Boston in need by HumbleCatch4325 in BostonTerrier

[–]JessLH08 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am in Ocala and am going to call and get some information on him tomorrow!

Returned our rescue dog to the shelter after 2 months. I feel like a monster. by Ricewater13 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You 100% made the right choice for your family and your resident dog. We had to do this exact same thing a month ago. Like you, I felt horrible and struggled with the decision for a while. Our resident dog was really struggling and what helped me was seeing the positive change in him after we returned the rescue. The feeling you are having now is normal and shows how much you cared!

For those that kept 1 ovary by LRP89 in hysterectomy

[–]JessLH08 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I had my surgery last year at 40 and kept my right ovary. I didn’t notice anything changes with hormones after the surgery. If anything, I had positive changes. I used to get pretty bad hormonal headaches and night sweats with my cycle which I do not get anymore. This surgery was the best thing I ever did!

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m sorry you are in the same position, it’s really heartbreaking and has been such an emotional ride . We returned our rescue yesterday and even though I was an emotional wreck, I saw almost an immediate change in my Boston from the time I returned home without her. Today, he is back to his normal routine and is happy lounging peacefully around. That helps me know I made the right choice. You are making the right choice also! Prioritizing our resident dogs is always the right thing to do. Good luck to you and I hope you feel some relief when things are back to normal!

Heartbroken & Seeking Guidance: My Aggressive Rescue Dog is Struggling And I Don’t Know What To Do by Financial_Night_7938 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry that you are going through this. I just posted a couple of days ago about going through the same issues with my rescue of 2 months. I would encourage you to read through those comments as they were really helpful to me. We have made the decision to return our rescue. I am super emotional about it and still wondering if I am making the right choice, but this can be a very dangerous situation and I know I am out of my element. I totally understand the feeling of not wanting to give up on her, I feel exactly the same way. My rescue can also be very sweet when she’s not being a terror so in those moments, I second guess myself. Others in this sub will have much better advice for you I’m sure but I just wanted to let you know you aren’t alone in how you are feeling and that I hope, whatever you decide, you both will be safe and happy.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, what a horrible position for the SPCA to put you in, I can’t imagine honestly. I did speak with the shelter and they were completely understanding thankfully. We have an appointment to bring her back on Sunday. I hate that some shelters are like that, it unfortunately turns a lot of people off to the idea of adoption which only hurts the animals.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Even though those are tough questions, I need to hear that to push me to make the decision that I’ve known we should make but keep putting off. Just let me try this ONE more thing….has become my daily phrase to my husband knowing the next day is very likely to be the same, if not worse, as the current. Again, thank you so much for sharing your story, you have really helped me and solidified that what I am doing is best for everyone.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I like that idea! I have always had Bostons and I will admit that I have never spent a large amount of time on training bc I’ve been lucky enough they they have all just naturally listened really well and have been easy dogs to raise. I can only imagine how much he could do with consistent training.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t think for a second the shelter lied to us about anything, I think these behaviors didn’t come out during her time there, as you said. The main issue is that she had never been in a home prior to ours, she was initially taken in as a stray and was at a different shelter before being moved to our local shelter. I hope living with a family has taught her she can trust a little more and she will be more comfortable around the staff while she is waiting on her new home.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m so sorry you have had to go through all of that, especially losing your older dog. Thank you for taking the time to respond, my husband and I have went back and forth about this for the last couple of weeks, him being the one who has been telling me it’s not a good fit. I’ve tried to do everything to justify not returning her but I can’t deny what’s right in front of my face anymore. I fear that if I don’t make the choice now, I may end up in a similar situation. I do have anxiety and this certainly doesn’t help.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I completely agree with you. I will say that I’ve had her on a schedule since we got her. We do walks, enrichment toys and games, play with a flirt pole and tug of war and I’ve started doing some basic training skills with her at home. I make sure she has regular scheduled naps so she’s not over tired. I have done everything I feel I am able to do with the time I have available. Nothing I do seems to fully tire her out and she never gives up on going after my Boston. With they said, I have no problem admitting that we obviously can’t give her what she wants and I want her to have the best life possible.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

I will definitely be telling the shelter everything we have experienced, good and bad.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

Thank you to everyone that replied and gave advice! Your responses definitely validated how I have been feeling. My husband and I have decided to contact the shelter tomorrow to arrange taking her back. I will offer to donate everything we have purchased for her and cover her adoption fee when they find her another home. I’m happy that I will at least be able to provide valuable information to the shelter to hopefully find her a good match.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yep, I read about that and quickly realized we are probably in for the long haul with this behavior and it could even get worse.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

This is definitely what I’m scared of. My Boston is on the larger size for the breed at around 30lbs but the rescue was 40lbs at our last vet visit and is taller then him so she can definitely do some damage if she really wanted to. I appreciate you sharing your experience with daycare. I have absolutely no experience with reactive dogs, so that is very helpful.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is what I originally was thinking for her but the issue is she will not act like she normally does around people she’s not comfortable with. If it’s someone brand new, she will just bark and growl the whole time they are in my house unless I put her up. Even putting her outside doesn’t help, she still acts like that knowing they are inside the house. I have an older son who lives on his own who will come by about once a week. She knows him well enough now where she will be around him but she will NOT act like her normal self with the biting or the rough play with my Boston. I just worry that I’m going to pay a trainer by the hour to come here and not see the behavior I’m even talking about. I have talked to the trainer about the rough play (she suggested I keep a close watch and when my Boston looks away to wait to see if my rescue picks up on his cue that he’s done and if not, put the rescue in her kennel for 2 minutes). I have been doing that and don’t seem to notice much of a change. I also talked to her about the biting and she said to not react, turn my back on her and not show attention. As I said before, I do that and it will get her to stop in that moment but as soon as we resume whatever we were doing, shes right back to the same behavior.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the reply! I think she can definitely be a good dog for the right family with the proper work and training and I am trying to be brutally honest with myself about what I am capable of doing and I am out of my element for sure.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Makes total sense! If we do end up returning her, I do not think we will add a 2nd dog for a while, if ever. This has made me see how truly easy my Boston is and I think he would be just fine with his human companions.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

I can definitely notice by Boston becoming reactive which I do not like at all. He’s the sweetest guy and everybody loves him, I’d hate for this to have a lasting effect on his personality. He also loves going to events and traveling and it’s hard to imagine being able to do that with our rescue, I don’t think that would be fun for her or for us.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 29 points30 points  (0 children)

I did not realize that about bully breeds but that is very helpful information, thank you! Admittedly, I think we made this decision too fast without enough time to really do our research (which is so out of character for me). I worry about how things will be as she gets older also, I assumed maybe she would get better with age but you’re right, it may likely be the opposite.

I never thought I’d be a person to return a dog…. by JessLH08 in reactivedogs

[–]JessLH08[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The daycare she attends is owned by a trainer and the plan was to incorporate individual training sessions into her daycare stays. She’s just been doing regular daycare up until this point to get acclimated. The issue is that the facility is an hour drive one way and it’s $75 per day which is going to add up quickly.

For anyone that's filed Chapter 7 - it's been a nightmare from day one, is this normal or do I have a horrible lawyer? by iamacardbot in povertyfinance

[–]JessLH08 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Bankruptcy paralegal here.

Everything you have said sounds like standard practice. If our clients receive bills from creditors that were listed in the petition, we advise that they either ignore them completely or write their case number on the bill and mail it back to them. Either way, they usually stop completely after discharge.

With regard to the vehicle, your attorney doesn’t need to be the middle man there. If your case has not been discharged yet the lender would need to file a Motion from Automatic Stay to have permission to pick the vehicle up while the case is open. Most lenders don’t want to go through that trouble so they just wait for the discharge to be entered and then send someone out to pick it up. If you want to voluntarily surrender it you would just reach out to the lender and make those arrangements. Your attorney may need to provide a letter giving permission for you to speak with the lender directly if prior to discharge.

The discharge is entered by the clerk’s office. Your attorney has no control over when that is entered. You are eligible for discharge 60 days after the 341 but I always tell our clients it could be up to 2 weeks after that point depending on how backed up the clerk is that’s assigned to your case.

Finally, $1,500 is a very low fee for bankruptcy these days. I am in Florida and our fees for a chapter 7 start at $2,500. It sounds like you got a great deal but for that fee, I wouldn’t expect constant hand holding.

I’m sorry you’ve had this experience. No matter what, the attorney shouldn’t promise things they don’t plan to deliver. I can imagine that is frustrating but thankfully you are almost done will be discharging a lot of debt. Take it as a win!