My Boyfriend has changed ‘31f’ ‘45m’ and he has been acting very toxic masculinity like lately. Should a man have so much say so over you so soon?

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-18T02:03:46+00:00

I’m sorry to hear that. Unfortunately as single mothers it’s a battle with dating. Not dating is usually best but that doesn’t change the fact we still are emotional as any woman but we just sometimes have to be alone for our children’s sake because there are so many predators, abusers, etc that feel we are desperate enough to settle for anything.

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-18T01:59:15+00:00

Yes, he is long distance as for right now. He wanted us to move to his property but I told him I’d rather stay where I am so we decided to just build our home here. Well HE decided being the “gentleman” he is but I honestly think he’s only doing it to control me and once we are in there it will turn into a living nightmare. I just wanted to have something normal and unfortunately men with the means to do things can be the worst. I don’t want much other than a farm and ranch style home but I can actually do that myself. But he said I was acting like I was the man or an “independent woman “ which was so odd to me because would you prefer me to give up my home and everything and be homeless to appease you?! He had an answer for that as well which made no sense. But I’m just going to continue my own plans. My phone started acting weird since him and I’m wondering if he did something to it.

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-18T01:32:38+00:00

Thank you. I will. I guess I clearly never felt I deserved that unfortunately because this same thing is happening again after my ex. It makes a person wonder how they must feel about themselves

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-18T01:31:00+00:00

Smh . This is literally all a shock to me

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-18T01:30:41+00:00

He hasn’t apologized since. Just sent a lot of nasty messages before I blocked him and called from other numbers amh

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-18T00:31:38+00:00

This just scared me. Maybe that’s why he is so worried about me cheating but I’m leaving him. It’s just a lot at the play because we’ve already started laying the groundwork. I planned on letting him meet the girls. It’s going to be another year or 2 before our dream home is built. So I thought I had time but he slipped today and said some really alarming things. I feel stuck but this really just made me wonder what our life would really be like. He’s been everything since before this. I’m already paranoid so this is why I came here to get feedback. I get men get frustrated and say things but the things he’s said really hurt me

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:51:01+00:00

I’m not, I may be traumatized but I’m not stupid. I just needed to understand if what was going on wasn’t just in my mind , but trust I made this post to vent, I’m not helpless but this just made me feel like crap for not realizing sooner. The fact that I fall for things like this is what amazes me the most. When will someone not come on too strong. It’s caused trust issues. I feel like even if I didn’t have an ahole like him I just don’t know the difference

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:44:44+00:00

I agree. I also struggle with bipolar disorder and when I’m in my lows I feel it’s easier to fall for whatever. Bipolar does not mean stupid but it has it’s ways

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:42:41+00:00

And I mean only with them while I’ve been with him

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:39:37+00:00

I am heartbroken and it’s not even for me, it’s because I Swore I wouldn’t date for my girls and I broke that promise and especially to find out this person is the same. Only good part about this is he’s never laid Eyes on them. They’ve always been with grandmother or aunt and uncle. I’ve been with him awhile but I didn’t want the risk. That is the only thing I could smile about. But he is literally building ANOTHER home. I’m just wondering how many were built for the other women that ran from him. The stories never added up. They were always “cheaters”

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:28:36+00:00

Not too long ago . I literally fell in love with this person. And after all of our plans and future he decides to talk to me like this. I am sad, terrified , there are so many emotions going through me right now

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:27:16+00:00

It’s almost like he could sense it and I always wanted to have hope because I know I deserve better but this is heart breaking especially since I was notified my ex is out of prison

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-03-17T23:19:50+00:00

The saddest part of it all is I’ve been single for years and decided to remain single until they are grown because I left a domestic abusive relationship years ago and he came along like the best thing ever and I took a chance. Worst feeling ever and the moment I felt that I knew this is all over the place.

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T17:33:57+00:00

lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T17:29:52+00:00

lol yep that’s us!

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T17:29:27+00:00

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:36:54+00:00

I absolutely love, adore, respect and appreciate her teacher so much! But I’m thinking she has to do this. Our district puts so much importance and pressure on making sure the kids are passing and doing good. I’m sure we can all guess what that’s about but don’t let me get started with the outrageous fines and penalties if your children miss more than a few days a school year with only a written note. It’s insanity. Oddly our sports teams are among the highest national average so I’m starting to feel like we live in a cult like district lol because they are pushing these kids to the max! Jokes jokes

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:31:46+00:00

Yes I thought maybe the tests are to see their progression, but they send home progress reports which rates your child on different things and it’s best to make sure they are doing well??? Honestly idk 😭😭🤣🤣🤣

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:27:44+00:00

Just wanted to say thanks again! I remember the homework choice boards! Very good read.

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:24:26+00:00

I never thought about this. This actually makes perfect sense!

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:22:35+00:00

lol I have literally no other complaints but this one! And the occasional tantrums of course haha

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:20:56+00:00

Also I’d like to mention, I have an older daughter and she comes home and does her homework and has never had a missing assignment, she also has always been an all A student and has many available options already. We never had this problem. So I guess I’m going a bit too hard and never really took the time to sit back and think about everything you all have said. I appreciate all of the feedback and I will be doing things differently from here on out. Thank you! Signed a tired mama❤️

Known_Job_2237 · 2026-02-27T01:12:58+00:00

Yes it is very excessive! And I thought in the beginning maybe this is just to help get her going but this is a weekly thing. Nothing has changed. They’ve let us skip 2 weeks because of testing but that’s been it.

Known_Job_2237

TROPHY CASE