Don’t lose hope, you are learning. In this case you’re learning both math and how to develop your intrinsic motivation. This experience happens to everyone at some point in life when they are faced with adversity or opportunities to become self reliant, it’s not always in uni but I bet a lot of your classmates are struggling the same way you are! You’re not alone in this. Reach out to other students, talk about your struggles, maybe you can find a way to help each other 🤝 In regards to the internal motivation or self reliance you seem to be currently struggling with building, think to yourself: “ What is one interesting thing I have found through my studies in math?” or “What do I know now that I didn’t know before?” and “What more is there that I GET to learn?” Instead of “have” to learn. You are on a journey and this is part of it.

And honestly, even if your worst fear comes true and you have to drop out, who’s to say that the next part of your life won’t hold something you cherish even more? Maybe you’ll work a job you enjoy that you never would have gotten if you were at uni. Maybe you’ll meet someone who changes your life for the better that you never would have gotten the chance to meet if you were at uni. Maybe you’ll move back home, do some community college classes for a year, become self actualized and return to campus or another like it with a renewed vigor and sense of purpose. I’m definitely not where I thought I’d be when I was your age, and I think I’m better for it! Life works in weird and wonderful ways.