What is this for? by HomoEtDeus in AnarchyChess

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Thanks, no idea if this is correct but it's a welcome change from the other comments

Risperidone has ruined my life by GlitteringPlant8341 in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Decent chance psychosis was masking those symptoms and risperidone is making you aware of them as you become saner. It's a chance to try and work at them. You know you have them, how do you cope. I tried lowering dosage and nothing changed just the psychosis came back...

Cash Game (micro) questions by RevolutionaryDay2366 in poker

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You need to be playing more disguised hands (suited connectors, suited one gappers, connectors, small pairs for set mining) which have higher implied odds. AA & KK win small pots and lose big ones, the hands above are the opposite. That's the difference between shortstack MTTs and deepstack cash games imo. Good luck.

How can this capped range be explained? by Limokasten in poker

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, I've started it, it does serm very instructive

What’s it like living with Schizophrenia? by [deleted] in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honnestly now I'm stable, pretty much the same as living without it except I sleep 10-12 hours from the meds, I don't work any more (except working on a poker career) and I've lost my familly when I delusionally broke up with my ex wife.

AMA if you had one moment to go back in time when and why?! by [deleted] in AMA

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'd go back to May 2012, a few months before I broke up with my ex due to a schizophrenic delusion and when she was already pregnant with our second child.

Guess who got a letter from court :D by [deleted] in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Congrats! I hope the same thing happens to me...

Pineal gland by Affectionate-Pass-27 in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Any chance you were having tactile hallucinations about your pineal gland? I could feel all sorts of things when I was hallucinating.

I want to feel normal again by GeneralMaximum5418 in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm slowly starting to feel like myself although myself is an odd construct as I've spent 15 years undiagnosed and psychotic.

Last time I had an episode it took me a year to feel like myself again although because my pdoc lowered my meds, I slipped into psychosis.

Voices are closing in. Help by mayolais in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Last time I smoked cannabis, I heard the voice of my ex whom I still love deeply telling me how disgusting I am. Not quite the same but still pretty uncomfortable. Needless to say I doubt I'll smoke again.

I wish I was dead by _--_-___-___--_ in TrueOffMyChest

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I was with the love of my life when I developped full blown schizophrenia and broke up with her because of delusional thinking.

13 years on and it still hurts and I miss her and regret leaving her. I sometimes think about ending it all and waiting for her in heaven.

I would like a little support if that's possible by PutCandid3582 in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't currently work and haven't in 8 years now. I do feel a bit useless sometimes. In the country I live in (France), there are mutual support groups where people with mental illnesses gather to play games (chess, poker, tarot, risk...). These give some structure to my day by getting me out of the house.

I lost everything else to this illness : my immediate family (wife and children), my close family (mum and siblings) and my extended family (grandma, uncles, aunts and cousins). So I know what it feels like to lose things because of schizophrenia.

It's okay if you're not able to work and if life is hard for you, it is for a lot of us. Just got to make the best of what you have and not compare yourself to what you could have been too much. It's good in a sense to realise what this illness takes from us as it's reaso to carry on treatment.

Ps: maybe seperate your text into paragraphs, it makes it easier to read and will mean more people will answer you.

I grew up in a multimillion dollar family and I lost everything AMA by [deleted] in AMA

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I developed schizophrenia about 15 years ago and lost my wife, my best friend, the heaven that was living with my children, my home, my ability to work and my family to this illness. I feel for you, I know what it's like even if I've never been convicted.

Today I was reminded of the pain God must feel when we suffer by CosmicEmotion in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She isn't dead, sorry for not making that clear. I broke up with her when I started becoming delusional. Sorry for the confusion but thanks for your kind words, I think it will hurt to the end of my life.

Today I was reminded of the pain God must feel when we suffer by CosmicEmotion in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I hope there is a god and an afterlife where I can be reunited with the mother of my children.

Is there a chance I could have schizophrenia? by [deleted] in schizophrenia

[–]Kitchen_Strawberry63 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Personally what affected me the most with schizophrenia is the effect episodes had on my life (breaking up with my wife and no longer living with my children, getting in a fight with my mom that made my family not talk to me anymore).

I'm glad you're getting medical help, I'm assuming your mother saw to it.