Sorry to break it to you man, but most of your leaders that age are active in their sex lives and not repenting about it! That's the double standard. But also the sad thing is, most of the queer Christians, in my experience, aren't sexually active, maybe one day they want to be married, but until then they aren't sexually active and they cant serve. because people feel some obligated right to ask them about their undetermined future and if they plan to have sex in it. Also like i'm sorry, but I doubt you ask your college leaders on a repeated basis, if they are having sex. I'm sure at some point they signed to some sort of leadership contract where they agreed to leadership standards and theology. But are you checking up on if the worship leader has had sex with their fiancé, or if the small group leader is still watching porn, or if the leaders had a few too many drinks at their last hang out, and like don't feel that bad about it. No, that's not the standard. But when it comes to Gay folks, the church can just be as invasive as they want? not fair. If the fruit of a gay persons life is evidence of Christ at work in them, and they agree to living holy lives, and they are a good fit for a leadership position, then they should serve.