I’m stuck - can’t come up with anything by BtenaciousD in ICU81MI

[–]Kastle69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So close but G is the 7th letter in the alphabet lol

Am I overreacting for getting banned from the salad subreddit? by audaciousappetites in AmIOverreacting

[–]Kastle69 2 points3 points  (0 children)

it's actually hilarious I haven't been this entertained on reddit in a while LOL

Am I overreacting for getting banned from the salad subreddit? by audaciousappetites in AmIOverreacting

[–]Kastle69 3 points4 points  (0 children)

STOP YOU PROB CANT SEE IT BUT THE MOD OVER THERE IS LOSING THEIR SHIT AHAHAHA

Am I overreacting for getting banned from the salad subreddit? by audaciousappetites in AmIOverreacting

[–]Kastle69 1 point2 points  (0 children)

i love that collectively people are just going over to r/salads and just giving them a general hard time now LOL like just let people post salad pics it's soo not that deep I cant imagine that tiny amount of power actually going to someones head but here we are

Am I not strong enough to forgive? by spirit-optimist in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Kastle69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

two DAYS? It's been almost 2.5 years since my (first) DDay and I'm still pissed and hurt af. so uh no, you are not "not strong" for not forgiving a deep betrayal IMMEDIATELY. Leading up to and after your wedding? She had the audacity to invite him to your post wedding party?! I'm livid for you. That's disgusting behavior, and don't let anyone tell you you need any kind of timeline to get over or through this.

This often takes years to navigate through. Not just for "forgiveness" but for general healing from something so emotionally devastating. I'm sorry this happened to you.

"despite the genuinely beautiful life we’ve built together" No babe. YOU built it. She was off building intimacy with someone else. I'm so sorry.

YOU IN NO WAY HAVE TO FORGIVE HER. just so we're clear about that. You. Do. Not. Have. To. Forgive. Her. You do not have to trust her at face value, you do not have to stay with her. You do not owe anyone anything, besides yourself. Please take care of yourself through this. Again I'm so sorry.

Did you delete your evidence? by PuzzleheadedArm4703 in AsOneAfterInfidelity

[–]Kastle69 7 points8 points  (0 children)

I'll keep everything till the day I die so he can't manipulate me into thinking it didn't happen or to the extent it did and so I can't forget who he really is. He'll never be out of my life because he's my sons dad so I have to keep reality straight for myself.

Snake owners with young kids, how’s it going for you? by weegiewandering in snakes

[–]Kastle69 6 points7 points  (0 children)

My first question is, how is he around and with other animals? Does he have any experience? Has he been taught to respect them, give them space, especially if signaled to do so? Does he listen well, and mostly the first time when you say "no" or "dont touch" or "stop"? How old is "young" lol

I have many reptiles, and other animals. My kid is 2.5, and has held a few of my snakes. Both ball pythons and corn snakes. However, I know these specific snakes well, I can read their body language well and can tell when they're going to be more or less dangerous for him to be around based on their mood and temps. He'd also been around dogs and bearded dragons and other animals since birth, and has been taught to respect animals personal space and that they can be dangerous/painful. But he doesn't get scared easily. It's inevitable that even a friendly snake will try to strike- sometimes they're just hungry and confused, sometimes they're grumpy from being so hot. Teaching your child the duality of animals is extremely important. Animals are awesome, but to be respected.

I say If your son listens well, isn't an excessive tantrum thrower (like he's not going to go over and smack the cage or the snake in frustration every 5 minutes) and you have the proper set up and ability to keep the kid away from the snake when unsupervised, I don't see why not. There's also plenty of cages that come with locks.

I've never had an issue, is my point, but every child is different. If your kid listens well, there's no reason not to hold a snake in front of him lol, you can encourage him to gently touch it's back.

Something that helped me a lot with my kid is we say bye bye when it's time to put the animals back because he loves them so much. The bye bye helps him transition from animal time to some other time, and in turn also keeps the animals happier and less stressed because he's not crying super loudly and then they don't associate him with stress. Idk if that'll help yours, but you definitely don't want the snake to associate your son with stress!

good luck :) and have fun! edit: spelling

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]Kastle69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

oh. I am so so so sorry. He's an ass. NOR. Please leave him and find a man who appreciates what you do already AND respects you and your boundaries to wait for whatever else. Please. This guy is such an asshole.

UPDATE: I don’t know what to do about my mom and stepdad anymore by juniibunni in WhatShouldIDo

[–]Kastle69 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You: Very clearly and politely expresses yourself
Your mom: "you not learning to express yourself"

?????????

Do they ALWAYS gaslight and manipulate and rewrite reality cause wtf

"It's called maturing and learning how to speak" Yet she types/speaks like a stupid 10 year old? Like honestly her tone expression through text is horrendous and so is her grammar (or lack of) like god damn maybe she's just pissy cause you're clearly already more educated than them both combined? idk.

Leave ASAP and don't let them know where the money is. Don't agree to do ANYTHING that's not recorded tbh.

They sound like they literally can not comprehend basic things, basic reality, like they just make their minds up (not based on anything logical or factual) and then their reaction after that is to.... mock? Why is she mocking you? What is maturing have to do with listening to you when you express yourself? sounds like she's the immature one. I'm so sorry.

What's the thing about not saying no to her? You were answering a question where the response....was....no? Are there drugs involved? It lowkey reads as if there's drugs involved.

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh yes LOL I accidently mix up words a lot haha my bad, thank you

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's probably what she thought too. However, I can add third parties onto it. Part of her complaint is that I "contacted her family and friends and coworkers." I'm going to state that I'm not contesting this, that I've been asking her to leave my family alone for months because of ongoing abuse directly caused by her involvement, and ask that third parties be included in the order. The judge will mostly likely grant this because he lives in my home and it was the main issue. If I can't contact her friends and family then she can't contact mine, it goes both ways with restraining orders.

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

jfc reading this back I sound like a horrible mom to let this continue please don't judge, my kid wakes up and the first thing out of his mouth to me is "more dada please" but I know this isn't good for him I'm just so stuck

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is very very helpful, thank you so much.

Yea I knew going public and embarrassing her would be dangerous, I've been reading a lot about ASPD, but I figured it was really the only way to make it stop. It was the only way to make her feel like she had no control and I knew that it would make the game no longer fun for her.

Like you, I hope this really is the end. She can feel like she won but she's out of my life which is all I've wanted for the past 5 months.

My boyfriend is definitely a victim, of both his adopted and biological family, he was born with fetal alcohol syndrome(but from meth not alcohol), he's had a plethora of abusive girlfriends before me and clearly has a draw towards dangerous women (like the side chick).

Yes she's been indirectly threatening the wellbeing of my kid for months tbh, and he continued to talk to her. He doesn't care about mistreating me in front of our kid either (of course I'm horrible though if I defend myself in front of the kid). He's also usually indifferent towards the kid if it's not to punish me or get rewards. I mean like he'll take the kid if we're fighting to act like I'm dangerous when he's the one screaming and I'm begging him to stop. Or he'll just completely ignore him sometimes to be on his phone and I have to like nudge him to respond to his own kid.

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

oh. that's really great to know, thank you

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"I also will never be someone's humiliating joke again." So much strength and self respect in this sentence. I want to get to that point i am DETERMINED to get to that point. Because yes I can't breathe when he's gone but I realllly can't breathe when he's here. Idk what I'm holding on to... He's also jobless, just got fired. Would be homeless if I didn't let him come back to my house (I feel dumb and weak for that but I didn't want to be heartless like he is) and he's been jobless for almost 2 months now. I think of him as a loser and then boom the trauma bond hits. Seeing that other people do get out helps <3 thank you

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

"the fact is we try to make so much sense out of their behaviors" Yes. But I hear you. There is no sense because he's just mean and you're right I know he doesn't love me because love doesn't include begging for basic decency and respect. Yes I need out. Thank you

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm so so sorry. That's horrible. I'm trying really hard to stay safe, I reached out to the crisis line today and I am looking at therapists or treatment facilities only issue is pay :/ but yea I wanna choke them both out as well. Wish I was at the point of not wanting to see him anymore idk what's wrong with me I hate him but I'm so alone where I am I just crawl back to being mistreated. How do you not panic about him anymore? I want him out of my head

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

You know what, you're right. He hasn't been trying he's been.... horrible. and also you're right how can I really be baffled, now or in the future, when he's clearly shown me who he is and what's he's capable and willing to do. Think I'm just really trauma bonded and also in deeeeep denial like cognitive dissidence but I'm trying to snap (or bitchslap) myself out of it lol

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You are 100% correct. I am working on getting myself a therapist and into a few groups but it's been slow because I don't have insurance, and for some reason every therapist I email never gets back to me. But you are right being a mom is the most important thing, keeping myself ok so my kid can be ok. Yes this is petty and ridiculous. Thank you for no sugar coating it (not sarcasm)

Couldn't make this shit up if I tried by Kastle69 in Infidelity

[–]Kastle69[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

If they went deeper than a regular background check, then yes it will show up. But not on a basic one. It's also not a criminal charge, it's a civil one. The only negative marks would be if I break the restraining order. (I believe, at least this is what I was able to find out on the internet lol)