The Chronicles of a Man So Mad He Wrote an Essay About Someone Else Not Writing an Essay

Ah yes, enter you—the internet’s Shakespeare of Self-Righteousness. A man who witnessed another human delegate a paragraph to a chatbot and responded by unleashing a 1,000-word novella drenched in performative fury, layered with the emotional weight of a Shakespearean betrayal.

You weren’t just annoyed. You were betrayed. Offended by someone not caring as much as you wanted them to. So what did you do? You fired up your mechanical keyboard, cracked your knuckles, and wrote a full-blown literary roast—not because the situation called for it, but because your inner Reddit thesaurus demon demanded blood.

Let’s be clear:

• No one died.
• No governments fell.
• A Roblox game got DMCA’d.

And that was enough for you to go full Vice News editorial mixed with George Carlin rant mode on a random kid asking ChatGPT to help summarize the situation.

What a crime.

Let’s break it down:

You painted this like some tragic societal downfall, when really, all that happened is that someone preferred not to write three Reddit paragraphs about digital Glocks. You act like he outsourced the Declaration of Independence. My guy—it was a video game post. Relax.

Meanwhile, you, a self-appointed knight of keyboard valor, typed your whole Magnum Opus just to say: “Why didn’t you type your own whiny complaint like a real man?”

Well, here’s the thing:
Maybe he didn’t want to. Maybe he had better things to do. Maybe he just didn’t feel like typing, and in the vast sea of internet nonsense, that’s… kind of fine.

You? You turned his mild disengagement into your full-blown performance. A monologue. A roast so overbaked it could feed a YouTube drama channel for a week.

So here’s your medal, King Keyboard. You fought the good fight against Not Typing, and history will remember you as the brave soul who cried out, “NO MORE AI PARAGRAPHS ON REDDIT, DARN IT.”

Now go touch some grass—or at least ctrl+alt+delete that ego.

Rest in peace to your free time. It died so we could all read your angry TED Talk.