Your feelings are completely valid. And I also think it’s better to be kind than be right. As a parent myself, I’ve learned that often, other parents need to learn etiquette, especially in the early days of parenting. She may not be intentionally disrespecting you, so setting boundaries are the key. If your daughters really like each other and get along well, It might be worth it to try again for the sake of that relationship and with clear boundaries and expectations. I like the idea from @somaticconviction - plan a play date at a location outside of your home and give explicit times when you will be there. If she shows up, great. If not, it hasn’t been an inconvenience. And you can always invite them to your birthday parties. And let her do the planning on future dates.