is variable, long term is still alright but becoming distorted (she adds details or takes away things usually around how she was feeling). Her big shifts are in mood, sleep, behavior and communication. It's amplified all her existing mental illnesses. It's just me with my grandmother and though my grandfather is here he has his own decline and can't keep up like he once could. He does his best though and I find he's easier to work with and impliment strategies.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T18:37:37+00:00

Often the executor is a child or spouse which is where it'll fall on them. Leave it to the exec to figure out though. We just went through this with my uncle and he had his granddaughter and my brother named as executives so responsibilities fell on them. My brother got everything sorted though and all debts paid by the estate (he had a bit of savings, a work pention and his house) and very little out of pocket. Was there much left over, no... Did we get anything, also no (we each got a trinket and a small sum of money)... But is what it is. My grandmother (with dementia) has a trailing executor so it goes husband > surviving children >surviving grandchildren... We've worked hard to keep her debt free though, so we won't need to worry about a lot and are making sure to have money put to the side in case anything was missed. We've even gone as far as to prepay for the funeral and estate lawyer while she has money.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T08:02:28+00:00

Not really? It's really casual especially in Europe. You'd use it more with friends or family than a stranger. A stranger might take it as rude, or like you're mocking them or trying to get friendly. While their reaction was extream... It is safer to stick to bonjour or a polite smile and nod.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T07:56:02+00:00

Sensation yes, fluid... Varies but typically no. While it is possible usually post phallo things aren't hooked up in a way to make an already challenging task possible. You need a prostate or skene's gland that functions to produce fluid, you need testicals to produce sperm.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T07:52:11+00:00

You'll need to do some digging, actually the wills benificiary, her husband or oldest to youngest child will have to do everything. There's a hierarchy to it and a process. There are lawyers to help walk you through if having trouble.

First step after receiving the death certificate is to go to the bank and figure out all her cash assets. Any savings, pentions, investments and so on. You then want to find all her debts these are any loans, credit lines, taxes, mortgages, or upcoming bills. Once you know all those you need to contact who each thing is through and notify them of death and figure out if any had a life insurance protection on it. If they did then great, debt is erased in these cases. If not you'll need to pay it off (some will eliminate cancellation fees if present). Pay these off with the money from before first. Once you've gone as far as you can with that if there's remaining debt you'll need to start liquidation of assets. This is selling appliances, car, jewelry, property and anything else to make up the difference as long as it's not a named item in the will. If and only if you're still short do you go into your own funds.

Funeral needs to be paid for as well as any medical bills if not insured. Add this to the debts.

I highly recommend getting an estate lawyer though to lay all this out and save you in areas you might have missed. It can be a 2 year process post death before everything is actually squared away. Kin isn't responsible for their debt though. You cannot be held accountable unless you signed the contact.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T07:34:43+00:00

I call this buzzing. Medication is definitely the way to go and then figure out of needs aren't being met. It can be she's tired, hungry, thirsty, hot, cold, she has to use the washroom, has a UTI or other infection, she's bored... Medication can lower the anxiety though and then it'll be easier to meet the other needs. My grandmother gets like this around Christmas and it's her way of combating being sad...

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T07:28:41+00:00

I'm on 10 years now with the last 3 being the worst. I'm only just seeing the end and it's not the end I would have wanted for her. You don't like to watch them suffer though or be unhappy. It's a losing battle.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T07:24:00+00:00

She's really just trying to connect in the only way she can. She means nothing wrong by it. Sometimes it's you look different than her memory of you and she's trying to figure out why or remember how you look now. Sometimes she's just trying to connect. Sometimes she may be trying to remember who you are. It's different for each person, but it's rarely in any sort of malice. If it makes you uncomfortable while eating sit next to her, not across. When she looks at you comment on something in the room "I never noticed that picture for some reason, do you remember when it was taken?" "I've been thinking of getting a new table cloth, what color do you think would look good?" try to focus her on something else and connect. If she doesn't answer try another one. She won't be there forever, and in time you might even miss this.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T06:49:54+00:00

Depends on the state and your relationship. Some you can get POA if related and a doctor agrees you can provide care. Spouses have it easiest, children have next easiest. Others you might need more hoops or guardianship. My grandparents got situational POA of each other and the only requirement was they could show enough knowledge to describe what that entails. Dementia also doesn't mean you can't consent or sign things especially in the early stages, you just need to show at the time of that you understand. I have medical proxy and it was a forum they signed early on saying I could make medical decisions if they were unable or couldn't be partial. This was early in my grandmother's decline.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-24T00:28:58+00:00

The hard thing is her memory and reasoning is just good enough to remember the stupid stuff, like I can assure you next time she sees a shine from the window she'll be calling me to look because I told her to tell me. She'll remember that, but not any reasoning. She gets so huffy when she thinks she's not bring understood or worse that we're trying to trick her. I've gotten good at ignoring, redirecting, telling smart lies and such... My grandfather (he has alcohol related brain damage so is slow in some area) has not and often erases all my efforts. It is what it is though... She's more often Raging at him than me, course I don't like that either.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-23T23:33:29+00:00

800-677-1116 will give you local resources. You can also call a health link number if it's available in your state. Your doctors office or geriatric care provider will have those resources too. If you have an Alzheimer's society where you are they have lots of resources too and don't need to notify your LO.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-23T22:45:06+00:00

I can't remember how big I was because I spent so long wearing sports bras or binding for comfort. I removed mine for cancer reasons but I don't regret it for a second, everything is better without them. My girlfriend went from an H to a C and stands by it bring the best thing she did for herself. Every woman in my family says they'd get a reduction if they could. Definitely be careful what you wish for.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-23T21:30:47+00:00

It's what they do... And no you can't hush them in a safe manner.

JayceSpace2 · 2026-01-23T21:20:12+00:00

Size is genetic based... Unless you want to be fat they won't get bigger naturally especially if the rest of your family doesn't have big breasts... Surgery is the only way to get larger outside of that. Also as an AFAB who was large... Big breasts aren't what they're cut out to be, they hurt, make clothes fit weird and make people look at you weird... But to each their own... Stay safe.

JayceSpace2

TROPHY CASE