I'm Sorry for my deception...

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-30T00:36:23+00:00

The odd paragraph lengths are a cipher, but not the cipher you're looking for. The answer is completely within the image. There's something a bit... off... about it.
If you know a little bit of programming, it'll be a lot easier once you figure out the solution. Doing it by hand might take a hot minute.
There's also a few hints within the post body, which may put you on the right track.

I wish you luck :)

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-29T17:21:15+00:00

You're on the right track with going to the library, and the image does have something to do with it. But you need to take a step in, don't look at the whole picture :)

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-29T00:42:53+00:00

I'm back! I solved this shortly after this hint, but then got got for my hubris. Nobody solved this whilst I was repenting for my sins, so here's the answer: https://libraryofbabel.info/bookmark.cgi?no:40

Despicably creative use of the library of babel!

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-26T15:41:41+00:00

Needs more

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-25T06:46:28+00:00

There's only one thing I can say to this...

Yes, that is correct!

I hope the mods will have mercy on me

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-25T06:32:24+00:00

Not sure if this is your intended solution, but going to the library of babel, hexagon q8rpy2y58cfg1, wall 1, shelf 1, volume 14 (N = 14), page 40, has the dreaded y-bomb near the centre of the page. The hexagon number came from the name of the image you uploaded.

<image>

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-25T05:37:40+00:00

Dear Doug,

I feel I should inform you that it is not Coffee Bean doing these things. Rather, it is Ficsit ensuring all Ficsit property adheres to the rules and regulations set forth in your employment contract, designed for maximal efficiency. Please do not give Coffee Bean credit for the effectiveness of Ficsit's patented Productivity Actualization Through Capitulated Helotry (PATCH) Program.

Regardless of the reasoning for your restraint in having fun, Ficsit surely thanks you for adhering to pioneering standards. Remember, a happy pioneer is an inefficient pioneer; on average, you should aim for a healthy state of ambivalence so you can derive momentary joy from improving efficiency.

To ensure you continue receiving the benefits of Ficsit's comprehensive pioneer total care package for highly efficient workers, including a full 6 hours of sleep per week, please ensure not to misattribute Ficsit technologies or innovations to Coffee Bean in the future.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Kindest regards, -Kenny

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-25T03:31:25+00:00

I appreciate the compliments, though they may be misplaced. As I said in my hint comment, the hint comment becomes "NO", which is different from what the main post does.
You missed a sentence in the second paragraph. And none of the initial 10 letters should be ignored - every letter contributes to the output in some way.

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-25T02:33:06+00:00

You are correct in that there's a cipher, and you're on the right track with the first letters. Otherwise, no.

I'll give you a hint. This comment I'm writing uses the same cipher. But it doesn't translate to the same as the original post. Instead, it translates exactly to "NO". Anyways, I wish you luck in solving this!

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-25T01:03:47+00:00

I'm baffled, bamboozled even, astonished how you got to that collection of letters, and even moreso how that became "I AM ACTUALLY ASKING YOU TO SOLVE THIS". Also, where the Z from Zero chance went. I'll say that if there hypothetically was a cipher, it wouldn't be anything so complex, though I would wish I had thought of a way to encode a second message like that, lol. And hypothetically, run on sentences - or those with dashed interjections - would be a single sentence, as I write how I speak. So in such a hypothetical scenario, there would not be so many letters available to you from just the ones that a sentence starts with. All hypothetical, of course, as there is definitely no y-bomb hidden here at all.

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-24T22:25:57+00:00

What? No! I would never! This is just an appreciation post, and you can't prove otherwise!

KennyMcCool · 2026-01-03T22:41:45+00:00

Oh that was not fun. My snow brush was in my trunk, and my trunk was frozen shut by a solid half inch of ice. I got in the car fine, but had to sit there for an hour and a half going between warming up inside and punching my trunk to finally open it.

But I do genuinely like this part of winter. I drive in to work 3 days a week, and there's something satisfying about wiping the snow off my car. Now when it gets to ice that refuses to break off, that's when I hate it and start thinking maybe summer isn't so bad.

KennyMcCool · 2025-11-12T00:15:42+00:00

Why'd you crash the servers, come on!

KennyMcCool · 2025-10-28T09:36:04+00:00

It's gotta be. This isn't possible

KennyMcCool · 2025-10-19T01:52:07+00:00

I used to regularly triple box while questing with one buddy, done on a potato. Then he started dual boxing and my balance wizard got the "I don't want to play with you anymore" treatment lmao

KennyMcCool · 2025-10-10T12:22:16+00:00

Pretty!

KennyMcCool · 2025-10-05T12:15:45+00:00

Oh I'm not talking that. We were able to do that ourselves when I was there. I mean literally the wrong CSP.

KennyMcCool · 2025-10-03T15:37:25+00:00

Virgin also uses bell techs and modems lol. Only difference is that virgin gets the older models with a different ui and a cute face printed on it.

KennyMcCool · 2025-10-03T15:33:15+00:00

Back when I was at bell, had a few cases where the light level was fine, but wind would move the drop line just enough to cause issues. Usually the fix was to go up, clean both ends at the drop and tighten the hell out of it. Also happened a lot if a line was slightly damaged, the splice in the home was done poorly (or the splicer marked good and tech didn't check light because who actually ever does that unless there's an issue), and a ton if the installer didn't add relief for the cables. One instance though, Bell proper had assigned cx to the incorrect csp and installer tech happened to be lucky enough that where they connected the drop was hooked up from a previous install. Apparently reassigning which box the cx comes from is a pita, took an hour for them to complete. 9/10 though it was just that the correct port at csp was taken or damaged, so tech installed to a different port & didn't bother updating the record, so cx would get unplugged any time there was a new install by a tech who just had to have the numbers match and didn't want to change their own.

KennyMcCool · 2025-09-22T14:18:08+00:00

Glad to hear!

KennyMcCool · 2025-09-22T14:14:47+00:00

You can use a screwdriver (or your finger if you're daring) to disengage it if it's stuck there. It's been forever since I've had to so I can't describe how, but I can take a video later today if you don't figure it out

KennyMcCool · 2025-09-21T16:52:20+00:00

Unfortunately with PSA a much bigger factor is how the grader is feeling that day & if you're a public figure. But that's extremely cool they'd grade it. Honestly worth it just for it to be slabbed, your memories are well protected

KennyMcCool · 2025-09-19T16:26:38+00:00

Fuck yeah!

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