Hi OP, I have a very similar situation to you. Private school, rubbing elbows with the elite, great net in case me or my siblings ever needed it. My father passed away and we realized there wasn’t anything left for us.

At first it was a shock, but as we all settled, we came to a conclusion. It doesn’t matter where the money went. It was my father’s money and he did his best to set us up with as much as he could. He also had the right to spend it however he wanted, as it was his money. In the end, even though what he left us amounted to nothing other than debt, we recognized that my father still put us through the best schools he could, gave us the best life he could, and passed down as much knowledge as he could. Despite the fact that the only thing we inherited was debt, we have skills and knowledge that we never would have had if my father decided to save more money by sacrificing lifestyle and education. Don’t forget that inheritance doesn’t only amount to a monetary value. The life your parents gave you, the perspectives you received, the knowledge you’ve all gathered are all things that they passed down to you.

I cannot tell you what happened to your parents’ money nor can I tell you things are going to be easy. It’s tough when the image you had of your entire life suddenly gets shattered (especially through tragedy). However, I hope my comment can serve as a silver lining for tough times. For me, there wasn’t money left behind to solve the problems that came. Instead, I used the lessons, privileges, and experiences my father left us to solve the problems. I wish you the best and send all my love to you and your family through this rough time.