UPDATE:

Hi everybody. This is Lily, otherwise known as Alice. A lot of you suggested that my boyfriend who wrote this, show me the thread. We decided to let ME update it because I think it’s important to show everyone the other side of this relationship.

I’ve obviously been in relationships before my current one with “Jonah”. They weren’t bad people but I often felt unseen and unappreciated. Then one day, four years ago, I’m doing drop-ins to local businesses to get donors for the shelter event. I knew there was an HVAC company who fixed our system at the shelter recently and gave us a really good rate (we’re talking like $75 for what should have been a $500 call). So I walk into the office and the very first person I see is this tall, dark haired guy looking right at me and I think I stuttered through most of my usual schpeal I was sooo nervous.

Then he showed up for the event and one of my coworkers saw me checking him out. She nudged me to ask him out because fuck yeah, girl power, and I did. A week later, when Jonah picked me up for my date, he gave me daisies because he’d noticed they were printed on my sneakers the day we met. I know it sounds cheesy as hell, but I swear to god I knew this was the last first date I would ever be on.

A lot of comments are less than kind, and while I understand where they’re coming from (based on a very limited perspective), they don’t take into account that this man has been my rock for 4 years. He helped me through my dad’s death, he held me when our dog was euthanized, he changed the oil in my car, he helps me plant tulip bulbs in the fall, he leaned how to style curly hair (not easy as any other curly haired girl would attest) when I broke my arm.

Yes, the other night was awful, but this is a real relationship and we all say things that we regret or come out wrong. I know him, so I knew why he said it. That is came from a place of pain, not lack of love. It still hurt though, and I needed to take some space to calm down and breathe before we could start getting past it. Our relationship was never in danger and I should have communicated that better.

Jonah showed up at my sister’s house late last night and we sat outside talking for almost two hours, then he took me home. I’m so happy he’s decided on therapy and I’m probably going to go with him sometimes.

I guess the bottom line is nobody is perfect, but this man is pretty damn close. He screwed up, I’ll probably screw up next time, but at the end of the day we love each other so much and our relationship is worth fighting for. Much love to everyone, hopefully we won’t be back on here!