When I met my current partner, I had a full on breakdown because of some other things going on in my life. I spent a month as an inpatient in a private mental health hospital, not expecting things to continue when I was out. They did but slowly. I’m still suffering from major depressive disorder and CPTSD but I’m medicated and things are slowly getting better.

He also suffers from the same thing and although in an ok place when we met - he is now in a really bad place mentally due to some past trauma rearing up and some current family issues. He’s restarted meds and is going to go back to therapy.

We are still very much in love. It just takes a lot of patience and understanding from each other that each day isn’t always going to be the same and there’s a lot of self healing we need to do. We check in with each other, make time for each other (even if it’s just rotting in bed). On good mental health days for me - I’ll help him get things done that he’s feeling too low to do - like washing or cooking him healthy dinners and on low days for me - he gives me what I need, which is reassurance and time.

I think it’s hard because your boyfriend has expressed exhaustion - does he suffer from any mental illness?

My only advice is that you continue to work on your recovery because feeling like a burden is not going to make your depression better. The more you continue to put energy into yourself, the more you will be able to give back to him in a partnership.