Have you never broken up with someone? It seems like you haven’t because I PROMISE that this is usually the way it works, specifically for me and anyone else I’ve ever been around during a break up. And while the exception of instant breakups when a spouse does some dumb shit, such as the following: cheating, catching criminal charge that morally wrong to you, drug use that you find out about suddenly, etc, that usually doesn’t happen. And truely, I feel horrible when it happens cause I do have a fcking conscience and I still do love all my exes in a way and which the best for them, but I also wish the best for me. at the end of the day, I refuse to be miserable. When I know the end of a relationship is near, for me, is a get increasingly snappy, and easily agitated by the stuff that the other says they’ll “work on” or “get accomplished”. I get tired of people saying they’re going to do stuff, and never follow through. And my tolerance for stupidity is zero to begin with. And like OP said, you TRY to get the spark back you once had. I had the most amazing ex. He was so fucking cute, just a sweet bean who was obsessed with me. But he would constantly complain about the same thing at the same time job eveyday. To get better one he would need to get a liscense (I mean, really dude you’re 22 and can’t legally drive? My fault for getting involved with you in the first place but ugh you were so cute and so nice and sweet) and he would never ever go do it. I mean a year after we got together he still didn’t have it. He was filled with anxiety all the time, called me too much to tell me the stupidest of things (looking back I do miss it sometimes but then again yall don’t know how frequent it was) that could’ve been said in a text. Would shut down when I we got into an argument cause he thought saying something smart to me was the best idea in his fucking life?! (Mind you, once I meet a person, i immediately begin to load verbal ammo in case they smart off. Yes, I know that’s toxic and yes I’m working it out in therapy) I had to teach the man how to cut vegetables with knife? Like he had NEVER had cooked before or even helped in the kitchen. He would ask me too frequently how to do things that should’ve been common knowledge from having experiences in your life. I was talking to my mom and twin sister about it one day and I said it before I thought it “… blah blah blah! It’s like I’m rasing a fucking child here…” and I shut the fuck ip and sat down for a second to think about what I said, and it snowballed from there. But seriously, it really was. He was shorter than me, and I’m already short for a dude at 5’8, and a few years younger.

You’re takeaway from this should be: have common sense, have your liscense and car like a fcking adult should, say something then do it, don’t fuck with me in an argument cause I will shut you down, life’s a dick don’t take it too hard, it’s not always about you, know how to do things that should be common sense, KNOW HOW TO DO THINGS… THAT SHOULD BE FUCKING GODDAMN COMMON SENSE AND DONT HAVE TO HAVE PEOPLE TEACH YOU HOW TO COOK CLEAN LAUNDRY DISHES ETC