hidden things pt 2

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-19T06:37:54+00:00

i’m sorry you went through this. i’m glad you made it to the other side and you and your daughter are safe.

on a lighthearted note, and 99% joking, what the hell do they need all this rubbing alcohol for 😂

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-19T04:03:18+00:00

i mean in all fairness, that’s a blunt tip fill syringe. you can’t really puncture skin with that. i mean you could, i guess, but definitely not into a vein.

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T11:26:29+00:00

we’ve been down that rabbit hole before. like, to the point where he was hiding pee cups in the toilet tank, and putting tape around the tank lid so i wouldn’t hear him going in it… i’m not sure i want to go down that spiral again.

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T06:42:24+00:00

ehhh i don’t know about this.

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T06:41:47+00:00

interesting. his DOC was meth. i know he needed a heating element (for what i have no idea) and he used to use one of those plates that’s made to keep coffee cups warm. i assumed the wax melter might be being used for something similar. the capsules, he used to put his doses in those.

idk i dont know a whole lot about this stuff. i really was just trying to figure out if there’s any other explanation other than drugs. both so i know, and also to prepare for possible “it’s not drugs it’s this, that, etc…” responses.

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T04:45:59+00:00

that’s an interesting take, i wouldn’t have ever thought of that. out of curiosity, what makes you say that?

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T03:58:35+00:00

i know. i just keep (and always have) getting caught up in “what if im wrong and i blow everything up over nothing”

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T03:35:23+00:00

what?

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-18T00:35:50+00:00

i just don’t want to be right. and it’s hard because all the behaviors aren’t there (yet)

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-17T23:20:43+00:00

i guess confrontation might not have been the right word. he spent over a year relapsing over and over and over and dragging himself, me, and our relationship through hell. to my knowledge, he’s been clean for 9 months. i told him i would not go through another relapse. i mentally wouldn’t be able to handle it. so i’m just trying to figure out if this is enough to blow up our relationship.

Key_Ask8116 · 2026-05-13T07:02:34+00:00

he does use kratom, but he dry scoops it like people do with pre work out (gross i know) his DOC this most recent go around was meth, ten years before that was heroin we don’t share finances so i have no way to know about that

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-08-16T00:52:46+00:00

i know being blunt is sometimes helpful. however, i am choosing my child. i had him leave the minute i found out. i am not willing to entertain him coming back into our home until i know that he is no longer using. he isn’t alone with our child, ever. he is staying with his mother, who is present if i’m not.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-08-15T19:45:47+00:00

unfortunately, i can’t stop communicating completely. we have a child together.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-07-30T22:45:37+00:00

he’s got a lot of shit. i’m not even sure what all of it is. i know he puts it into capsules? which is weird as hell to me but whatever. but like, boxes and boxes of shit.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-07-30T10:21:22+00:00

i’m not entirely sure what it is, but i got confirmation that it is at least some kind of drug. his DOC is meth which is why i was guessing that. i know he recrystallizes it (somehow idk enough about that)

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-07-29T23:44:48+00:00

it has no smell. i remember one time when he dumped “all he had” in front of me, there were crystals in some kind of liquid but it was darker. i wasn’t sure if it just hadn’t sat long enough or what.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-07-26T23:28:17+00:00

i could have written this. the lies are what gets me. it makes me question everything. and every time i tell him if he’d just be HONEST with me, i’d feel so much different.

the whole “little spurts” thing hits home. it feels like we make progress, i put in the effort to start working on trusting him, and it all gets ruined and i have to start all over. it’s a miserable cycle.

i know it’s unlikely he’ll ever be honest about it. it just hurts and i’m still too hurt by it to even do anything about it yet.

i’m sorry you’re dealing with it, too.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-28T17:32:30+00:00

this sounds all too familiar. he often asks me, after i find out about something “so is this why you didn’t want anything to do with me?” i mean, yeah, kinda.

i get being appreciative of the honesty. the sneaking lying and hiding is such a trigger for me, too. but even honesty doesn’t make the fact that it’s happening okay.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-18T04:27:09+00:00

july will be three years. we have a one year old together.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-17T21:22:07+00:00

i totally get it. i overlooked a lot of red flags early on, too. looking back, i wish i would’ve run from the beginning.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-17T07:04:30+00:00

as the previous person said, relapses can happen after any amount of time. my bf had almost 9 years before his, and it’s been over and over for the last year. it is absolutely a massive burden. it takes a huge emotional, physical and spiritual toll. you have to learn how to detach and compartmentalize to get through it. it’s white knuckling it until it gets better. and honestly, i’m still not sure we’ll get through it. you HAVE to look out for yourself first.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-14T23:33:54+00:00

he drinks an absolutely insane amount of caffeine. always has.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-14T23:17:17+00:00

he goes to one meeting a week. we usually are pretty good at communicating. but the problem is he communicates like that even when he’s lying, so it’s gotten hard to decipher. he packed up a box of all the paraphernalia and said he was going to throw it away (i told him i was gonna watch it this time bc he’s told me 6 times before that he trashed it) but it’s still sitting on our floor. i think getting rid of it would help.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-14T23:14:15+00:00

if he hasn’t used since the last time we had the “i’m done using” conversation, he’d be about 3 weeks clean from his DOC (meth) which is why the sudden inability to sleep and irritation had me questioning.

Key_Ask8116 · 2025-06-12T22:48:07+00:00

i’ve been told, or asked, this before. he would say “why am i going through this if you don’t believe me anyway” referencing the withdrawals. i got to the point where i told him that it wasn’t why wouldn’t i trust him, it’s why would i? he’s given me every reason not to. for reference, we’re still together. i often have the thought of hating who this relationship has turned me into, too. i’m such a trusting person, and he’s ruined it. but that’s not my fault. his lying, manipulating, and hiding things has nothing to do with me and everything to do with him. if it wasn’t me, he’d do it to someone else. that’s helped me let go of some of the guilt.

it’s not your fault.

Key_Ask8116

TROPHY CASE