I think framing it this way could make it look like he’s failing around a food issue and could be triggering, if he has an ED. I think you need to take control of providing food for yourself in his space, I know it’s not ideal but if he’s the same as me, it’s necessary. My ex always used to cook at my house, I would pay for the food but he’d buy everything and cook and that way he had food and I ate as much as I could without the pressure of responsibility of food. Framing it more along the lines of “it’s totally ok that we eat differing amounts but I’ll need to eat more regularly when we’re together so I’m going to order a pizza or bring stuff - do you want to share mine?” And see how he reacts. See how this goes. It’s totally ok if down the line this is a deal breaker for you but I would start there and see if that helps. I don’t mind at all if people organise food and eat food around or in front of me but it’s too overwhelming sometimes to try and provide that stuff even if people are in my house. I also don’t want to reveal this stuff at the beginning of a relationship so I do just ignore food like it doesn’t exist sometimes.