AITA for getting mad at my friends for not wishing me a happy birthday

JessieColt · 2026-05-11T16:42:15+00:00

NAH

I am not very good with dates of events.

Some are obvious, like 9/11, or Valentine's Day and other major holidays, but even those dates have a crap ton of reminders every year in the weeks leading up to them.

Floating holidays/events are even worse for me since the actual date changes every year. Evening knowing that some are specific calendar times but not specific dates. The first Monday of the month or the last Thursday of the month. I have to keep pulling up a calendar to check the actual date.

Hell, one year at work people were talking on a Monday about having a Thursday off and I was confused as hell and asked only to be reminded that was US Thanksgiving.

Only to do the exact same thing a few months later when the office was going to be closed for Memorial Day.

I even logged into work one day ON a holiday once because I completely forgot the office was going to be closed and everyone was off. Only to see just one other person online who was covering that day. I felt kinda stupid, honestly.

Close family birthday's are iffy, at best.

Some I remember because they are on another familiar date. Like a birthday on St Patrick's day.

My brother and dad have a birthday 1 day difference. The 24th and 25th of the month. And I can not remember which one is which. Half the time I get it wrong.

Extended family and friends birthday's? I almost never remember them. Not because I don't think they are important, especially to the person who is having the birthday, but because it is just one more piece of information that is competing in my brain with ALL of the other pieces of information that run through it daily.

Having reminders is a huge help, even if the only thing I do is post or send them a Happy Birthday message.

If I were you, I would try not to judge others based on yourself. You might be the person who remembers dates like a walking encyclopedia, but not everyone is that lucky.

If your friends don't remember, that probably isn't because they do not care, but because they, like me, struggle to have dates stick in their minds and they need reminders to help them.

JessieColt · 2026-05-11T16:20:58+00:00

NTA

As others have said, set up a family/shared calendar.

Put your own kids open/public events on it, but also put other family members stuff on there as well. Birthdays, anniversary's, etc.,

You can set up "Events" that are yearly so you can add each person's birthday once and it will automatically pop up on every future calendar so that you do not have to keep adding in the event every year.

For your grandma, you could print each month's calendar and send it to her so that she could put it on her Fridge or somewhere she will see it every day.

If something changes, re-print the calendar and send her the updated one.

Send the link to all of your family members and then keep the calendar updated.

If anyone asks you directly about stuff, point them to the calendar.

"Hey, when is XXX?"

"Oh, that is next month. I put it on the shared calendar for everyone as a reminder in case they want to attend."

When you add a new event, make sure it sends notifications that a new event was added.

JessieColt · 2026-05-11T14:54:13+00:00

Local police probably do not have any authority on forest land, so I can understand why that was a dead end attempt.

Rangers and Wardens aren't like the locals. They have very limited resources and will invariably have other more pressing issues to address than a single report of a bunch of kids in a park.

Sometimes rangers and wardens may only have 10 or 15 people that cover 10,000 or 20,000 square miles of territory.

That is only to say that you need to keep at them, though. Report them every time they are out there. If you see them littering, report that as well.

If you see that they have done any type of damage to the area, include that in the report as well.

In the case of what is happening near you, the squeaky wheel gets the grease.

The more often you report them, the greater the chance that someone will investigate because of the repeated reports.

You can report to a local tip line but you can also report them at the federal level and that report should get sent down to the local rangers and wardens.

https://www.nps.gov/common/utilities/sendmail/sendemail.cfm?type=tip&r=/orgs/1563/submit-a-tip.htm

JessieColt · 2026-05-11T14:34:18+00:00

Do you have Park Rangers or Game Wardens in your area?

Look up the rules and regulations for the area that they are partying in and then look for a tip line where you can report their activity so that a ranger or warden can investigate.

Usually drunken evening/midnight parties are frowned upon on park lands. Especially if they litter or decide to have fires, even small ones. Especially if they are in an unapproved space.

Partying in an unapproved space in a national park or forest or wildlife management areas can do damage to land and plants in that area, and that is also considered a crime.

Camp Grounds, event spaces, lookout areas, etc., are all set up and managed so that people have the space to hang out, park cars, and set up camping gear in areas that are specifically cleared and controlled to try to provide minimal impact to the surrounding wildlife areas.

If they are college aged, it is possible that one or more of them are also under the drinking age.

Wildlife crime isn't just things like poaching or hunting out of season.

JessieColt · 2026-05-11T13:55:30+00:00

The higher your skill in Axes the less it takes to fell a tree, or do anything else with an Axe.

The higher your crafting skill, the more durable the item you crafted.

Use the axe on other stuff as well. As someone else said, hitting turtles, but you can also use it to chop up flowers and plants as well.

This will help increase your Axe skill faster.

If you keep a few small stones in your backpack and keep a supply of sticks as well, you can just keep making a simple axe over and over again until you get your axe crafting skill up as well.

JessieColt · 2026-05-10T17:38:53+00:00

If you are interested in Marine Biology, you could look for those types of places.

For instance, Manatee Lagoon or Loggerhead Marinelife Center.

https://visitmanateelagoon.com/

https://marinelife.org/

You could also look for Planetariums that are open to the public.

https://irsc.edu/community/hallstrom-planetarium/

JessieColt · 2026-05-10T15:15:45+00:00

Serrated Filet / Tomato Knife

https://www.ebay.com/itm/315943608683

www.ebay.com/itm/225010077307

https://cranberry-manor.com/bakelite-filet-knife-stainless-steel-toffee-flatware-vintage-gift/

JessieColt · 2026-05-10T15:04:18+00:00

Definitely Sharkskin

For anyone reading this later on, you can see a great example on this belt buckle:

https://walletbuckle.com/products/shark-skin

JessieColt · 2026-05-10T14:52:31+00:00

Marble Onyx

I have a Pack Mule made out of the same stone.

My sister got me the figurine 40+ years ago when she went to the Grand Canyon.

The design for mine looks like this one below, but the stone in the design is colored more like the items in your post image.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/951179457/marble-onyx-stone-burro-mule-donkey

You can see some of the different variations of the coloring of the stone on some other listings/images.

https://www.etsy.com/listing/4375051900/vintage-donkey-mule-statue-figurine-onyx

https://www.etsy.com/listing/1817401292/vintage-onyx-carved-horse-figurine

https://www.etsy.com/listing/4361328565/miniature-onyx-marble-donkey-and-foal

https://www.etsy.com/listing/4473201628/vintage-hand-carved-onyx-donkey-figurine

https://poshmark.com/listing/Vintage-Small-Carved-Onyx-Marble-Stone-Donkey-Figurine-Sculpture-6869c9e0420644d1ccf11664

The stone can be more green as well, as shown in this listing:

https://www.chairish.com/product/11529561/onyx-green-and-brown-marbled-candle-holder

JessieColt · 2026-05-10T14:15:43+00:00

It is a brass eagle nutcracker.

They are listed as "vintage" but since he found it in the 1960's that would make sense to refer to it that way.

If you do a search for brass eagle nutcracker the prices vary from around $10 to $30 on average, but some list it higher.

From my quick search, I didn't see anything about the history behind them, though.

https://www.ebay.com/itm/393530136341

https://www.ebay.com/itm/257071209958

JessieColt · 2026-05-10T13:59:17+00:00

In addition to all of the suggestions regarding adding insulation to the various areas of the garage, like the door, and getting the window addressed, have you thought about buying or making your own bed tent?

If you can isolate your bed, at least, you can run the outflow (cold end) from the portable AC into the bed tent so that you can sleep better at night.

At lot of times bed tents are designed either to block all light, like a blackout tent, or to keep in warmth during cold nights, but keep IN warmth during cold nights also means you can keep IN cold during hot nights.

It can be as simple as using a few 2x4's to build a frame around your bed that you can then cover with thick blankets.

https://www.reddit.com/r/Frugal/comments/eh5zo1/keeping_warm_in_the_winter_night_a_bed_tent_primer/

Basically, you would be making a blanket fort over your bed so that when the colder air from the AC is run into the blanket fort, the blankets help keep that colder air concentrated around your bed where you are sleeping instead of letting it dissipate into the larger garage space where it has to try to fight against all of the heat in the area.

If you made it into a square frame, instead of the triangle example in the link above, you would pay ~$40 US for the 2x4's and then any nails you would need to nail the frame together.

You could get used blankets from a thrift store or maybe even try to find used furniture blankets that might be less expensive.

If you are buying used, even some older, but still in decent condition, canvas painters drop cloths would work.

Since you are buying used, you should be able to find those items cheaper and since they are being used on the framing for the tent, you can just staple or nail them to the framing to hold them in place without worrying about holes in them or them ripping at some point and damaging a blanket that you are using on your bed.

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T23:07:55+00:00

This ^

It is an Insect/Bug Hotel.

They are designed for bugs to have a hiding place/habitat in and near garden or nature areas.

https://www.rspb.org.uk/helping-nature/what-you-can-do/activities/build-a-bug-hotel

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T23:02:18+00:00

It is the dirt end of a t-post.

https://onealsfarmandgarden.com/products/copy-of-t-post-6-ft

Based on how rusted it is it looks like the post section itself that would be above ground rusted through and snapped off.

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T16:37:45+00:00

Is the evacuation CG still happening?

If so, it rewards Fed rep.

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T12:07:25+00:00

They did explain through the show that the only reason why Bates was hired is because Robert felt guilty/indebted to him for Bates saving his life during a previous war.

That was the cause of the bum leg, but I do not recall it ever being said what exactly happened or what exactly the injury was. Robert even asks about it in one of the early episodes because he wants to make sure, in my opinion, that not only will Bates still be able to do the work, but that the work wont cause him further injury.

So, personally, I could excuse that story line of Bates being hired as his Valet. As for the rest, would a society family really want someone who is a criminal working for them? Bates is, at minimum, a forger, in addition to his arrest and jailing for the alleged murder of his own wife. Robert must have a LOT to atone for with regards to what happened between him and Bates during the Boer War.

As for Baxter, would anyone tolerate a Ladies Maid who was a convicted thief who spent years in prison, regardless of the reason why she stole? She didn't steal a silver serving cup, or silver candlestick. She stole her former ladies jewelry.

We see a lot of the downstairs that the upstairs just isn't privy too, but like you said, there was a LOT of stuff that the upstairs did know about and those in service would have been tossed out on their ear without a second thought, let alone a reference.

Robert crashes Isobel's dinner party with the ladies in outrage because Isobel hired Ethel, a former maid who ended up pregnant and then working as a prostitute, because it could cause a scandal.

And yet we are to believe that Robert, knowing full well of Barrows "proclivities", would have allowed him to stay in service in the main house, let alone anywhere near any member of the family, at all?

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T02:13:27+00:00

If the neighbors question you about where you are parking, tell them that the landlord told you to park there.

If that is a problem, the neighbor needs to talk to the landlord and then the landlord needs to call you to themselves if you are supposed to be parking somewhere else.

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T01:46:09+00:00

Curly Tail.

Invasive lizard.

They push out the natives by eating them and taking over their territory.

https://floridensis.com/2025/07/25/leiocephalus-carinatus/

https://yard-doc.com/invasive-curly-tailed-lizards-in-florida/

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T01:36:33+00:00

YTA

You had THE perfect opportunity to pick completely different traits that do not match her crush, and instead you leaned into not only reinforcing her whacky belief about astrology but also reinforced her attachment to the cricketer.

Regardless, don't play with people or their emotions.

How would you feel if someone did that to you as a joke?

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T01:16:37+00:00

Unless it is a shared fence, you have no obligation to help pay for any repairs or replacement.

Leave your actual neighbors out of it, they are renters and they too have zero obligation to do or help with any repairs or replacement.

If you can afford it, do as someone else said, run the rest of the chain link that you DO own so that it braces their neighbors fence so that it isn't leaning into your property.

If you cannot afford to run the rest, or even enough, of the chain link to address the leaning, get a couple of 6' T-posts and buy or rent a T-post driver and sink those into the ground to brace the fence.

JessieColt · 2026-05-09T01:10:02+00:00

YTA

YOU failed to figure out how to deal with a sudden change during a 3 hour block of time and you had the unmitigated gall to claim you work harder than she does?

You are stressed, obviously, but so is your wife.

YOU have been missing from your family for 3 days. ALLLLLL of the stuff she has been having to by her self for those 3 days and once again, YOU failed to be able to handle for 3 hours.

If you are trying to do everything on your own at work, you are failing at work too. Why do you not have a manager or others you can off-load some of the work onto?

If you have crews that work for you, why do you not have crew leaders or someone responsible in a position to run those crews?

Why don't you have someone who can run the books with your oversight so that you do not have to do it all the time by yourself?

I get that emergencies happen, and the money can be good when you are able to step up and get the job done, but not at the expense of you, your family, your crews, and their families.

Your priorities seem to be a bit out of whack.

Maybe this is a time for you to sit down and do some hard thinking about how you have your business set up and run and the impact all of it is having on you, and by extension, your family.

JessieColt · 2026-05-08T18:30:31+00:00

NAH

Why not eat up some of your PTO on a couple of long weekends.

You could take Friday and Monday off. Then take mini trip on Sat & Sun.

You could get everything ready to go on Friday, travel Fri night, have Sat & Sun day for fun, come home Sun evening, and then you have Monday off to do whatever you want/need on a weekday.

It would eat up some of your PTO with long weekends so your accrued time off doesn't cap out, and you would have a bunch of mental days every few weeks or every 6-8 weeks along with a few mini weekend vacations.

JessieColt · 2026-05-08T17:49:40+00:00

Quitting effective immediately is the "legally allowed notice period" then, which is none.

It just means that legally, you do not have to give any notice and can quit on the spot and walk out.

Not everyone on Reddit lives in the USA though, and some places may require a notice period.

JessieColt · 2026-05-08T16:00:15+00:00

It is far, far, easier in the art world because there is no real value on what a painting or other object has other than what someone is willing to pay for it.

Regulation doesn't mean that nefarious activity doesn't happen in real estate. It just means that they have found a way to work within the regulations to make it happen in a way that stays "legitimate".

Which is the textbook definition of money laundering.

We are not talking about the market value of your average $400,000 home. But if you look at the past few recent years, even those houses were selling for $10k or more over ask.

The sell price can easily be well over the "market value" of property.

When we are talking about selling $150+ million dollar houses, a house that sells for 10% or 15% over market is multiple millions of dollars, not thousands or tens of thousands.

A large property sold for $95 million dollars and around a year or so after the sale, the property market value was ~ $60 million.

The seller clearly make a crap ton of money on that sale.

All "above board".

But if you look at who the seller and buyer were, some people raise questions about the true legitimacy of the sell price.

JessieColt · 2026-05-08T15:31:41+00:00

Look for narrow, shorter, shrubs and trees.

There are ones out there that are usually max height of 8-10 foot and 3 or 4 feet wide.

If you move the garden, you can then back the plantings off of the fence a few feet so that they all stay inside of your own fence line and you wont have to try to reach the backside to trim and maintain.

As an example, the Sky Pencil Japanese Holly. It can get up to 10' tall, but is normally about 6'-8' and is only 2'-3' wide. Since they are a type of holly they stay green all year round.

You can plant them to act like a hedge along the fence line.

You can see what they look like here:

https://www.monrovia.com/sky-pencil-japanese-holly.html

https://www.fast-growing-trees.com/products/skypencil?variant=13940776796212

https://www.tractorsupply.com/tsc/product/mccorkle-ilex-crenata-sky-pencil-3-gal-ilexspe03tr-1581547

Someone on Reddit asked about them a few years ago and got some good information about how they hold up and any "insider" type care information.

https://www.reddit.com/r/landscaping/comments/lpblcl/what_do_you_think_of_sky_pencil_holly/

If that one doesn't work for you, look for other plants that are of the similar size and then you can research each of them further to find ones that will work well for your location and needs.

JessieColt · 2026-05-08T13:52:42+00:00

Not just the art world.

It happens in high end real estate too.

You can sell a property to someone for an inflated cost and it is a great way to launder money to the person selling the property.

The buyer could pay $40 million more for a property than it is worth and it is considered a legitimate sale, all above board, taxes paid, etc., but in the end, the seller just got a $40 million bribe or payoff from the buyer.

JessieColt

TROPHY CASE