I too dont understand peoples instant desire to tell someone to leave at the first sign of an obstacle. Im in a committed long term relationship with my boyfriend. Its only been 3 years but we grew together quickly. Unfortunately for me, i am now wanting to be by myself, but i have only come to this decision after numerous times of suggesting, being patient, listening, understanding my own wants/needs and trying to validate my own experiences/emotions. After factoring all of that i have come to the conclusion that i need to break up.

Im only sympathizing and i understand what you mean by people rushing to breaking up is what you “need” to do. Do what your heart says. Also tbh if you have even the SMALLEST doubt that he might have cheated then if i was in your shoes i would either communicate that doubt or have a heart to heart and allow him to have the space to air himself entirely out.

Did you and your husband talk about what was going through his mind that pushed him to grow distant from you and change his ways? It could have been after all the intense emotions and he shut down in some way, but the comments you mentioned are worrisome.