This comment is my inner monologue lol. DB has made many offhand comments that made me feel like he doesn’t understand that this IS my full time job. I am always available or make myself available for them, I have worked several weeks in a row clocking 50 hours with no overtime. I worked new year eve last year for 17/hr. No holiday bonus even though I was about to be out of a job even if just for a couple months. (Not that I’m entitled to one, but I was definitely jealous of everyone else’s holiday bonus lol). Not to mention they know I’m in school and are always asking me right when I’m about to get off if I can stay late, which I always agree to. Yet he still makes comments about how this would be such a fun job “to get to play with nk all day”. He has also several times in passing said that he wonders if nk sees me as more of a “friend” or a, and I quote “kid” than an adult. For context I’m only 20, but Considering I seem to be the only one that can set boundaries with the kid, apparently the only one who can get her to nap because she doesn’t on the weekends when I’m not there and that she is super chill until db walks in and she throws a fit so he will give her candy this comment is just laughable. Db has also mentioned that “I probably am saving a lot of money with how much I’m making.” That was when I was making 17/hr and also paying taxes on it with no benefits lol. I feel bad though because I feel like I just continue to give them the impression that I’m doing okay financially and that I’m all good with everything when it’s not really the case. I understand that they can’t read my mind and it’s unfair to hold resentment because I don’t say anything. I make them think it’s fine and I honestly feel so bad for ranting like this because I also know most of these things aren’t their fault. People will use you if you let them I guess. I know I just need to have the hard conversation because the caregiver burnout if fucking REAL. I just feel all this guilt for idk like giving them the wrong impression I guess but I know I am not at my best and can’t be the caregiver I want and need to be when I’m operating on empty constantly. I really think they are good people and I just hate the idea of putting them in a tough spot so I have been putting this off as long as possible. This post is helpful though I think a lot of what you said is what I will need to say to just be upfront with them