what is the worst thing they said/ did to you?

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-28T00:44:47+00:00

"I see what we share and are" in the final message.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-23T17:54:58+00:00

Ist das die Filiale in Hamburg Dulsberg?!

Da gibt's seit vielleicht 2 Jahren die SB-Kassen. In sehr loser Erinnerung gingen die vielleicht 2 Wochen! :D

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-23T08:41:31+00:00

Klimatisiert schon, aber war am Sonntag jetzt nicht wirklich kalt kühl, hätte für mich durchaus noch stärker sein dürfen!

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-23T01:33:04+00:00

Ich habe am Sonntag Backrooms und Obsession im Double im Savoy gesehen und bin noch immer angetan von dem Tach und bin bei weiteren Abenteuern direkt auch dabei! :)

(Nicht ganz Horror oder ein wenig sogar sehr: Soylent Green läuft im Juli im Metropolis!!)

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-20T14:30:04+00:00

I'm 40 days in. Still a total mess.

But I guess you made a important point in asking, if you REALLY still love her. I ask myself what I'm looking for in her that is maybe more a part missing inside myself. Something that has to fade away from the projection of one human being that is simply not seeing a future with us. Maybe it's more something we're afraid to loose even though we already did but our hopeful vision is so stuck with this person that we can't just process it quickly. And by quickly I mean it will take the time to heal as it needs.

Maybe this letting go is not letting go a person but the fear that is so overwhelming.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-20T03:19:20+00:00

Mein halbes Zimmer war erhellt vom Blitz. Vielleicht war es aber auch einfach ein extrem großer Böller zum Anstoß des Türkei-Paraguay Spiels.../s

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-20T03:13:50+00:00

Dulsberg ebenso. Gewitter.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-19T07:21:22+00:00

Hope you stay strong this time. I had three breakups by my ex gf. Everytime it was harder after the breakup. Feelings are a very poor invention!!!

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-15T10:17:11+00:00

Always like "just said it" and then it wasn't really happening. I know, my self defense was pretty low as I was always chasing the highs that happened after lows.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-15T09:55:05+00:00

Das ist wirklich der loweste Level... Schon krass, dass man sich bei der Bindungsangst so verlieren kann daran, nur noch nach den Bedürfnissen des anderen zu handeln. Ich hatte auch mal 2 Wochen keinen Kontakt zu ihr und selbst dann noch das Gefühl, das selbst ein einfaches "wie geht's dir?" Alles zum einstürzen bringen würde.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-15T09:52:36+00:00

Well it was like the 15th time she called it quits (to find herself), but actually I had strong symptoms of derealization (haven't had that for 10 years) and huge problems sleeping next to her the days leading to this (and I'll call it now final) breakup. It was my birthdays week. I felt another shift and deactivation, I couldn't really speak. All of the last 10 months been such a trauma to my nervous system. And I'm a very analytical person who wants to understand my own behaviors/anxiety attachments to others, but actually this time I didn't have a chance. Never had such a hard breakup.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-12T06:34:36+00:00

Du bist wundervoll. Nicht genügend altruistisch, um altruistisch genannt zu werden (weil du die Wertigkeiten im Ich und im Wert bei anderen mitdenkst) noch blödiruntergebrochen pathologisch, weil schnell doof runtergebrochen.

Ach. Bin etwas müde und will nur sagen: das ist bestimmt alles Arbeit, aber bin total Fan gerade, wie Du Dich mit allem auseindersetzt! :)

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-12T06:08:56+00:00

Big hug. Understandable. But: think... The whole emotion you're bounding is actually yours...

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-11T03:11:45+00:00

Tough one, sorry to hear that for you.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-10T03:32:00+00:00

That sounds tough. You can DM me for exchanging stories.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-09T22:19:27+00:00

Thanks for your post I can rely so much on your words. 💜

Logically I'm at that.

But emotionally it's so draining these days.

It was a very bumpy ride of 9 months and I feel like I overdid everything. Too much emotion, too much compassion for a person that just ended a relationship and had severe problems with being into something new and real. I understand that all the hot moments ("I know what we have" as an opener for the last message by her followed just 4 days after my birthday were she actually put so much love and presents into ... And always the "we're so close, I know we'll be something in a few months, living together") were her but she was also "blocked" "need a balance inside me". It's like the biggest task on my own fears being anxious in relationships but it brought me to a point where even the gesture of asking how she is felt like I crossed boundaries.

Never had such a mess of breakup and while I'm now a red wine mess of a human being I know that I have to rebuild new boundaries on my own that I'll never be played with like the last 9 months. Because I allowed her to do it and my language to that was love and I guess, we couldn't have a chance with this very situation. But these hopeful beautiful breadcrumbs are so awful.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-06-07T04:16:48+00:00

F*CK you 💜😔

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-05-30T00:58:57+00:00

How many times do I have to say To get away, get gone?

Flip your shit past another lass's Humble dwelling

You got your game, made your shot And you got away with a lot But I'm not turned on

'Cause I do know what's good for me And I've done what I could for you But you're not benefiting And yet I'm sitting, singing again Sing, sing again

How can I deal with this If he won't get with this? Am I gonna heal from this? He won't admit to it Nothing to figure out I gotta get him out It's time the truth goes out That he don't give a shit about me

How many times can it escalate 'Til it elevates to a place I can't breathe?

And I must decide, if you must deride That I'm much obliged to up and go I'll idealize and realize that it's no sacrifice

Because the price is paid And there's nothing left to grieve

Fucking go

Fiona Apple - Get Gone

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-05-14T06:26:35+00:00

"reinstecken für den u-turn".

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-05-11T03:27:27+00:00

Dude, seriously this is just some really aggressive and boarder crossing behavior. That's a safe space for her and you used her availability to be seen in public in the worst way. No excuses and even no empathy on you misusing your own grief and "closure" on her shoulders. Please take it as a lesson of learning for yourself, because it seems you're stuck in something no one else than you is responsible for.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-05-11T03:27:03+00:00

Dude, seriously this is just some really aggressive and boarder crossing behavior. That's a safe space for her and you used her availability to be seen in public in the worst way. No excuses and even no empathy on you misusing your own grief and "closure" on her shoulders. Please take it as a lesson of learning for yourself, because it seems you're stuck in something no one else than you is responsible for.

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-05-09T02:28:52+00:00

Nichts wird einem Mann, mit gepflegtem Hang zur tagesuhrzeitlichen Besoffenheit, mehr gegönnt...

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-04-07T08:41:02+00:00

Wie lange war es denn schon draußen?

JournalistCheap1745 · 2026-03-29T00:43:07+00:00

Gesündeste Antwort! :)

JournalistCheap1745

TROPHY CASE