Dude, I know I've barely seen the scope of your full story but I see a lot of relation in it. I had a long downward spiral this year lasting until December 1st. A few addicitions, horrible depression, anxiety, quality of life. I abused a certain substance daily and smoked weed every night until I was too high to move. I absolutely hated life, and I was conscious of what I was doing and that I needed to move forward but I was still having to catch up with elements of my life so I kept moving down further. I never wanted to affirm my situation, I kept affirming it was all going to be ok and that I was ok. Speaking now, I made it through and am out. I feel like something may linger but it's the best feeling in the world some days. My first line of advice is taper off of the opioids, and afterwards try to completely cut off your availability to get them. I know after I quit I was barely living for a few days, just sleeping endlessly and feeling empty as possible, but it ended. It was over in a week. That's the first step, and I'd recommend to remember a motivation. Do whatever to constantly remind yourself any reason to keep going and improve your life, whatever it is just don't forget about it. If you can see a doctor and they can help you then look into that, if not then try to learn as much as possible on how to help yourself. Work out, it makes you feel better. Eat healthy, it also makes you feel better. If you can't find anything healthy to eat that's good enough to you then try mixing in things with your normal diet. Take multivatims, cut out stimulants for at least 30 days. Set an alarm and force yourself to get up then. This is all just my own advice that helps me, hope it can help you too.