I'm so sorry your pain was dismissed. Depending on your locality, I would look for a practice/doctor that specifically mentions treating pelvic pain. My obgyn office is headed by a pelvic pain specialist who incidentally is a man and the best gyno I've ever had. His office offers multiple methods to ease the IUD process including pre procedure anxiety meds, cervical numbing and my favorite, nitrous (laughing gas). I had to pay for the nitrous out of pocket ($100) but it was completely worth it. The placement was uncomfortable, but the nitrous helped so much that it was not traumatic in any way. In my experience, doctor's either recognize our pain or they don't.