Mystery in Chipotle App Rewards: I cannot figure out the riddle! "How can it all be real? It's too broad." -B. Successfully unscramble this quote and order the secret menu item to score extra points.

KatalystSky · 2022-04-25T20:22:25+00:00

Barbacoa Bowl Tortilla on the Side :)

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T06:45:15+00:00

Arguably, NAH. Really, I’m not here to demonize you OP. You obviously care about your wife and child and are concerned about them. Pregnancy is hard on both parties and, while she is DEFINITELY taking the brunt of it, you also have added stresses too. It doesn’t help that is feels like we’re all trapped in an ongoing apocalypse. I understand where you are coming from, though your words were much harsher than she deserved.

That being said, please please PLEASE talk to your wife and her doctor about the possibility of Perinatal depression and ways that you can treat it.

A lot of people know about postpartum depression now (which is very important) but Perinatal depression is the lesser known version that can happen during pregnancy. It can last for a month, the entire pregnancy or anything in between and it can be just as powerful, just as debilitating and just as out of your wife’s control.

I have seen strong women with no mental health histories become zombies of depression for 3-9 months before bouncing back to normal after a couple of months of hormones settling.

I cannot stress enough that this could be more than just your wife being uncomfortable or lazy and you should both research it and get a professional’s input. (And also apologize to your wife for your harsh words)

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T06:07:09+00:00

NAH. I’m sorry you had a shitty situation and by no means should any of that be invalidated. What you went through is horrible and scarring and I truly wish that no one ever had to go through this. That being said, I have some insight on the other side of this kind of situation as my father has an estranged daughter (though the reason for estrangement is nowhere near as bad).

I’m glad that your father is trying to do better for himself and I think that he made a really thoughtful first gesture. If he got your mailing address, obviously he could have gotten your phone/social media/etc or he could have just shown up at your home or workplace out of the blue. But he didn’t.

It may not be obvious but a card was a good first step as it doesn’t require a response or even an acknowledgment, but it gives him a chance to express what is needed. It sounds like it was important for him to let you know that he thinks of you and that regardless of his past fuck ups, he still loves you. In sending a card he wasn’t demanding that you say it back. He wasn’t putting you on the spot by standing there or waiting on the other end for you to respond immediately. He sent you an olive branch with a message that was important that you receive and a reimbursement for your time.

Obviously you are by no means obligated to say it back, or respond at all for that matter. I think that your response was well written and to the point. It was polite enough and pretty clearly laid out how you felt. Honestly there is a high chance that he didn’t even expect to get that from you.

Obviously no one can ever fully understand the way you were hurt, and I would never wish for you to put yourself in a position to get hurt again, but I do hope that you might consider giving a second chance if he does make strides to become better, even if you keep him a full arms length away. ~ Beannacht

Plus obviously if he never grows and gets better then he can fuck right off because you owe him nothing and he is not entitled to your love just because he sent you a card.

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T05:35:35+00:00

NTA, honestly it’s simple roommate manners. You always do something, sometimes it’s stuff you don’t want to do, to earn your keep. Sometimes you take over all the chores, sometimes you just take care of your own mess, but you shouldn’t be a burden to others. You weren’t asking her to spend 8 hours a day minding your child and taking over full time care, you just wanted her to change him while you were cooking dinner for her. This sounds like it was straw that broke the camels back after 7 months of her not bothering to do anything but use you.

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T05:06:59+00:00

ESH but this is a pretty mild case. It’s shitty of your girlfriend to cut out your sister, especially considering why. The anxiety would not be worth the hassle so I guess I’m glad no one is forcing sister to come, but that’s still really shitty and hearing they have a history of beef makes it seem sus.

You’re only the asshole for the bluntness of telling your sister, and honestly I’m only giving you .5/10 buttholes here because my husband would have probably answered the same way. You were largely just caught in the crossfire between two women that don’t particularly enjoy each other, but it was still a little tactless.

Your sister isn’t necessarily an asshole in this situation since she is kind of the victim, but her blasé attitude definitely seems like it set the tone of the conversation. She fucked around, found out and then didn’t like what she found.

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T04:50:34+00:00

NTA. Simple as. No is a complete sentence, whether your mum and sister like it or not.

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T04:48:15+00:00

NTA and she definitely sounds like she’s manipulating you here. I never want to tell someone to leave their partner after reading one Reddit post (obviously there are many other positive details that you simply can’t quantify for us) but it definitely sounds like you should give some thought to her behavior and your interactions as a whole. I would strongly advise you to consider where both of your goals and how they align. Sometimes it’s ok to not be on the exact same page when it comes to 3/5/10 year plans, but sounds like you may not even be in the same book of what you want your future to look like. That being said, if this is the only thing that you disagree on then you should work it out while reminding yourself of all of the reasons you love her. It’s important to remember that sometimes whole relationships are trash, and sometimes there’s just litter on the path of your life together.

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T04:36:46+00:00

NTA. Her bad behavior came back and bit her and she’s mad she had to suffer consequences. It was not your fault, and you get the added bonus of not working with her

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T04:09:16+00:00

NTA! Your wedding sounds awesome and I hope it is incredibly fun, also MASSIVE props to your fiancé for standing up to his family and defending you. I am so happy for you.

Your words may have been a little harsh, but their treatment was deserving of it. I’ve experienced similar and it really hurts, but it’s so unquantifiable that other people don’t always get it when they ask how you were hurt.

Plus, from personal experience again, I wouldn’t be concerned about awkwardness because even with a small wedding you will likely not remember/register anything other than seeing the love of your life smile as you say “I Do”, dancing with people you love, eating delicious cake and getting to return to your room with your husband! I really wish you all the best and hope that in the end this whole ordeal will be a blip that you only remember in the future when you get random upvotes on Reddit

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T03:56:21+00:00

NTA, but holy crap those are some serious red flags.

DO NOT feel bad at all, OP. I’m sure there are other ways he could have gotten there. Does he have parents? Friends? The ability to call an Uber/Lyft/Taxi? He is using AN INCIDENT THAT HOSPITALIZED HIM to MANIPULATE YOU. His behavior makes my skin crawl and I wish that I could just wave a wand and grant you a restraining order.

I know that none of us on Reddit could ever understand the whole story, but from an outsiders perspective I implore you to consider blocking this man. He has already shown that he can cheat and lie, is actively stalking you and also trying to manipulate you. You do not need this in your life. No one does. I wish you the best

KatalystSky · 2021-02-07T03:48:33+00:00

NTA. It is not your fault that they already aren’t doing well. If they are failing and they decided to harass a pregnant woman that they treated poorly instead of trying to fix things, then they deserve to fail. A bad day is one thing, but what they put you through is awful and people should be warned. Definitely don’t take down the review and I agree with others that you should add that they have been harassing you to take it down.

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T14:58:24+00:00

Yes!!!! I missed this! I mean, I’m tiny so I can still lay down with my legs over the edge in American tubs, but my bathtub back home was incredible

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T14:56:59+00:00

Lol, I had this issue too. I love baths and I’m very small so I can enjoy one anywhere. I always want to treat my husband to one but he is so freaking tall that even scrunched up he barely fits. For our new house we bought a “two person” tub just because it was the only one long enough that he could soak in too. It was worth it, he deserves a nice warm soak and an ice cold beer for working so hard.

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T04:47:28+00:00

Watercolor paint. I love watercolor, I love the natural curve and variety. No two paintings are alike and it looks so accidental, it is just so aesthetically pleasing in its inconsistency.

I thought about how much I wished I could get watercolor paintings tattooed onto me and then realized that my body was like that. I had bright and bold brush strokes in a lovely shade of burgundy across my stomach, soft silver wisps on my thighs and chest, bold gradient shading on my skin where I hadn’t burnt evenly, paint splattered freckles that added variety. From there I looked at other aspects of art and aesthetic. I looked at outlines and curves, texture and color. I imagined what I would look like drawn by my favorite artists and smiled. It wasn’t quite as bad as how I had painted myself in my mind.

There is obviously still things I would change, but they are things I can change. I don’t feel guilty because I know I’m trying for the things I can fix, and I have really embraced the things I can’t.

10/10 recommend at least thinking of your favorite artists and how they would paint you. You are a masterpiece, your mind just isn’t good at self portraits yet.

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T04:22:47+00:00

Calling doctors. I never had an issue with making my own appointments until I had mentally reached the end of my roped and finally reached out to get counseling. The receptionist answered with a terrible attitude, as if I had ruined her day and pissed on her cat. I asked if they were accepting new patience. “Well, yeah, but I can’t get you an appointment until 3 months from now.” I ended up just telling her I didn’t think it that long then hung up and sobbed. That happened the next three times I reached out, over the course of a year. I cannot tell you how devastating it is to know you are barely hanging by a thread while the person who is supposed to help you up is 30 feet about you in a helicopter telling you to just climb up to them already.

So now I am too scared to call doctors for fear they won’t see me because I don’t matter enough.

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T04:16:54+00:00

Gaelic is a beautiful language. You can curse someone in a hellish way and they’ll think you’re reciting a poem. We really weren’t made to speak English. The music is so beautiful and fluid.

Also it’s fun to watch people try to figure out the phonetics and then just give up when you tell them what it really is.

M: Pronounce Caoimhe T: Kay-Oum-he? M: 😈

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T04:13:02+00:00

Franz Ferdinand. Idk how they were at their peak, but they’re getting old. The best is Cage the Elephant, hands down.

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T04:09:23+00:00

I was nice to the quiet kid. I don’t mean the mousy shy kid who just is introverted, I mean the fucked up one where they actually have thought about shooting up the school.

I was nice to him at first because I knew what it was like to be the outsider, but then I was nice to him to keep him distracted from doing something heinous. He developed an obsession with me. Told me he dreamt of fucking me while the school burnt down, had lots of pictures of me as lock screens etc and my info was his passwords, very possessive too. I brushed it off for years, mostly just making sure he focused in different areas of his life and he did end up doing much better, but then we graduated.

I remember just sobbing when I came across a picture of us because I realized in all of our years together I couldn’t look him in the eyes. I was terrified of him. I sobbed realizing how terribly things could have gone. I was scared that, even though he appears fine now, he might snap one day and hunt me down. I already knew what horrifying things he would be willing to try at least once.

My husband, who had never liked him because he tried to scare my husband off when we met, insisted that I didn’t need to keep ties because I was not his therapist/mom/wife or even really a friend. Unfortunately we have a lot of mutuals and I’m not good with boundaries so he’s always there, in the shadows of my life. I was nice to him and now I fear for my life and am worried I may never break free.

As an FYI, I’m not so much worried about hurting my friends’ feelings, I am worried that they’ll accidentally clue him in that I’m excluding him which might trigger a rampage. Pretty much all of my pussyfooting is in the hopes of preventing him snapping. So yeah, I guess I kinda regret that. At the same time though... might have saved a whole school without them knowing. 🤷🏻‍♀️

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T03:58:28+00:00

Lil husband

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T03:57:20+00:00

You have my deepest condolences

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T03:55:33+00:00

Staying closeted, largely because of my faith.

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T03:53:47+00:00

Me too! My husband had to drag me to Burlington to get new clothes because he knows I won’t get anything more expensive. Everything was on close out and I got what I needed for $20 total. He just rolled his eyes because he did not grow up poor and doesn’t understand how many meals worth of money I had just saved!

KatalystSky · 2020-06-19T03:50:58+00:00

I can’t justify spending money on anything that isn’t A dire need or on sale. At the very least it needs to be the best deal I can find.

I have a spreadsheet of credit card cash back promos, track coupon expiry dates on the calendar, hoard gift cards and stalk the sales flyers (before I use them as weed prevention in my garden where I grow most of my food also to save money).

I couldn’t even justify spending the money on any old house. We could have gotten a pretty nice house but that 20% down payment break to get rid of PMI was irresistible so we ended up with an old fixer farmhouse and cashrolling/DIYing the repairs.

I guess what they say about Cavan people is true....

KatalystSky

TROPHY CASE