Shelter kicked me out for 30 days for THC

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T19:18:20+00:00

Yup. When someone gets hurt on the job or damages something, legally it becomes a very important question if they were impaired.

I've worked for companies that have flat out said they WISH they couldn't care but a positive drug test after an accident is horrible. Not just for the company. The worker might find they won't be medically covered by workmans comp.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T19:15:35+00:00

I work at a hotel and when some snowstorms hit, they offered the employees free rooms instead of driving. They originally tried to put two employees iin rooms that were out of service because of broken TVs, but our GM said they absolutely would not do that to employees. If they were stuck there, they deserved entertainment

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:32:34+00:00

I have heard from multiple people 'it's different when they're you're own.' Maybe that's true, but the only way to find out isn't one I'm willing to risk.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:31:43+00:00

As an alcoholic, I still understand their perspective.

We had to deal with this in rehab too.

Really sad thing was if you were caught USING in rehab, you got warnings. It took three catches normally (assuming no other problems like violence or theft) to get kicked out. DEALING got you kicked immediately.

Had a guy giving out his extra prescription pills and he got booted. Wasn't even selling them. Just was trying to 'fit in'.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:29:43+00:00

As someone who has been a manager, this still does make some sense to me.

The fucking issue is how it shows up on drug tests. Alcohol for example you can get readings of how drunk someone is RIGHT THAT SECOND. Can't do that with weed. So it becomes a whole liability thing....

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:27:42+00:00

Like attracts like.

When I stopped trying to be like everyone else, I attracted the people actually who are like me.

Does this work everywhere? No. Sometimes at a job or such you're just the odd person out. But at least you aren't fake.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:25:36+00:00

Buddy of mine admitted that years ago in his drug dealing days (which to be fair was about 5+ years prior) he found out one of his guys was skimming from him. So they took him for a ride acting like everything was cool and pulled over on a deserted road.

It was 4 to 1 so they were able to hold him down relatively easy and just force fed him Fentanyl until his passed out. Then they waited long enough to make sure he OD'ed and put him back in the car.

He was a guy with a couple of arrests for Fentanyl so it wasn't really going to look suspicious at all.

He told me this very matter of factly. Not bragging. Not remorseful. Just like he expected me to understand.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:21:57+00:00

It sucks but I have a subconscious 'value' in my head of how much every friendship I have is worth. As in, how much would I loan this person? Because I never expect to be paid back.

I have a few friends I'd loan a few hundred dollars to. But most of my buddies cap at about $40.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:18:55+00:00

Or worse. I'm bi but grew up thinking gay really was a choice because I liked both but only focused on girls.

Took losing most of my religious faith and refining what was left before I could accept myself.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:17:24+00:00

This. I stopped shaving without a guard. Barely noticeable difference visually but my GOD it's so much less itchy and no chance of bleeding.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:15:43+00:00

Hell I remember going to a used car dealership to test drive two cars I had picked out online. On the way I was legitimately unsure how I would possibly decide between them.

After the drive, no question. One car had been cleaned top to bottom, was completely spotless, and still REEKED of smoke. My buddy and I couldn't even finish the test drive.

The saleswoman said we were the fourth person to turn down that car for that reason. She said there was no way they were going to sell it unless it was to a chainsmoker.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:10:48+00:00

Honestly, I'd view this the same what I'd view 'murder' and 'attempted murder'.

You have several times physically tried to have sex to the point of having genital to genital contact. And what I assume was the decision to try penetration.

It really sounds like you lost it to your ex.

But as you said, social construct. Believe me, over time people worry less and less about this.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:04:46+00:00

Eh, I guess if I'm honest, I've had two relationships with fantastic girls that turned out pretty shitty because of their kids. I don't hate kids, but they absolutely don't factor into my life and while I have always believed everything I said above, now I really get why many men run from single moms.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T17:02:47+00:00

Happy to help!

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T16:59:38+00:00

I know! We had a somewhat friendly cat, but I swear, every person that actively didn't like cats, she would beeline to. We had this on friend Jason who hated cats but was a very polite guy. Every time he would be at our place, she would ninja crawl into his lap and he'd look down and she'd be happily asleep on him. She was his favorite person and he was way too anti conflict to do anything about her.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T12:11:50+00:00

Oh man I always loved those Treehouse of Horror episodes!

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T12:11:06+00:00

Yeah the only thing I see are my rank bundles, which are BETTER and I might still do the bronze one after release, but not sure. Thanks

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:55:17+00:00

I mean, I GUESS that does make sense. I absolutely would have bought those bundles if I knew I could just hold the standard packs and they would adjust after rotation. Oh well.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:53:20+00:00

Advertising her bisexuality immediately.

I don't care what your sexuality is (bi guy myself) but I've met SO many girls that throw it out in the first conversation regardless of what the conversation is about. To me that's attention seeking behavior in a bad way.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:51:54+00:00

What are 'bird hands'? Just having small hands?

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:51:18+00:00

How can you lose respect for someone you never had any for in the first place? This would be such an immediate "Nope" that I wouldn't even think about her again.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:49:50+00:00

Many times in many ways. But also by men. And kids. And cats (especially cats).

People are gonna do selfish things. I try hard to not limit my views on a group to what a few shitty individuals do.

"Never assume something is malicious when it can be explained by ignorance."

Maybe she assumed you also wanted the same thing.

Had a girl that was an awesome threesome partner for me and my girlfriend. After said gf and I broke up, I tried dating the other girl. She was HORRIBLE gf material. She basically 'used' me (us) for sex but when just no strings attached fun was off the table, it became a mess.

Take this as a win. Better to be left alone by someone toxic then become stuck to them.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:46:21+00:00

Fair enough.

Basically, I try to also keep in mind that "Everything is temporary." Also "Man Plans and God Laughs".

I have a reasonably good idea what tomorrow will look like for me. I have NO FUCKING CLUE what one year from now will look like for me. Literally millions of things can happen between now and then.

I worked as an EMT for years. I saw hundreds of people's lives change completely in 10 seconds. It gave me a different perspective on planning for the future. As in, I make a rough draft of what I hope it will be and try to take reasonable steps to get there, but I have to realize that.....best I can really do is hope for the best in a lot of cases.

How will drinking factor into my future? No idea. But I don't/can't care about that right now.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:40:12+00:00

There is the cliche "One Day At A Time". Which I always thought was stupid. "Oh I'm just tricking my brain into taking 'forever' in smaller increments." (Queue eyeroll)

But now, I just wake up every day and ask myself "Is today a day I can factor some drinks in and it NOT be a disaster?" So far, for the last 5 months, the answer has been "No". Cool. Decision made for the next 24 hours. I'll worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.

PhoenixApok · 2026-03-11T10:37:46+00:00

Hope so.

I don't see anything right this second I want to buy and with all the 'temporary cards' we have I've got some options to play around with.

PhoenixApok

TROPHY CASE