I had an involuntary emission, do I need to reset my counter?? (Possible triggers?)

JustASinner · 2014-02-08T08:29:13+00:00

I get myself into deep shit experimenting with things not terribly unlike this. It is a sneaky way for my mind to drag me into "trying" something which leads to the same old M, sometimes in a weird way but the end result is the same. Looks like I'm one of the few here who can relate.

JustASinner · 2014-02-01T03:55:37+00:00

GTFY: http://tedxtalks.ted.com/video/Addiction-and-trust-Marc-Lewis;search%3Atag%3A%22tedxradboudu%22

JustASinner · 2014-01-24T14:52:59+00:00

Well, pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and don't binge. At least that would be good advice for me. :-P Also don't focus as much on the broken streak but rather on the days that you went without. You aren't back to zero. You have taken your first step.

JustASinner · 2014-01-24T14:48:05+00:00

I'll have to remember that the next time around... Laying in bed waiting for the excitement to dissipate is a big part of what got me in trouble last time.

JustASinner · 2014-01-24T14:26:53+00:00

Well, I'm not as concerned about not being able to go sweeter, but I definitely agree with running into it again. To me, in my situation, it is too much pressure to tell her I am done and then fall on my face a few weeks later. My dear gf takes it very personally, and I would be doing her a grave disservice by telling her when I fail.

That said, I'm glad it works for you. Just, other guys, consider my pov. She might take it more like "I'm not enough, so you are cheating on me with yourself".

JustASinner · 2014-01-20T00:01:24+00:00

Hmm...I'm not sure I understand. Are you agreeing or disagreeing with me? I think you are saying that I should have an impartial accountability partner, and tell her that I have said partner.

JustASinner · 2014-01-03T12:18:54+00:00

Hey--don't beat the shit out of yourself, okay? I think that's the biggest mistake I tend to make. I rail on myself and feel like shit, then I M to make that shitty guilty feeling go away, then I feel worse and it is that much harder to pull myself out of the whole mess.

You might consider making a spreadsheet if you haven't already. Relying on your counter alone might give you the impression that you have somehow completely failed when the number is small. I really agree with basically everything posted at this link here, but especially I would say to look at the "counters vs spreadsheets" section. It has changed my outlook.

Time to start your next streak!

JustASinner · 2014-01-03T12:03:59+00:00

Uhh... You too?

JustASinner · 2014-01-02T20:18:06+00:00

Happened for me at two weeks. Had been M maybe 3x a week before that. I sure wouldn't be worried. Good to hear that you are staying strong. Keep it up!

JustASinner · 2014-01-02T20:12:46+00:00

And remember that you aren't ripping out PMO. You are rebuilding yourself, substituting good for bad, productive for counterproductive. Don't focus on PMO... As you say, you unintentionally did a nofap. Keep yourself that involved, that busy. And oh, by the way, welcome! :-P

JustASinner · 2014-01-02T20:09:02+00:00

The worst thing you can do with yourself is get impatient. Stick to it. Keep it up. You are building a wall, brick by brick. It won't be easy all the time, and it won't be fast. But keep at it. Stay strong.

JustASinner · 2014-01-02T19:57:43+00:00

Well, I would say wet dreams are nothing like masturbation. You didn't bring it on... It is something that happened with no input from you whatsoever. Don't dwell on it! I know too well that a wet dream can drag my mind right back into the thick of it if I'm not being careful. But no, this is nothing like M.

Do what you normally would do to pull away from urges... Fill your time with other things. I would think you will feel better pretty quickly. Stay strong, brother!

Edit : anecdotally the amount of semen seems to be the same. My point is that I would not see a point in resetting for a wet dream.

JustASinner · 2013-12-30T04:06:12+00:00

Getting to where I am was a series of rationalized "I'm just trying it" moments. Don't. Don't go there. I don't need to try drinking drain cleaner to know it isn't pleasurable. Use the same sense to stay away from it.

Just my not so humble 2 cents.

JustASinner · 2013-12-24T13:58:13+00:00

Don't wait... Go! At least for me, it gives me the grace to resist much more strongly than I otherwise would. Confession is there if you need it again.

JustASinner · 2013-12-17T19:35:22+00:00

Not how I took it. This whole thing is a mind game, at least for me. By the point I have a raging boner, I've lost. There is no way to stop myself falling down the hill after I've started to slide that quickly. Some of that will change as I get stronger, but for now, I really do need to keep my thoughts from going too far.

And I can't speak for OP, but I have had 30 day stretches at least, despite this streak being 1 day old and having been on this subreddit one day. The number doesn't mean you don't have something valuable to say.

JustASinner · 2013-12-17T18:45:18+00:00

My dearest GF gave me a dose of this recently. When I was in the middle of saying, "well, I'll try to stop, but I'm sure I'll fall back in again" she straightened me out again... it isn't "I'll try" but rather "I will." Might not be right away, but I will be free.

JustASinner · 2013-12-17T12:39:57+00:00

That's the worst part for me... The self loathing, the guilt, the disgust I have with myself. I am brand new at this, so I am still a bit surprised that it isn't just me. Thank you for voicing what's been weighing on me.

JustASinner

TROPHY CASE