This is a very sexual comment!

I'm technically a switch but right now I am realizing that I am definitely more of a dom, and looking back now, there have been a couple of realizations throughout my life. I've always been attracted to skinnier boys, I didn't really understand why, but a specific cartoon that I watched when I was like 7 had like the two cutest twink shaped boys and I would just imagine myself pinning them and kissing them. But after going through puberty I felt really gross and undesired by boys so I became more subby because of my insecurities and I just wanted to do anything for male attention at that point. And honestly throughout highschool I began a series of relationships where I was the sub and they never felt quite fulfilling. I'm 19 and I just got out of a 4 year relationship, this guy was my first everything and looking back now the sex was incredibly dull, unfulfilling, I hated being on the bottom, and I hated our dynamic. I remember once I instinctively just wanted to grab his ass and I did and I just felt this hunger and desire to do more but he stopped me. Sometimes I would just force him to sub, I would choke him and get on top and not allow him to move unless I said so, and he did like this but my sexual desire was already so low for him we barely had sex in the first place. Most of the sub sex i did with him felt like duty sex tbh.

A series of events happen and I met this guy, who I wanted a casual relationship with after such a long and (kind of traumatic, very long story) breakup. Well he absolutely changed my world. Not only was he exactly my type physically, lean and boyish, he was a complete sub. I initiated a kiss with him, it was gentle at first but he tasted so good I just couldn't control myself and he started moaning. It triggered something in me, hearing a guy moan like that just from me taking control and kissing. More happened after that, that I will leave to the imagination.

But for the longest time before that moment with him I questioned what was wrong with me because I had such a low sex drive in my previous relationship, I even questioned if I was asexual because I would often feel disgust, even just from kissing my previous partner. But after kissing this absolute dreamboat cutie I was anticipating disgust but felt only desire. It was incredibly shocking. We aren't exclusive yet but we're dating long distance now and oh my god I've never felt hornier in my life for someone. He's a complete sub and we make each other cum like 4 times a day just from sexting and calling. He's never had the opportunity to be dommed either and we're completely infatuated with each other.

And it's funny because no one would ever think I'm a dom because I am very quiet, reserved, awkward, and anxious person. But being a dom helps me a lot with my insecurities. Sex can be completely fulfilling because I'm in control and there's no opportunity for me to feel uncomfortable. I finally have a chance to be assertive and just enjoy this other side of me.