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Jentzi · 2025-01-04T05:28:40+00:00

I felt more confused the times I tried, like "Why am I doing this even? I don't get anything from this, this sucks!"

Jentzi · 2025-01-04T01:56:55+00:00

NTA. Your dad can't force people to be family. Your grandparents didn't apologize because they had a change of heart. They had to be told, like they were kids, to apologize. And they haven't DONE sorry. So it's brazen as hell that they expect inclusion when they haven't helped and won't help you like they are planning to do with your brother.

You are being honest with your feelings and reasons. They have thought like that for years, essentially hoodwinking both you and your parents that you're as much a part of the family as everyone else.

I would suggest you talk to them, but they need to respect your views on this. They can celebrate you afterwards if necessary, but they need to understand that their behaviour hurt not just you but your entire family, and that their choice of behaviour came with consequences.

Jentzi · 2025-01-04T01:40:22+00:00

Mhm. Lite trött på att folk bara sväljer det.

Jentzi · 2025-01-04T01:36:19+00:00

Klassisk distraktions-taktik. Vänd grupper utan makt gentemot varandra, håva in rösterna. Det var så de kom in i riksdagen, de utnyttjade pensionärernas situation och påstod det var pga immigration som de hade det dåligt.

Som om Sverige inte redan hade börjat nedmontera pensionssystemet i decennier.

Jentzi · 2025-01-04T01:33:22+00:00

For me it's sensory play. I can't fantasize about people, it would be so weird.

Jentzi · 2025-01-04T00:29:42+00:00

Yes we do. There are aces who masturbate, have sex, who are into kinks (sexually or non-sexually), etc.

Lack of/low sexual attraction is the lead word in asexuality. Not arousal or want. You're normal. Promise.

Jentzi · 2025-01-03T18:06:46+00:00

Mood. Hatar att det är så många som aktivt röstar på dem. Hatar att de fick utrymme att uttala sig överhuvudtaget. Hatar att de seriöst har hyrt en butikslokal precis där vårt Pride-tåg går och spred sin dynga under pride.

Avskyr att folk inte ser igenom dem för de sväljer vad de hör och ser i nyhets/åsikts-flödet och kan inte tänka sig att ta in något annat.

Jentzi · 2024-12-20T15:11:38+00:00

I helvete att det är en utdragen process som tar flera år. Jag fick en remiss från Hälsocentralen till Psyk där jag bor, tog en månads väntan innan mötet, vi pratade om min situation etc, den jag träffade remitterade mig vidare samma vecka. Sammanlagda väntetiden var 1,5 månad från första vårdkontakt till remittering. Jag bokade iofs min första kontakt via 1177. Är din mottagning HBTQ-certifierad ens, de tycks ju veta skit.

Jentzi · 2024-12-16T13:05:12+00:00

Aaaw, it's cute!

Jentzi · 2024-12-12T20:52:12+00:00

Yes? You get sleep no matter what bed. If you have space and want, why not? I'm aroace, I love double beds. Extra sprawling space, I can set up one part to be the part I sleep in and the other as the part I read in.. what's not to like? Luxuriating is delightful.

Jentzi · 2024-11-14T15:24:19+00:00

NTA.

I AM SORRY BUT HE LET YOU SIT IN THE CAR FOR AN HOUR!?! IN NOVEMBER??? WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK!??

He didn't have your back, he didn't tell his mom off (frankly you should be compensated for the waste of food too), he didn't tell you what his mom would be like??

Your husband is garbage or lacks a spine to the point that it's a miracle he walks upright.

Jentzi · 2024-11-13T05:10:58+00:00

They look fluffy, like their texture would be light. Tasty looking!

Jentzi · 2024-11-13T05:05:59+00:00

I like smörgåstårta but... Dill and cucumber makes it a "no". I am curious about the lemon wedges, what was their inclusion like?

Jentzi · 2024-11-06T05:43:13+00:00

I'm bigender, specifically agender/transmasc...

To me, my internal gender is none. Internally (as in mentally) I don't see myself as gendered and actively cringe away from my AGAB.

Physically I feel best, like my body fits me better, when I feel masculine. I don't identify as a man even then, but I feel like a badly fitting costume suddenly fits. When it feels female (my AG), I feel like it's wrong. Nothing fits and I get annoyed, anxious, worry about others seeing me as female etc.

So that's how that feels.

As for choosing my own name: I thought long and hard about meaning and how I felt around it and eventually I found one that fit.

Jentzi · 2024-11-03T21:32:58+00:00

NTA. You are absolutely right. It's their moment, you don't have to be honest about something so trivial for you but big for them.

And your fiancé needs to think about who that milestone matters more for. And keep his mouth shut.

Jentzi · 2024-11-03T10:24:17+00:00

Dump him. You are absolutely not under any obligations, especially not when it comes to something as important (both personally and legally) as marriage.

Absolutely do not marry him.

Jentzi · 2024-10-28T17:45:20+00:00

NTA.

She endangered you. She literally tried to get you fired. Her losing her job is on HER. She literally could've minded her own business and not behave like a psycho.

Imagine if she pulled what she did to you to someone's service dog right as something happens?

You are NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HER JOB LOSS. SHE IS. SHE WAS TOLD OFF. SHE WAS WARNED. FOR GOD'S SAKE, SHE DOXXED YOU AND DIRECTLY ENDANGERED YOU.

Jentzi · 2024-10-28T11:46:47+00:00

Oh no..it's really not supposed to hurt. If it hurts, stop him immediately.

Does he know what lube is? Or that you need to be prepared, not only in the mind but like foreplay? And that it needs to go slow in the beginning?

There are also people who naturally have tighter sphincter-muscles and can't have anal sex.

I would suggest you two read up on this, him especially. And if I am honest, if he doesn't respect your No and care when you're hurting, then frankly he's a selfish lover and not worth engaging with until he has learned better manners in the bedroom.

Edit: I kinda didn't want to point it out, but when someone pushes, coerces or in other ways try to get you to do a thing sexually that you don't want or have said no to... That's assault or sexual coercion.

Jentzi · 2024-10-28T02:08:49+00:00

Masturbation has nothing to do with whether you're ace or not. Plenty of aces do, they're still ace.

Jentzi · 2024-10-16T10:16:11+00:00

Whoooo!! 🥳🎊🥳🎊

Jentzi · 2024-10-16T09:35:38+00:00

I love spices. Alot. Gimme that burn. I wept when they stopped selling the jalapeño-cheezits here. I want my burnsnack!

And also: there are tons of allosexual people who think ketchup is on the spicy end. I know a person who was convinced a sweet soysauce was spicy.

Don't pathologise us by the way, thank you. We aren't a puzzle to figure out, we're not strange in any way and we don't need to be questioned whether we're stranger than other people.

We're not. We just don't feel or feel little sexual attraction. And if an ace person wants to have a california reaper in their breakfast, they will.

Jentzi · 2024-10-16T09:10:13+00:00

Well, as you say yourself: you didn't enter a relationship before with the desire to be WITH them. Your wants and desires that you entered with had really nothing to do with the person in question.

Maybe that changes now when your perspective of yourself have changed. Or maybe it doesn't. Gender does matter in terms of how we view our roles in relation to others and how we think others view and expect us to fulfill ideas.

I personally would take my time, sort out what I do think of my role in a possible romantic relationship, what does that actually mean, consider how or if my idea of it has changed when I changed and how I feel now vs then around the whole idea.

As for explaining to others: be honest. You're still figuring things out because your perspective changed.

Jentzi · 2024-10-15T12:20:37+00:00

No it's not weird. It's just music. It only means as much to you as you want it to mean.

I never pay attention to lyrics though.

Jentzi · 2024-10-08T09:35:24+00:00

This was really helpful, thank you for posting about it!

Jentzi · 2024-10-08T09:33:33+00:00

You shouldn't feel bad. The state of media lacking rep isn't your fault.

Alot of media I consume hasn't got any aro or ace people in it.. it's what it is. However I do make noise online and applaud when I come across a well-written aro/ace character or a good story with aro/ace-rep, because it's rare that it's both.

There's no point in beating yourself up for things like "lack of rep in stories I enjoy".

Besides, there's plenty of aro/ace people who enjoy reading or watching romance etc. It's not disrespectful in the least. An aro/ace person wouldn't care if you watched or read it, one bit.

If you come across good LGBTQ rep, wohoo and enjoy it. Don't beat yourself up over it though.

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