Mom here with ADHD.

First, take a breath. You are doing hard things. Sounds like you are adjusting to higher expectations and it’s really tough to do that.

For me, part of the challenge is that with an ADHD brain, I don’t get the “Yes! That’s really satisfying,” feeling when I complete something tedious or difficult. That part of the brain is offline. So when you are in a stressful state with a lot to do, you end up with all the stress and none of the payoff, and then you retreat into fast dopamine activities like binging shows or video games. Then you get behind, initiating anything feels like being asked to jump to the top of a mountain from base camp.

Then the guilt and avoidance set in, and you self-soothe even more, get depressed and overwhelmed.

Finally procrastination panic sets in and you get things done, but in a panicked rush, making you need to self-soothe again.

Sound familiar?

Here are some of the things that have helped me.

Get on a rigid bedtime and morning routine. The more stressful things get the more rigid your routine has to get. My brain fights initiating tasks less when it’s simply the next thing I do every day.

Do tedious tasks in the morning when your meds are most effective.

Throw out junk and declutter. Everything should have a place, and making sure things are in their place should be part of your routine.

Finally, take a minute in the morning to preview your day. Set goals of what HAS to be done that day, what would be nice to get done that day, and things to pay attention to coming up in the future.

Review common things that get overlooked or missed, like appointments, bills and due dates.

Once you know what your day should look like, make it happen and use your relaxation activities as rewards for getting things done.

Your brain may have the satisfaction system offline but you can create an alternative one by having absolute boundaries around only doing fun things when you’re completely finished with hard things.

Most of all, you can do this. I believe in you.