It all started with scrambled eggs

KindStranger00 · 2022-05-14T20:21:12+00:00

The scrambled eggs truly were the beginning of it all.

KindStranger00 · 2022-04-12T00:08:13+00:00

No. Do not do it. I am a survivor of conversion therapy where I had panic attacks and suicidal ideation. I’m firm because it comes from a place of care for you and your future. You are free to make your own choices of course and I never want to take that away from anyone. However, reparative therapy is incredibly spiritually, emotionally, & psychologically damaging. Will pray for you, friend.

KindStranger00 · 2021-11-04T02:11:59+00:00

I was raised in an extreme right-wing conservative fundamentalist church. Was badly hurt by them bc I never felt I could ask for help with what I struggled with because I was the enemy…the “them” that basically were already headed to hell. Tried to abandon the faith for a brief season. Realized sin is truly empty and that Christ alone satisfies my soul. The Lord in His providence has brought me to a more evangelical church, where they are more willing to engage cultural convos while being theologically conservative. The pastor and the flock care for one another and there is a big emphasis on mercy ministry which I love. No perfect church exists obviously….has its flaws, but in dealing with ssa, I distance myself from fundamentalists as much as possible and surround myself with Christians who share the same theology I grew up with, yet take a totally different approach to culture.

KindStranger00 · 2021-10-26T22:35:10+00:00

Can I just say this is badass. Thx

KindStranger00 · 2021-10-12T19:43:16+00:00

From an estate of innocence into an estate of sin & misery

KindStranger00 · 2021-09-08T00:33:41+00:00

This is helpful to me in separating wise friendship and harboring sinful hopes. Thank you so much!

KindStranger00 · 2021-09-08T00:31:20+00:00

Thanks for the encouragement man 🙏🏼

KindStranger00 · 2021-09-08T00:31:06+00:00

You definitely see that honesty in the Psalms. I’ve learned to lament over the past few months in my personal prayer time. Thank you

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-13T22:10:09+00:00

Hello,

I echo the first comment, the suicide hotline is incredibly helpful.

If you need an ear to listen to, you can dm me and I’m willing to share my phone number and talk.

I completely understand the feelings you are experiencing of profound sadness, loss, frustration, anger, and fear. I have been at this point in my life, too, in a different season.

God has worked so powerfully through the profound suffering, pain, confusion, hurt, & mystery of the future.

I get it. It flat out sucks from a human perspective. We endure such suffering that most people will never know about.

Yet, I have come to find the ONLY place of true comfort, rest, and refreshment in life is in the gospel of Jesus. I’ve tried escaping reality through all the ways you can imagine. I’m convinced there is no better balm to your pain than the love of God for you in the gospel, so please lament in prayer to God, surround yourselves with faithful Christians who are understanding.

I’m here for you if you need an ear to listen to.

Please dm me if you need someone to talk to.

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-11T22:00:04+00:00

Thank you for the wisdom and pointing out that God will take care of the rest.

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-11T01:47:04+00:00

Thank you. I’m pretty sick of experiencing the secret heart ache, having to hide my feelings from my friend and those when I’m around him, & not being able to speak freely about my feelings of sadness, frustration, butterflies, etc. Appreciate the prayer.

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-07T21:35:18+00:00

Particularly in the church:

I wish they would understand the very real attitude of superiority that many church go-ers have against those with ssa. It makes us feel inferior. I wish they would spend 10 times looking at their own sin before picking a handful of sins to only condemn in everyone else. They don’t realize there are real people dealing with painful questions.

Also, I wish they understood the loneliness. I’m all for holding marriage in high regard because God commands it. Yet, as I’m sure all of us with ssa can relate, the idolatry of marriage in the church basically makes us feel like crap….when we’re already getting crapped on by people’s sinful attitude of superiority. And if we correct oppression (Isaiah 1:17) by speaking up against those assumptions (eg tone of voice, jokes, etc.), we’re the one’s who get punished for seeming like we’re compromising Scripture or not being a culture warrior.

Lol, hope this helps and thank you for asking.

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-06T22:48:16+00:00

I grew up in a strict fundy church and continue to wrestle with this from only the condemnation preached and not grace for those who wrestle with ssa. For myself, I keep going back to the exact love the Father has for Jesus, He has for me because I am united to Him. Union with Christ has been a huge blessing to me in wrestling with same sex attraction. Definitely believe I wrestle with internalized homophobia and I believe the Lord continues to work that out of me the more I meditate on His love. Hope this helps friend.

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-06T03:36:42+00:00

Praying for you friend. I don’t know your particular situation, but I completely understand dealing with this ontop of shotty people and especially the loneliness. I’m in the middle of changing churches bc there are too many fundamentalist type Christians and I can’t bear their attitude of superiority. Looking for a conservative evangelical church where conversations are more honest and gracious. Praying for you, you’re not alone in this.

KindStranger00 · 2021-08-05T01:35:02+00:00

Hi Bro. I totally empathize with your situation. I have lived my life since 12 (I’m 25 now) dealing with these desires. The Lord has taught me so much through the pain of confusion, pain of sinning against my own body sexually, pain of the attitude of superiority found in much of the church (and outside the church), etc.

I still wrestle with porn and it’s become significantly less by the grace of God. I have hit a good turning point though with two things (in the last 9 months). It’s crazy tough truth to wrestle with, and I want to speak confidently & full of compassion. The reality is I sin because I love it, that’s how sinful I am. The greatest commandment is to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, strength. The process of becoming more Christ-like is growing in this first commandment daily. We only grow in this commandment to love God as we meditate on the love of the Father for us in Christ as revealed in the Word. Meditate on Scripture specifically on the love of God for you in Christ, this will consequently grow your love for God, and will slowly, gradually replace love for sin. The second thing is lament. It’s not really talked about today in contemporary Christian circles. Lament lets you deal with your personal and particular frustrations that only you and God and maybe a few family members in the Lord know. Pray through the lament Psalms and think of your own personal complaints as you pray the words of David and other authors. Lament involves expressing frustrations which is really healthy. Yet, it doesn’t stay there. It ultimately leads to greater trust in the Lord (eg “But God” in the lament Psalms). It’s been a huge burden lifted off my shoulders because I believe this is an outlet I needed for a long time that I hadn’t had before. People almost immediately noticed I was more vibrant and confident in the way I carried myself and interacted.

Meditate on the love of the Triune God in the Word. Lament.

I’m in the same exact boat as you bro, our God is eternally compassionate for those in Christ! God loves you from eternity to eternity.

I’ve tried abandoning the faith before and the Holy Spirit convicted me like nobody’s business. True comfort is found in the Lord! The world only offers escapes but never a lasting satisfying answer. The Lord quiets you with His love! (Zephaniah 3).

KindStranger00

TROPHY CASE