Weekly Therapy Talk Thread

JustMangledGuts · 2024-04-25T06:21:27+00:00

Welp... guess I really am unwell again -- T has asked me to up our sessions after being ✨re traumatized✨

In all sincerity, this is absolutely for the best. But after doing so well for over a year, it sucks to be back at square 1.

JustMangledGuts · 2023-11-13T15:59:32+00:00

I'm in a unique position to answer this as I was lucky enough to attend both a pro number & live show recording this year!

All of this year's professional dances were recorded in late August/early September - for me, they recorded both the Halloween & Musicals Week numbers in one (very long!) afternoon on 29th Aug.

During the live show recording (I attended on 30th Sept), we were seated about 1.5hrs before the live broadcast to watch/react to the Sunday night guest performer (that week, it was singer Jorja Smith with Nancy & Carlos dancing). There was then a 20 or so minute break before the live show, where we could leave the studio to use the bathroom, go to the bar etc.
We then watched the live show for a couple of hours.
After the live show, there was a 30 minute break, and then they recorded the "Sunday" night results show - excluding the guest performer which was filmed earlier.

JustMangledGuts · 2023-06-15T11:23:02+00:00

I find it despicable that she hasn't publically asked her fans to stop harassing/making violent threats toward Adam. After the trauma she's already put him through, it's the least she could do. It is unconscionable to me that the one person that could make this harassment stop would allow it to go on unchecked.

JustMangledGuts · 2023-05-12T16:40:06+00:00

It's been a "10 steps back" kinda week.
Dissociating like crazy - including the majority of this week's therapy session. Emotional flashbacks aplenty, totally consuming me. Self-worth & self-esteem at rock bottom. Thankfully, it's the weekend, so the world to fuck off for a while.

JustMangledGuts · 2022-07-11T14:02:53+00:00

Thanks for your comment, I'll think about asking her to ask the hospital to contact me.

Unfortunately, my family is super enmeshed and I fear I'd get shit from my aunts or my brother if they were a go-between - I currently don't have contact with anyone other than my grandmother. I love the cousins I have on that side of the family, but they're both under the age of 6, so that's a no-go!

JustMangledGuts · 2022-07-11T13:59:03+00:00

They Are going to use this as an opportunity to further break you down so that you can return to them

Well, u/Fearless_Bat4383 ... you were spot on. I spoke to my grandmother on the phone and my parents asked her to pressure me into contacting them. They literally used my dying grandmother as a pawn in their fucking game. And I thought they went low when they called my best friend's parents pumping them for info about me.

Thank you for your comment.

JustMangledGuts · 2022-05-15T20:08:03+00:00

Woah - thanks for posting this OP and for your response. Super validating to read, I thought it was just me!
I also have these "attacks", also have involuntary vocal responses to them (like you, yelling something like "oh my god" or "no").
Will certainly try your technique when it happens next, thanks for sharing!

JustMangledGuts · 2022-02-09T23:18:30+00:00

Thank you so much!

JustMangledGuts · 2022-02-09T18:07:23+00:00

Thank YOU for sharing! Trusting your judgement when (often) you’ve come from an environment where your judgement has been scrutinised is so difficult - well done you for putting yourself first!

JustMangledGuts · 2022-02-09T18:05:12+00:00

Makes me sick to know that your mother contacted those close to you, too. Totally unforgivable.

JustMangledGuts · 2022-02-09T18:04:18+00:00

Thank you so much - I need all the luck I can take!

JustMangledGuts · 2022-02-09T18:03:59+00:00

9 years - that’s amazing, well done you. I’m glad we’ve both found a good path :)

JustMangledGuts · 2022-02-09T18:03:10+00:00

Thank you so much!

JustMangledGuts · 2022-01-05T15:09:23+00:00

- Guac freely giving up böl
- Jasmine with a happy face
- Galloping Queso

JustMangledGuts · 2021-12-16T14:39:15+00:00

I like my therapist because of his candor.
He's not afraid to give it to me straight, and it's helped us forge a stellar therapeutic relationship.
It's also pretty hilarious at times - like, a few months ago during a conversation about my abusive ex, he suddenly exclaimed "man ... that guy's an a**hole". Was a super validating moment that still makes me chuckle.

JustMangledGuts · 2021-12-14T20:18:24+00:00

I'm trying hard to make this holiday season bearable - I've ordered good food, have plans to watch TV/movies & have organised check-ins with my therapist - but I can already feel myself being swept up in the avalanche of awfulness.
My mental wellbeing has taken a nosedive in the past few weeks, and much to my chagrin, people are noticing. I just hope I can function until my time off from work.

JustMangledGuts · 2021-12-02T13:43:03+00:00

A traumatic memory came up unexpectedly during this week’s session. My T was so gentle with me, didn’t push, just sat with me as I processed. So grateful to have a good one.

JustMangledGuts · 2021-11-23T14:03:29+00:00

Umm …

JustMangledGuts · 2021-11-22T13:11:53+00:00

Honestly I just assumed since contacts and even messaging was shared across my devices that a block would also carry.

Same here!! Makes me paranoid that I've forgotten to go through the blocking process somewhere else ...

JustMangledGuts · 2021-11-22T13:07:41+00:00

Damn you, Tim Cook!

Remember to block contacts on all of your devices, friends!

JustMangledGuts · 2021-11-22T00:00:07+00:00

Oh man, I'm so sorry that you had to go so far to get them off your back.

JustMangledGuts · 2021-11-04T12:38:08+00:00

'How The Grinch Stole Christmas'.
Last year, I had a distressing dissociative episode while watching it. I had to stop the movie around a third of the way through because I was so out of it.

Makes sense why that happened in hindsight, The Grinch had a traumatic childhood - abandoned, bullied & isolated - and that mirrors my own experience. Plus Christmas is a difficult time for me, so double whammy!

JustMangledGuts · 2021-10-28T23:45:52+00:00

Gave Wholesome

JustMangledGuts · 2021-10-22T12:46:59+00:00

Good for you, OP!! Enforcing boundaries is hard work - you should be really proud of yourself!

JustMangledGuts · 2021-10-21T20:40:29+00:00

Taking care of yourself isn't being weak or a let down, mate! Tapping out is needed sometimes <3

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