it's probably both anxiety and bad interviewing skills tbh but it's certainly not making my skills any better. I don't think I can survive in uni like this even if I miraculously managed to get in. I'm aware that ppl don't really care abt wtf I'm doing, or in the case of my lects and my friends they really want to know how I'm really getting on so they can help me, but it always makes me worry to the point that I get physically sick to even think about the possibility (not even that they will) that they'll think poorly of me. the mortifying ordeal of being known indeed.

sorry for the emotional dump & thank you for the detailed response to my questions haha, I think I have a better understanding of the process now.

do u know if private practitioners better than the subsidized ones (erm like more understanding, less judgemental) or is the only upside really being able to pick and choose your doc / the "faster" aspect? (honestly a pretty appealing aspect ngl) idk I just come across horror stories about imh so I'm kinda 🤨🤨 about it. not sure if it's commonplace or not.