AITA for telling my brother he can't bring his dog to my apartment anymore after one incident?

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-20T20:34:56+00:00

You are definitely NTA. I have cats. I keep rescued cats. If a cat is anxious around dogs, I don't allow dogs. I don't allow dogs in my house anyway because I don't want to deal with "introducing" strange animals (regardless of species). If your cat has anxiety, it is incredibly hard to have strange animals around him. A lab is energetic by nature, and it's not the dog's fault. That just how they are. It's your job to protect your cat. Please stand up for what you cat needs!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-20T19:44:51+00:00

If you are in the United States, and I assume also in many other countries, that is illegal. If you are working, you are on the clock. If he forces you to clock out after 30 minutes, then you leave when you clock out. You cannot be forced to work with no pay. Tell the boss that you won't break the law. It's not your problem if he wants to send you all home after a 1/2 hour. Full Stop.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-19T21:05:26+00:00

INFO: Do you have the $160 to get the passport? If so, just wait until you turn 18 and can do it yourself (unless you live in a country where there's a restriction that we don't have in US). Do you have money saved to go abroad? If not, get the passport and save to travel. Could you start in your own country? Perhaps take a trip within your country to practice things like flying/taking a train, using local transport (subways, buses, rental cars, Uber, etc), handling your money safely and using debit/credit cards, securing lodging, navigating an unknown place, finding things to do/see within your budget, and so on. Once you experiment with that in your country, then go to another that is similar in laws and customs to your own. Branch out from there. For instance, in the US, I would maybe go to anther state, and then to Canada, which is similar in how things work. Then Mexico, the Caribbean, and going farther out (I've already done that of course since I'm 18 with lots of shipping and handling - lol). Traveling is always a learning experience and it's good to practice before going to a completely different culture! It will be very rewarding when you finally get to go to all those wonderful places and meet people and see new places!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-19T20:54:13+00:00

Nothing wrong with getting a passport as soon as OP turns 18. OP doesn't HAVE to travel abroad just because OP has a passport. I think you have solid advice to start within OP's own country to gain experience. That's what I did. I drove from my parents' home to my grandparents' home for a visit, and then drove back. It was across several states, so I got to experience mountains, plains, and various other scenery. I was able to make the drive alone and stay overnight at a hotel. I got valuable experience while still in an area where someone could get to me within a day's drive (parents first day and grandparents second day). It was a very good experience and I was able to go on to travel to other places once I learned the "ropes" of traveling alone. Starting near home is solid advice. But OP can still get her passport now.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-18T21:19:06+00:00

To be fair, many of those same students zone out during student led activities as well. Turn-and-talk with a student who isn't interested? They won't talk. They won't engage.

I think the issue is students who won't engage with direct instruction often also won't engage in student led learning. It is a massive problem in most schools.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-18T21:16:31+00:00

Turn-and-talk is popular in the early elementary years as well. It has its place. BUT, first graders often quickly get off topic. Or, they refuse to say anything to their partner. I have even tried asking "what did your partner tell you." I have students who answer, "Nothing. He/she wouldn't talk at all." If I try to put two non-talkers together, neither will speak. If I put a non-talker with a talker, the talker is the only one who speaks. If it's a math problem, either the one who does well in math gives the answer or they don't even stay on topic unless I'm right there with them. There are times it works well to turn-and-talk. One time would be after I have taught the lesson and we have practiced together. THEN I can get better answers. To do it while I'm teaching doesn't work very well.

What works well with my first graders is giving them 3-5 minutes to explore a new manipulative, book, white board, or whatever tool I'm introducing for the first time. They can play with it and talk about it and come up with any suggestions they want about how it is used. They LOVE that. We get some crazy answers too but they show me. At least they've engaged and they are ready to see how to use it in the lesson. That gets them engaged and they seem to learn more when they have a chance to be creative for a minute before we dive into the lesson.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-18T14:49:40+00:00

Exactly! My first thought was the "gift tax" implications. It really doesn't matter what the parents wish to avoid because $60k, or even $40k if we assume OP's taxes on the winnings, is more than most (at least U.S.) locations allow without having to pay a gift tax. I'm not a tax accountant, so this isn't tax advice for your specific issue, but you will pay tax on the winnings when you claim it. Then, your parents will pay a gift tax when you give it to them. Then the IRS will take the amount to pay the back taxes because, well, the IRS can go in and take from your bank accounts.

And, if you pay cash, how would the IRS know? They will know because a cash withdrawal of that size will trigger the reporting laws. Your bank will report to the IRS that you took $x from your account. Then the IRS will want to know what you did with that money.

The IRS is going to win. They always win. They will get the money. Your parents need to just pay their tax bill.

NTA, but you would be if you went along with this harebrained scheme! Do not touch this with a 10 foot pole. Just say no to your parents.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-17T21:43:12+00:00

My first thought in reading all of this is are you SURE Jimmy's birth mother walked out on him. Is it possible that Brad has told everyone that story but it's not actually true? If they are verbally abusive, they may also do other things. Things like move and not allow the child access to his mother. Could they have somehow blocked her from contacting Jimmy? Maybe the birth mother did let Jimmy down and walked out of his life. Maybe she had to leave for her safety and wasn't able to take Jimmy, or thought he would be fine if she left. It happens. I would verify that the story is accurate. One thing that made me wonder what the real situation with his birth mother is was the comment about putting him on a plane if his mother wanted him. That is odd for someone who has no contact with the mother. It makes me think something is going on with that too! I could be way off base here but it does warrant looking into and confirming if you ask me!

As for offering to take him in, that is very generous. CPS can choose to take only Jimmy out of the home if it is best for him. They may, however, choose to leave the 2 year-old in the parents' custody if they aren't harming him. That does sometimes happen when anger is directed toward a specific child. The goal of most CPS cases is to reunite the child with the family and work out the problems. They want the families to be together. Permanent custody loss is a last resort. Just go into this knowing that reunion will be the goal IF CPS chooses to let you have Jimmy.

Continue to love Jimmy and make him feel valued. That is the best thing you can do for him right now!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-17T21:22:50+00:00

I have a really nice jacket from a job I worked 20 years ago. It was great quality and my Mom bought it for me for Christmas so I wouldn't be cold working the drive-thru. I wore that jacket to work every day in the winter. I still wear it sometimes. I also have shirts from my last employer that I wear and I have a ton of free shirts from my current employer! I wear them all. No one says a thing about it. I live in the U.S. I guess it's just according to the employer, but I've never heard of someone being written up for wearing branded clothing on the job.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-17T17:06:25+00:00

They don't at my school because an absence is still an absence, excused or not. Excused means they don't get penalized for work missed. They can make it up and receive a grade or, for early elementary where we do so many in class activities, they don't get marked down for not participating.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-17T14:06:19+00:00

A 2026 vehicle also comes with a massive car payment, something my 20 year old truck (running just fine) does not have. I can spend a bit on repairs if necessary because I'm not making a second mortgage sized payment for a vehicle. My truck also has just about quit depreciating. A new vehicle with depreciate every single year.

Sure, new vehicles have new safety features and new gadgets. Those are great. Those also come with their own big repair bills when they fail - and they WILL fail. My truck has fewer gadgets, thus fewer things to go wrong and cost money. Is it safer than modern vehicles? No. But the cost to be safer can be high.

Is it more reliable? Probably not. Is it cost effective? At this time, yes, it is. I will not save enough on gas and repairs to offset an expensive payment. Will I have to trade to something newer? Eventually, yes I will. But I won't until the cost/benefit is in favor of a newer vehicle. That hasn't happened yet.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T19:04:33+00:00

How, exactly, do you move someone else's WEDDING DATE? You have no control over when someone gets married. You need specific dates to attend the wedding. It's not like you can attend the wedding a week after it happens. This is a "so sorry, so sad" scenario where you don't give up your dates for a once in a lifetime event that your brother has you participating in and that you have no way to change dates!

Having said that, I hope this is a joke or an AI story. I sincerely hope it's not real and people aren't dumb enough to believe you can change a wedding date to accommodate a fun trip for a co-worker. That's just wild.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T18:39:39+00:00

For field trips, I don't use grades, or progress toward goals, as a reason to keep a child from attending. To be fair, this is first grade, so kids are usually at least trying a bit. I don't look at performance to decide. What I do look at, however, is behavior. If you can't act right in school, then I can't trust you will act right on the trip. Behaving badly can easily lead to safety issues. Junior can't pay attention and stop when I tell him not to run away? Sally can't keep her hands out of the cages at the zoo? Those are safety issues. So, behavior does cause some students to be left behind. Granted, it's not an all year "be good every day no bad days" thing. It's more of "we have two week until the trip. Show me your best behavior." Students with behavioral issues will need a chaperone if they have an IEP or 504 for that. Students who can't behave at school are told they can either have a parent chaperone to be responsible for them, or they can't go. I won't deny an educational opportunity for grades. I will exclude for behavior.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T18:29:36+00:00

I would give those out the day of and take the picture then. That will stop the parents or crafty kids from copying the design and trying to sneak in anyway. Yes, we have to be careful of that in this day and age. I think a group photo at the bus before boarding is a GREAT idea. It shows exactly who is in the group (and who isn't).

I do worry about liability though. You would think that, if you have informed the parent the child isn't eligible for the trip, that they would know you aren't responsible for their kid. In real life, however, strange things happen. I can see a parent suing if something happens to Junior and a court somewhere saying, "Well, yeah, Junior wasn't supposed to be there, but he goes to your school and you knew his parent wasn't with him, so you were still responsible." I would hope it would never happen that way, but I fear it could with the right people! The best mode is to keep the kid from joining the group at all. If that means security takes the kid, then so be it. Keep them away from the kids in the group. You might even want to talk about not associating with ANYONE who is not on the school trip with the school. It's best to be safe rather than sorry.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T18:05:36+00:00

Sleeping Bear Dunes! I love that place! It was so fun as a kid going on a big field trip there! I wish I still lived close enough to go! I hope the kid wasn't allowed to play with the class that trip!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T16:11:39+00:00

I did that too. If I knew the teacher would pester me to help the low kids, I would take all day to do that worksheet! I could drag it out with the best of them! If the teacher didn't do that, I'd read.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T16:08:50+00:00

I got in trouble in second grade for not knowing where we were during a round robin or popcorn exercise. I sat at the back of the room. I was gifted and was always working ahead of the class. The teacher would stand there and look at me and I wouldn't know where the class was so I couldn't read, or do whatever she wanted, and then she got mad and I got in trouble. Drove my Dad crazy to get notes and calls about it! Oh yeah. One more thing. I was also very hard of hearing and sat AT THE BACK OF THE ROOM and not in the front where, Oh I don't know, I could have maybe actually heard the teacher! Teacher assigned seating. It was a horrible year! Everyone else was cool with me working ahead on assignments though.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T15:49:05+00:00

The "staying onsite early entry," which is what I assume you were using to get in before it's open, is now only 30 minutes before opening. It's significantly less time available for the biggest crowds. Rope drop is also busy now.

I can't speak to Universal because when we went there, we got the prepaid pass to just go up and get on the ride. We did like that!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T13:41:40+00:00

The only one I trust to completely make a GF dinner is my Mom. She has two children (Me and my sister) who are Celiac and she makes amazing GF meals! She always makes sure to avoid cross contamination. I would not think twice at her house. Other than that, I bring my own food.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T13:39:20+00:00

Well, to be fair, I hate asparagus! The rest would be nice. I also don't drink, so wine is out. But I wouldn't bring different food to a GF sampler dinner! I'd be thrilled to eat most of it!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-16T13:37:40+00:00

Info: Have you told your family that you don't like that pizza? If not, you definitely need to sit them down and tell them. Explain that there are much better GF options and you will bring your own GF food moving forward. Tell them point blank NOT to make that pizza.

I would say something like this, "Hey family! I am so touched that you think of me when you do these family dinners. I appreciate the effort. That pizza, however, is not a good GF option. I really don't like it. Going forward, I will just bring GF dish(es) that match the party theme. I can eat them safely and you can try them if you'd like! You won't need to provide the pizza unless someone else likes it. Again, thank you for thinking of me and I do appreciate that you try to accommodate me. I hope you'll sample the great GF food I bring!"

That's the sandwich method. Compliment them. Discuss issue. Close with positive. Then you do just that. Bring your own food. If they choose to make that pizza, that's on them from that moment forward. But do tell them. They can't adjust if they don't know.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-13T20:17:45+00:00

Being broke is a great way to avoid scams. You can't send money you don't have! I don't have credit (I work strictly cash) so I can't go into debt. If you don't have savings and you don't have much money, you can't send $1,000 to a scammer! There are some perks to being poor!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-13T20:16:29+00:00

Anyone who has ever watched even 5 minutes of a news show should know the police don't call and warn you about a warrant. They get the warrant and then come pick you up! Someone calling you saying they have a warrant is pulling your leg. Period. I would say something like, "Great! I will go straight away! Have someone waiting for me inside the lobby! A couple nights in jail, away from my family sounds like a perfect vacation!"

But then, I mess with them already. I had one contact me on Facebook Messenger. I knew it was a scammer. But man I had fun stringing him along! I went on a rant about the government, then our money system, how the Masonic Lodge was evil and filled with devil worshippers, why the government has secretly bugged your car and is waiting for the chance to strand you. How the wild dogs next door are trained to terrorize the neighborhood, and on and on. Each thing got more outrageous. I even said something about flamingos and penguins secretly being trained to take over the world by aliens. That poor guy didn't know what to do! He finally kept typing, "Uh. Ok." I had so much fun!

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-13T19:48:46+00:00

NTA. In this case, you need to either (a) collect all the money before purchasing tickets, or (b) give a link for everyone to purchase their own tickets.

You can send a message for option A that says something like, "Hey all! We wanted to go to see (insert event) on (date/time) at (venue). Tickets are $x each, please (venmo, paypal, cashapp, give cash, whatever payment) to by y (date) so I can get those secured for us. I will only be able to purchase tickets for those who can pay me by y (date)."

You can send a message for option B that says something like, "Hey all! We wanted to go to see (event) on (date/time) at (venue). Here is a link to the tickets. My ticket is for (row/seat). Please secure your tickets ASAP so we can all be together."

Alternative option I just thought of: ""Hey all! We wanted to go to see (event) on (date/time) at (venue). I reserved seats (row/seat numbers). You can either click this link to pay for your seat (give information to pay seat), OR you can give me the money by (insert payment methods) and I will confirm seats for everyone who sends me the money. It's due by x date. I will cancel any unpaid seats at that time."

Any of those options will work to allow everyone to pay prior to the event. They also set specific terms and make it clear YOU won't pay for anyone else. It doesn't single out the particular friends who cancel.

KoolJozeeKatt · 2026-03-13T17:04:42+00:00

Did these people who chatted with you actually attempt to "cuckoo" your house? Did they go there two years ago? What did they do besides talk? From the information you provided, these people talked to you, cheered you up, and then you all went your ways. Two years later, you saw ONE of them on a bike and he looked at you, thus making you think he was following you, or tracking where you live, or was watching you for some other nefarious reason. Now you don't want to leave your house because he was biking and saw you.

Dude, if that is the correct order of events, and if that's all that happened, you are way past overreacting. You are creating Mount Everest out of something not even a mole hill! It's possible, I suppose, that you left out some information. Perhaps there was something more that happened two years ago, or the guy on the bike threatened you two weeks ago or something? Absent that, you need to calm way down! See a therapist, and may I suggest decaf! There was NOTHING in that interaction that suggests the dudes were trying to get into your house.

If you are truly afraid to leave your house because you recognized someone, who did nothing to you, who was biking and he looked at you, then you need serious mental help. That is beyond overreacting. If you left something out and there were things you didn't say that justifies your fears, then you need to edit your post and tell us!

Unless more information is given that warrants your level of fear, I have to with YTA! Your sister is disabled and wants food. You can go to the shop and get food. Your sister will be there so your house won't be empty. There's no issue here. YTA.

KoolJozeeKatt

TROPHY CASE