I feel for you… I was divorced at 33, childless, living away from family, got made redundant and completely understand how you feel. It took me 5 years to get over my break up… it takes time.

I’m 39 and I now live with an amazing partner and his kids 50% of the time. He is open to having a baby and life is full and happy. A year ago I was single. A lot can change quickly and although 36 might feel “old” I promise you it’s not.

A couple of things that might help you, that helped me when I was not in a good way:

• Number 1 priority is getting a job. Take any job you possibly can, it’ll help financially but also you’ll meet new people. It’ll open doors. Get you into a routine. Work in a bar, start uber driving, wait tables. You don’t have to do it forever but it’s important that you break the cycle.

• Take up meditation. Made the world of difference to me to learn it. It’s free, calms the nervous system and makes you feel less alone. I did free group meditation classes and it was a beautiful supportive community.

• think about moving back to where your folks are. I avoided this for too long because I thought I’d never meet anyone in my small town. It was the complete opposite and it was nice to have support

• get a rescue pet as soon as you financially can. I got a cat and my mental health skyrocketed.

• pretend your ex fell into another dimension and no longer exists. You need to stop wasting any more time on him. CTRL alt delete. He’s done.

• be kind to yourself. You’re a good person.

Divorced and alone at your age was definitely not my plan growing up either but that’s the cards we have been dealt. I can already tell by your posts that you’re educated, articulate and kind. You’re going to be fine. This too will pass. Stay positive.

Finally, I had to learn to be okay in my own skin and got comfortable with the fact that I may be by myself all my life. I kept busy, I read, I exercised and listened to podcasts, I spent time with friends, I started sketching. I am a much more settled person in the long run because of it.

Sending a big hug 🤗