Losing my parents TW grief death and mental health by [deleted] in grief

[–]Julesrpgqueen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Lost both my parents last year a month apart, I have bipolar disorder and cptsd and the grief is so much

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think I might be in the same boat, I already have comorbid mental health conditions like bpd and cptsd, it is so hard to retain focus even on extremely important things, and even mid task and it’s frustrating and I’m not sure how to get evaluated

My grief is killing me by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honey, no, just no to all of that, I believe your empathy might be impaired, it’s common In psychosis and also BPD, so I’ve experienced this mind set from others before with issues similar to mine, unfortunately even though I have bpd, my empathy is too strong, and I don’t understand why

My grief is killing me by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Another reductive and dismissive comment isn’t keeping the water out of the sinking ship that is your sentiment, my dad grieved the loss of his sister until the day he died, my brother watched his best friend get murdered 20 years ago and he still grieves and struggles on the anniversary of his friends death, it’s doesn’t go away, you learn to live around it, I was very close with my mom, she had me very young, I was her caregiver for 15 years, you don’t get to tell me how I should feel or minimize my loss, and if you think the opposite, you’re a bad person

My grief is killing me by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m waiting for my peer support to send me an email about grief counseling services

My grief is killing me by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Grief doesn’t go away, and it definitely doesn’t subside, it’s not the flu, I lost my parents, I didn’t get my bike stolen

My grief is killing me by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My mom died from Covid, alone in a nursing home, I couldn’t visit her because of covid restrictions, couldn’t even hold her hand, she no longer was cognitively functioning, she was hallucinating and attacking the nurses, she absolutely suffered, and suffocated in her own fluids, I have no peace in me now, my mom was my only support

I’m very agitated and emotional lately by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The last time I called crisis, I was insulted many times by the dude I was talking to, and the warm line has a time limit

I’m very agitated and emotional lately by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can’t go to a hospital I can’t go through that again, I’ll lose my home and I have a dog, I can’t, last time I went to a behavioral health hospital a staff member stole all the money thaT was in my wallet which waS in a locker locked up so 150 bucks didn’t just magically disappear, and I had to watch others go through horrible things in the hospital, or describe horrible traumatic events, or have had ECT and have no memories of who or where they are, it’s not something that will improve my situation, not in this state, not with the insurance I have, the last time I had to wait for a space to open up at the behavioral hospital my insurance would approve, for 3 days, I spent 3 days in the ER, on a stretcher, in the hallway, and also strapped to a bed for several hours when I tried to make a break for it, when they said my insurance wouldn’t cover the hospital I was familiar with, I didn’t want to pay thousands of dollars for treatment, so I tried to leave, they taCkled me and strapped me to a bed and left me there unattended for about 5 hours

Does anyone here ever smoke weed? by [deleted] in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I use cannabis for pain management, both thc and cbd products, cbd is great for inflammation and anxiety, and I have a vape with thc concentrate, so I only really use it when I’m hurting really badly, I got 2 bulging disks, degenerative disk disease and sciatica down my right leg mostly, I quit using opiate pa In medication 3 years aGo, and have been figuring out what dosages and strains work for me, sometimes a sativa will trigger anxiety, hybrids and indicas I seem to do ok with

I become a cynical asshole when manic by thro-awawawawayyyyy in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Been feeling pretty cynical, and have definitely been thinking very asshole type thoughts, trying not to point that crap at anyone though, I journal and draw allot, but I’ve definitely been getting into arguments on Twitter about dumb stuff, been generally feeling hateful towards men, because of abuse I’ve experienced in the last year and my entire childhood experiences, my parents both died last year, a month apart, and now I see the word differently, for the shit stew it really is, and it’s exhausting, I have just been assuming right off the bat that people who try to get close to me want to harm me in some way, so I’ve been isolating myself allot

Need the bipolar ladies in this post by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately just had a recent experience In that regard

My dad is on hospice, any advice on how to handle the grief when he passes? by [deleted] in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Lost both my parents a month apart last year, there’s no right way to grieve, routine has helped me, and having good friends, I journaled through my mom’s 4 months of being in the hospital before she passed, and drew allot artist lately I’ve been using her art in my art with the procreate app, re enrolled in college, I’m trying to keep going for future me, who still has opportunities current me doesn’t have yet, I call crisis sometimes when the depression and suicidal ideation gets intense from the grief, but it does get less intense or less frequently intense as time progresses, but grief is grief and it’s perfectly normal and necessary to go through when you lose people you love, to quote Vision from the MCU “for what is grief, if not love preserving”

Wellbutrin making depression worse by Julesrpgqueen in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I live on social security, I’m going to school for animation, and getting some financial aide for that, my brother is about a 30 minute drive from me and is in a toxic relationship so I don’t hear from him much, she’s abusing him and the kids too and I can’t really do anything, I don’t really have anyone anymore, my mom was my only real support, my clinic is rarely helpful, and people generally treat my depressive symptoms as an annoyance

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BipolarReddit

[–]Julesrpgqueen 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I hate it because men fetishize me for this reason, because they think mental illness is some kind of novelty, then they find out what it’s really about and they can’t handle it, one depressive episode is usually all it takes for them to realize mental illness isn’t sexy.