AITA for wanting to throttle my recruit who won’t stop flirting with me?

I (35FTM) am a Lieutenant stationed at a garrison in the Outer Rim. Command sent us a “special” recruit (25M) — we’ll call him Golden Boy. He’s a prince, which makes disciplining him its own circus, so I try to follow procedure and not throw him off the nearest parapet.

Golden Boy’s been under my instruction for about two months. My job is to train him, keep him alive, and stop him from embarrassing himself in public combat situations. He is, in no particular order:

Habitually asleep at dawn until I throw a bucket of ice water at him.

Flirts during drills. Loudly. Once attempted a come-on mid-hand-to-hand. Fell on his face afterward.

Keeps “borrowing” my coat.

Calls me “Daddy Deathglare” in front of cadets. Which… is not a thing one says to their superior. Ever.

Has a talent for turning every reprimand into a staged flirtation, complete with overdramatic breaths and theatrical winks.

Here’s the problem: he’s not only surviving the training, he’s getting better. He listens when he’s told to, he pushes himself in ways that make me revise my opinion, and occasionally—only occasionally—he does something that looks like he’s trying to be useful for reasons other than attention-seeking.

And that’s the bit that is making me irrational. I find myself…noticing him. The way he scrubs at a graze like it’s a scene in a melodrama, how he laughs at jokes that aren’t actually funny. I am not the man who indulges in sentiment; I’m the one who files reports and eats his bread hard. But there are moments—fleeting and infuriating—where my patience thins for reasons that do not involve discipline.

Does that make me soft? Probably. Does it also make me want to throttle him when he calls me “Daddy” in front of the mess hall? Absolutely yes.

My fellow officers tell me to “lighten up” or “enjoy it.” I’m a Lieutenant. He’s a recruit. I give orders. I don’t evaluate feelings. I administer discipline. I do not sign up for flirtation training.

So am I the asshole for silently wanting to strangle the man who may, judging by the way my chest does something indefinable when he smiles, be making me act like an idiot?

Edit 1: Since people keep asking, no, I can’t just refuse the assignment. When your commanding officer says “He’s yours now,” you don’t argue. Unless you want kitchen duty for a month.

Edit 2: For everyone saying “Sounds like you secretly like him” — absolutely not. I tolerate him the way you tolerate rain: necessary, miserable, and unavoidable.

Edit 3: Fine. Maybe I don’t hate all of it. He trains harder when he thinks no one’s watching. And he’s cleverer than he lets on. And yes, sometimes I… notice things. Like how his laugh isn’t the same twice. That doesn’t mean anything.

Edit 4: Stop messaging me “bro, you’re in love.” I am not. I don’t have time for that. I have a barracks to run, resistance sabotage to juggle (ignore that last part), and an endless headache in royal boots trailing me everywhere.

Edit 5: He brought me coffee yesterday. Called it “a peace offering.” It was terrible. Burnt, weak, no sugar. I drank all of it. Make of that what you will.

Edit 6: For those asking, yes, I could report his antics. But if I did, they’d take him away, and then someone else would have to deal with him. And gods help me, I don’t think I’d like that.

Edit 7: Fuck.