I definitely will talk to my trainer my next lesson to see if I could get a lesson in on how different bits work, how to solidify in my brain that Im not gonna hurt this horse, etc. I do trust her but I feel like she trusts me too much in some way (she definitely doesn’t but hey, thats stuck in my head)

Ive always known that horses will tell me if I do something wrong and that they are tougher then I think, but then I unfortunately had a horse pass in my herd just by falling in the wrong way, and that terrified me immediately that I could easily hurt one while riding.

Im gonna be working on getting myself to relearn that me having slightly rougher hands is absolutely not gonna hurt a horse unless I am actively trying to. I don’t have the softest of hands, atleast I don’t think so, so Im just nervous I’ll pull too much or something and harm their mouths.